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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Or should you offer a workman a drink?

288 replies

Azquilith · 26/08/2014 21:50

DP fixes appliances for a national firm, and visits up to 8 houses a day. In London he not only often gets let in by the housekeeper at the tradesman entrance, but is seldom offered a drink. In the recent hot weather it makes me fume that he's working in hot utility rooms, shunting appliances about for hours and doesn't even get offered a glass of water. Do you offer someone in your home a drink?

OP posts:

hmc · 27/08/2014 15:25

"I can't see what's wrong with using a tradesman entrance when you are a tradesman. Although I have never seen or heard of anyone in RL having one. I have a side door to my kitchen and if it's a washing machine problem, I let them in there as the machine is right by the door. Perhaps this is rude or wrong?! Was I supposed to lay a red carpet from the front door?"

Oh dear Purple, don't be so obtuse. Of course you don't have to lay a down a red carpet . But using a tradesman's entrance with all its sniffy overtones of class and hierarchy, is entirely different to letting someone into a different door for the expressed purpose that this door is conveniently situated near the appliance that needs fixing.

I am genuinely askance that a couple of posters really don't see what is wrong with a tradesman's entrance (in this day and age) - apologies but it comes across as a bit naive. Have you all been watching too much Downton Abbey?

MrsCampbellBlack · 27/08/2014 15:30

But honestly who has a tradesman entrance nowadays - surely only people who have enormous houses with legions of staff. In that case I would assume you would be let in by the housekeeper via the appropriate entrance near the boiler or whatever.

And I've never even watched Downton Abbey

I bet a very tiny % of the OP's calls are to fully staffed houses.

PistolWhipped · 27/08/2014 15:30

I thought 'using the tradesman's entrance' was giving it someone up the ass.

blueshoes · 27/08/2014 15:31

Yes I do. I also instruct our aupair (who will be forrin and not accustomed to the ways of the Brits) to offer drinks if I am not around to let them in.

blueshoes · 27/08/2014 15:32

I don't have a tradesman entrance but sometimes they ask to come through the side alley or garage?

BBQSteak · 27/08/2014 15:32

no,i expect them to bring a flask

but I don't even drink hot drinks myself

TalcumPowder · 27/08/2014 15:34

I'm a writer who works mostly at home, and I've got sick, down the years, of the assumption in the part of many (though of course not all) tradesmen that I'm a 'little woman' with nothing more crucial to do during the day than let them in and make them endless cups of tea on demand. Literally 'Make us a cup of tea, love. Two sugars'. These days, I make it extremely clear that they are in fact in my workplace, that if they need me, they come and knock on the study door, and that they are welcome to make themselves tea, use the loo, or get a drink of water anytime, but that I have neither the time nor inclination to rush around after them with refills and plates of biscuits.

(The exception is our wonderful plumbers, who have been unfailingly kind, prompt, and gone far beyond professionalism, and could have a kidney if they asked.)

Fontella · 27/08/2014 15:42

I had workmen here yesterday putting up new fence panels (and it was absolutely pissing down).

They never asked me for a drink, but I offered as I always do and the answer was 'yes please love, strong tea - two sugars'.

So I made them a lovely big pot of tea - in a proper teapot with a tea cosy to keep it hot - big mugs, milk jug, sugar and a plate of biccies all nicely laid out on a tray and put it out on my garden table under the umbrella/parasol.

it was so funny seeing these two big burly blokes, soaked through to the skin, sitting out there under the umbrella with the rain chucking it down around them, pouring their tea out of the teapot, dunking their biccies and chatting away. I swear one of them had his little finger sticking out!

Wish I'd thought to take a picture!

Hulababy · 27/08/2014 15:44

Most seem to bring a flask here tbh.

If I am about and making myself a drink I will offer. Sometimes they say yes, often no as they have brought their own.

We often leave workmen in whilst we are out though. I d leave drink stuff out for them but it is rarely used.

Hoppinggreen · 27/08/2014 15:47

I once persuaded 2 workmen to do something that they weren't allowed to do and may have even been illegal by offering them both cappuccino's with sprinkles on!!!

hmc · 27/08/2014 15:54

@ pistolwhipped

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 27/08/2014 16:01

No never.

We've been having some work done lately, the plumber alone costs £30 an hour. Therefore he needs to be plumbing for an hour, not sitting on his arse drinking tea. He can do that in his own time and house.

I really don't get the whole 'sitting down and drinking tea every 2 hours or ill dehydrate' culture. I wouldn't expect it when I was working - I'd take my own drinks.

