To want DSD (12) to wash her hands?

[SDRyan]

She so rarely does, not even after using the toilet or removing poo from the cat's litter tray (or after doing a full clear out). We've explained to her the health risks, but she's not a girl who cares much about hygiene much (she washes once or twice per week, although only when DW makes her).

After we told her to wash her hands, she did (or so she claimed), although the water ran for about 1-2 seconds.

We have tried in the past to get her to wash her hands, but it doesn't work. She will just say that she does, but doesn't.

I feel sick just thinking about it. Although I know some people believe washing hands doesn't matter.

YANBU obviously, but I've no idea what you can do about it, other than say "told you so" if she gets a tummy bug!

I thought about getting the type of UV light that can show germs and it might help her when she sees the traces of faecal matter.

Yuk yuk yuk. Why don't you stand over her while she washes?

In our house everyone washes their hands after arriving home and of course after using the bathroom. Non negotiable and has always happened.

The teens' friends are all expected to wash their hands when arriving from town or school with the teens. Everyone does very happily and I get the impression quite a few other parents expect similar.

This helps keeps everything in the house grime free and, whether coincidence or not, we all stay remarkably healthy.

The uv light thing is a good idea.

Showing her pictures of thread worms might help too (Google images). In our house, we have kept on getting reinfested with the damn things for six months - I have very young children. They are about as common as nits, and about as easy to catch. The eggs are microscopic, get transferred around the house easily, and if you swallow them, (e.g.by touching your bum then touching your mouth without washing your hands) you have a whole new generation of worms inside you.

If one person in the family has worms, you have to treat the whole family, wash all the sheets and towels, hoover everywhere, do a massive deep clean... You would be justified in standing outside the bathroom insisting on hand washing!!

(But don't worry too much about worms at this stage, just use them as a scaring technique- they are not so common among twelve year olds as little children, I expect you already clean kitchen surfaces etc before cooking, and have trained all your other children to wash hands before eating, so should be fine)

And maybe get her a spray for them...one of those germ killing sprays.

she washes once or twice per week, although only when DW makes her).

Do you mean wash at all, or shower/bath? My twelve year-olds needed a ly shower.

Could she have her own special shower spray, shampoo and hand soap?

And I would be watching over her to wash if she changed the litter tray - she's sharing that all round the house! Show her the consequences of toxoplasmosis.

Why didn't/doesn't her mother enforce it?

she washes once or twice per week
Have her periods started? Surely that would make her shower or bath properly.
As far as her hands are concerned, I would flinch away if she tried to touch me - and tell her why.

DW does try to make her wash, but DSD will say that she did, even if she didn't.

@greenbananas, I'll show her some images regarding the parasites and bacteria and also get her to read about it, too. We did discuss the topic, but she didn't seem too concerned about faecal matter particles and that it sprays everywhere when you flush. She does know about washing hands before eating, but only seems to do it when we are out. I'm not OCD about cleaning, just my mum did a good job of making me understand the importance of good hygiene from an early age. :)

@Nanny0gg, a bath or shower (although I think it's always a bath). She has all her own stuff for the bath (even a few bombs from Lush), although she usually likes to use ours anyway. She has a Robo Fish and a few empty squeezy bottles that she usually wastes uses our shower gel, shampoo or whatever else on to make bubbles. So, it's not like it's boring for her. I've worked with quite a few smelly people (sadly), so I do understand that not everyone likes to wash (just rare that it has been women - very, very rare).

@Sallyingforth, no, not yet. I thought an interest in boys might change it, too, but not yet.

YANBU to want her to wash. She especially needs to after going to the toilet and changing litter trays. If the cat litter has been soiled for more than 24 hours then there is a risk of toxoplasmosis.

YABU to say you not 'OCD' about being clean No excuse for that level of ignorance.

*you're, obviously.

School Nurses have the UV lamps. I borrowed one for my class for a week when we were looking at health and hygiene in relation to the swine flu outbreak.

I don't understand why she has the choice to wash her hands or not.

Some things are essential, and this is one of them. Is this a symptom of another problem, perhaps?

I would stand over her each and every time she should be washing her hands. At her age she should be doing this as routine and shouldn't need to be babied but not washing her hands put you all at risk. I'm all for kids not being too overly molly coddled when it comes to 'germs' but washign hands after toileting is an absolute must.

DS used to do the 'yea yea, I'v washed my hands...then he got worms and he has upped his game