To be annoyed at neighbour not consulting us over shared boundary?

[Fuzzywuzzywasabear]

We moved into our house at the beginning of the year, both our neighbours are older and have lived here for 30 odd years, the previous owner was 83 and had lived in the house for most of her life.

When moved in there was only a small green wire fence between our two gardens at the back, our garden is quite mature with a lot of shrubs and bushes so there is a degree of privacy but not a lot, we had planned to erect a fence at some point in the near future however.......

A few weeks ago our neighbour knocked on the door at about 8pm and informed us they were putting 2 fence panels up in the space closest to the house where there is no shrubs so we have more privacy......we were a bit put out by this as it's our boundary to maintain and they didn't actually ask us they told us the night before so we couldn't really say or do anything!

We let this go and said nothing, but this week we noticed they have now painted the fence on our side, without asking!

Is it unreasonable to expect them to discuss these things with us?

We find them to be a bit passive aggressive and are not really sure how to bring this up with them? We really don't want them just making decisions which affect the shared boundary without asking us and we would also prefer them asking if they want to access our property!

The white wall was out boundary and we said No so their paint didn't come through to our side. They were joking when they asked, anyway.

Hmm it's that time of year again ....

YANBU. Boundaries are sensitive issues & any changes to walls / fencing should be agreed by both parties in advance IMO. It's not acceptable for your neighbours to have painted your side of the fence & they should have asked before coming into your garden. FWIW, I discussed all this & more with my solicitor recently as I've been dealing with a fence problem at my DM's house & he said that the owner of the fence must either erect it so that the posts do not encroach on the neighbour's land or have the posts on their side. I recently had a neighbour carefully cut through my trellis & replace it with a hideous orange fence. I went nuts. If I were you, I'd ask for a meeting to discuss the boundary & come up with a plan that acknowledges the needs of both parties.

I actually don't think it is unreasonable for a neighbour to ask if they can come onto your garden to paint their fence.

I think someone strolling onto your property any time they feel like it because they've decided they are going to do something is rude.

In your shoes, I would just say it.

Please don't just come onto my property, I have dogs. If you need access, then let me know and we can arrange a mutually convenient time and I can ensure the dogs are not able to get out.