To ask if you'd stay or go

[inmyshoos]

Will try and keep it short!

Moved to remote and very beautiful area for dh's work around 7 years ago. Have completely renovated and extended our detached cottage have a bedroom for each child and big garden. It is safe and very quiet. Good schools.
But i am lonely as fook. I do have a few very lovely friends here but i do miss having that big blanket of support in the form of family and old friends back home (4hrs).

Also my Dad is depressed. Lives 4 hrs away and keeps telling me how he is over the hill and 'just waiting to die'. He is saying it a little tongue in cheek but it breaks my heart. I know us living near him would give him something else to do. Being bored is one of his problems. He likes being busy. He will drive the 4 hrs just to fix my car when the garage here in the wilderness tells me 3 weeks before they can look at it for example.

Ok so now dh works away after being made redundant. He is on a far lower salary now. If we move back home we wont be able to afford a house anything like what we have now or afford to buy in as nice an area.

Am i being unreasonable putting so much value on a nice house and good schools? Are they a good enough reason to stay? I just dont know. I seem completely unable to make a decision. I think we should move and then look at rightmove and find we cant afford much and even then the council tax etc is double what we pay here!
Someone please help me make a decision.

Why can't your dad move near you?

Would you see much of other family and old friends? (and you'd miss your new ones)

Your DH works away - what impact would a move away make to him? Would you move nearer his work?
Do you work? Could you if you moved?

The area, house and schools would be very important to me.

Agree it does seem easiest solution for your dad to move near you

Area and schools are important things.

Do you not work? It's has many excellent benefits not just the salary.

Will your dad move closer?

Some considerations :
your DH. Would moving closer to Dad mean your DH was closer to his work? When you say he works away, he is actually living away in the week? If so, that must suck for both of you.
and DC - how old are yours. Mine hated moving house and schools and the older they are they worse it gets.

Thanks for replies. To answer a few questions.
My Dad would never move. He also would never ask or expect me to move nearer him. Plus my Mum would never move. Think she is a huge part of why he is so depressed. But i know having us near by would be good for him.

I dont work at the moment. No job opportunities for someone who has been out of my career for over 10 years and also very remote area so no work near here that could work around the dc (5, 7 and 10)
If we moved there would defo be more chance of work for me. This would definitely help financially and mentally for me.

Most of my family live in my home area and have all my old school/uni/work pals near too. In this area we live now i have 2 close friends who id really miss but know we'd stay in touch.

Moving would mean dh would be closer to work base so perhaps be home more often. At least when dh away would have my folks nearby.

My dc dont want to move house. They dont know any other life. They only know their tiny rural school and country bumpkin ways.

When i say not as nice an area i mean bigger, less pretty, more crime but only because closer to a huge city. Where we are now the nearest supermarket is almost an hour away. Schools would be much bigger and would have huge range of kids. Here they are pretty much all farmers!
The school we would move them to achieves better academically but would definitely be a culture shock for my dc. They think we are really poor because we are one of the few families at their school who don't own a quad! Maybe a reality check would be good!

My dc are bored that i am sure of.