If he's genuinely thirsty though the ill gladly point the tap out. Tap waters pretty much all I drink. And people tend to drink water and carry on working. Unlike tea which takes 15 minutes of slacking minimum.

Serenitysutton · 27/08/2014 16:08

blimey £30 per hour for a plumber is pretty bargainous

i always offer. a few posters ssem to have missed OP saying her H does bring his own food and water. just nice to be offered.

BucktoothedGirlinLuxembourg · 27/08/2014 16:15

"Tradesman's entrance" is just the back door.

rainbowinmyroom · 27/08/2014 16:31

As long as it takes someone to open the flask they brought them a drink it, Aero. A lot of people work long shifts, so they bring lunch, food, beverages and not expect an employer to lay it all on for them.

They get breaks and lunch, and can get themselves a drink or snack same as anyone else in employment. I would not expect my boss, the person paying my salary, to make me drinks and offer me cake and biscuits at regular intervals. I am being paid by her to do a job and I have breaks and lunch to see to my hydration and sustenance.

rainbowinmyroom · 27/08/2014 16:36

I reckon most people don't give a flying fuck which door they go through to get to their job, they just want to do it, leave and get paid.

My place of work has a staff entrance. Clients get to come in through a other door. Big deal, I want to work to get paid.

Original poster

Azquilith · 27/08/2014 17:36

Ok. So just to note a) he does take drinks with him for the day, I just think it's polite to ask, b) he would never expect food, c) I agree with some posters saying that if they're paying by the hour and someone takes time to drink it's a bit off - my DP works to a set rate so someone wouldn't be paying for his drink. I will ask him what % of tradesman entrances he goes through, he works central London - Fulham, Chelsea so he's a bit skewed. Used to work in Liverpool incidentally and had a 100% hit rate on being offered a drink apparently...

OP posts:

DartmoorDoughnut · 27/08/2014 17:39

I always offer a cup of tea and a bit of cake, if I'm nice to them they will be nice to me/my house!

hmc · 27/08/2014 17:40

So, ' the "Tradesman's entrance" is just the back door' and 'most people don't give a flying fuck which door they go through to do their job'......

Interesting....I'm going to give that a try. Next time a workman visits and heads for the front door (on the basis that it is the obvious entrance, near the gates and directly, slap bang in the middle of the front of the house) I shall graciously overlook the fact that he has forgotten to doff his cap to me , but will, however imperiously direct him to retrace his steps and to divert around the side of the house until he finds the trademans entrance aka 'just the back door'. Should be interesting.

Pheonixisrising · 27/08/2014 17:48

I always offer tea/coffee/juice/bacon, sausage sandwiches / cake and biscuits
I've had a lot of work done on my house
Thought this was the norm

icanmakeyouicecream · 27/08/2014 17:49

Of course, and a biscuit or mars bar. If they are staying for the day I will offer a bacon sandwich too.

Abra1d · 27/08/2014 17:51

Always offer hot drinks. Sometimes biscuits. Never a meal.

EvansOvalPiesYumYum · 27/08/2014 18:01

I always offer any workman/tradesman drinks and biccies (cakes or muffins if I've made them) and if they're here for many hours and many days, they get lunch and dinner too. It's only polite! They bring their own food and drinks, but it's polite to offer. On the back of this, a very lovely builder and his son unexpectedly built us some steps from our new back door to the path, (which hadn't been included in the estimate) for nothing, as a "thank you" for looking after them so well. He was working for a company, but did it in his own personal time. That was really nice! Treat people well, and you will be treated accordingly (usually)!!

My DP is a tradesman, he always takes his own food and drinks (in hot weather, I freeze a bottle of squash for him to take with him, in cold weather it's a flask). Sometimes, he drinks it quickly, though. I get quite furious at people who can't even offer a cup of tea if he's working in their house all day. How rude, although to be fair, it is very rare. (He never expects it, though).

(PS - a plumber only charging £30 an hour - crikey, where do you live Ifyouareawizard? I'd be interested in getting his number)
But you still can't offer a cuppa? Shame on you!!

Abra1d · 27/08/2014 18:01

. . . Apart from soup for a fencer who was working in our garden when it started to snow.

rainbowinmyroom · 27/08/2014 18:19

I was not the poster who referred to a tradesman's entrance as just the back door, hmc.

It is a staff entrance. Many places have them. Nowadays, a lot of people don't care, they just want the work because the work pays bills. They are also perfectly free to turn down employment that they don't like, for whatever reason. There is usually someone who would rather live on food than principles.

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