Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

To think this is rude

45 replies

shareacokewithnoone · 23/08/2014 18:23

Just had car valeted, had to give colleague a lift. Car is new and shiny and smells clean.

Colleague scrapes her feet on the newly cleaned mats saying 'oh my god they are so slippy' until filth from her shoes are all over the car. Then lights a fag and my lovely car smells of smoke now.

Aibu to think it's just ignorant?

OP posts:

FunkyBoldRibena · 23/08/2014 19:34

You don't have to give her a lift, you can say 'meet you there at 9'. Or whatever time. And 'see you next week, have a nice bank holiday' and drive off.

Happy36 · 23/08/2014 19:58

She sounds horrible. Hope you can be brave enough to stand up to her over the smoking, or just not giving her a lift.

CrohnicallyDepressed · 23/08/2014 20:02

Also bear in mind that if you give a colleague a lift to something work related in work time, that could be considered business use- something you need extra car insurance for.

MrsGeorgeMichael · 23/08/2014 20:06

yuk! did you then go into someone's house and her smelling of smoke!

FryOneFatManic · 23/08/2014 20:09

And if it's classed as business use, I think the no smoking laws apply, as it would be a workspace at that time.

Fairenuff · 23/08/2014 20:21

YABU not to tell her not to smoke in your car.

Frontier · 23/08/2014 20:29

Yes, surely if you're working when you're giving her lifts then the car is your workplace and smoking in it is illegal? Ask your boss.

I think it is possible that OP has to give her colleague lifts. If I go out for a meeting and need to take a colleague with me, the company isn't going to pay two lots of expenses.

You should have told her no smoking though.

The mats I could live with, it's kind of what they're for.

FunkyBoldRibena · 23/08/2014 20:38

And if it's classed as business use, I think the no smoking laws apply, as it would be a workspace at that time.

It certainly would.

JADS · 23/08/2014 20:40

No one smokes in my car! It's fecking horrible. My driving instructor was a smoker and he was the first and last person ever to smoke in a car I am driving. I am a massive hard arse though.

The mat is another thing, but I would have made a comment.

Username12345 · 23/08/2014 20:40

Smoking in your car without asking is very rude.

Reminds me of the brass neck thread.

nocoolnamesleft · 23/08/2014 20:48

Bloody hell that's rude (and quite possibly illegal). The phrase "light that and you'll be walking" comes to mind...maybe you could present her with the bill to revalet the car?

Original poster

shareacokewithnoone · 23/08/2014 21:15

Thing is what applies in theory (smoking laws) don't always apply in practice.

I think we are exempt from smoking laws anyway.

OP posts:

FunkyBoldRibena · 23/08/2014 21:16

I think we are exempt from smoking laws anyway.

Do you work for the mafia? I hope they pay well.

Original poster

shareacokewithnoone · 23/08/2014 21:17

Lol if only (paid well!) it's in people's homes so exempt from smoking laws

OP posts:

foslady · 23/08/2014 21:25

Our operatives who go into peoples houses can refuse to do the job if the householder is smoking - it's their workplace whilst they are there, and if they want the job done......

Peekingduck · 23/08/2014 23:37

You're wrong Op, the law applies, but in any case you're really being a bit of a wimp if you're letting someone smoke in your car when you don't want them to. Really, get a grip as they say.

Peekingduck · 23/08/2014 23:39

I tell you what, if you're a carer, it's absolutely disgusting for someone who doesn't smoke to have a carer - or two - in their house stinking of it. When my Mum was being cared for at home we asked them to stop sending one carer because she absolutely stunk of fag smoke.

Lezprechaun · 23/08/2014 23:46

That's beyond rude! Who on earth thinks it's ok to light a fag in someone's car! I smoke but would never do that, I dont even smoke in my own car.

Nanny0gg · 23/08/2014 23:54

Lol if only (paid well!) it's in people's homes so exempt from smoking laws

No you're not. And the car isn't someone's home. Speak to your employer (you two must smell a treat when you go to someone's house - bleugh) and get some No Smoking stickers for your car.

todayisnottheday · 24/08/2014 00:05

You will be exempt in people's homes (if they smoke, not if co-worker decides to spark up! ) I worked in similar sounding circumstances to you, working in pairs, drivers coupled with non-drivers. Many smoked, I was shocked to find people would smoke in a non smokers car and that the driver would let them because they felt awkward in some way. I'm a smoker but never smoke in my car - and neither did my co-workers. I just said no. Generally they were shocked but compliant. One argued so I said, if she was that desperate to smoke, she was welcome to walk to the next location and smoke on the way. She declined.

In the spirit of full disclosure she did put in a complaint saying I was rude and bullying and I'd discriminated against her. Luckily I'd seen that tack coming and reported her behaviour already with a written statement of the conversation but no official complaint. She was advised it would be a bad idea to proceed with an erroneous complaint so satisfied herself with "refusing to work with me" which suited me fine . I earned a reputation for having put the bully in her place and her chokehold on everyone else slipped a bit. Definitely worth it!

Flip

1 2