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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have given my Dd "Barbie Wine"

43 replies

justaweeone · 22/08/2014 16:37

Currently on holiday at the moment and have let Dd 16 have a very weak Buck's Fizz . She has just reminded Dh and I how from the age of about 6 to 10 years she had barbie wine.( ie a glass of water served in a wine glass with literally a drop of red wine to colour it pink)!!!
Feel a bit horrified now and Ds 11 didn't have anything like that as young as 6 years but we have let him have a can of non alchoholic beer on hols.

OP posts:

MrsDarylDixon · 22/08/2014 20:07

wildcherry I went to school in France in the 80s and we had watered down wine with lunch too. Ah those were the days...

Sunshineaftertherain · 22/08/2014 20:09

I was allowed diluted wine from about age 6. I don't drink regularly now. I have maybe one glass a fortnight if that and only if out. I never drink at home.

At 16 I was going to over 18 nightclubs so I wouldn't worry about your dd!

fluffyraggies · 22/08/2014 20:14

Mine had a glass of wine or bucks fizz or a sip of what the adults were drinking from 6 ish. None of them have showed any tendencies to binge drink when out with mates. DD1 and 2 actually have zero interest in alcohol. (DD3 is only just spreading her wings)

However, my DF did the same with me when i was young - a small glass here, a sip there, and i DID show an interest in alcohol once i was old enough to be out alone. I got paralytic most weekends and still have a tendency to se alcohol as a forbidden treat and to binge.

So ... i think it's down to the personality of the child.

slithytove · 22/08/2014 20:22

I have been allowed sips of parents drinks as long as I can remember, and shandy / wine and lemonade since about 7. Proper wine since about 12.

I don't really drink now, have gone 3 years without missing it much due to pregnancy and bf, and when I do drink again bring on Christmas I'll be happy with 2/3 drinks.

It's all anecdotal but I think teachg a good attitude to alcohol is more important than disallowing it.

Stealthpolarbear · 22/08/2014 20:38

chief medical officer's advice

BigChocFrenzy · 22/08/2014 21:07

I had a tiny thimble-sized glass of undiluted sherry or homemade sloe gin every Sunday afternoon from the age of 4 (1960) No SS interest then !

As an adult, I've never even been tipsy, just have a small glass of wine every few months.
I remember I found the taste rather harsh as a small kid and this feeling remains at age 58. I just never want a 2nd glass, very rarely a 1st one.

So a tiny amount as a tiny tot worked well for me.

FloatIsRechargedNow · 22/08/2014 21:22

Wow - now here's a post with a lot of stuff going on to consider, made greater by the fact that, all things considered, no great (or small) harm has been done to any dc at any time nor will be (methinks).

Naturally, for me the draw was in the headline - "Barbie wine" - curiosity needed it's meaning confirmed which is...watered down wine served to children during a 'dining with adults' experience. So far so good, no probs and all fine.

But it's "Barbie" so it means girls (in the main) and I think OP has considered that no such option has been offered to her ds. Which is basically a tadlet UR and my suggestion would be "Bart Beer" which could easily transform into boy-agreeable "Fart Beer" for use after much non-"Barbie Wine" has been drunk by adults.

But then what message to the girls? You grow out of 'Barbie' and drink stronger stuff?

Hmmm, OP you've gone and opened a great can of worms. Oh well done you!

Pipbin · 22/08/2014 21:41

You were fine but my own story here as a word of caution.

My folks let me drink, they are strict about everything but I was allowed to have a drink with them in the evenings from about the age of 13. Just a glass of wine or a shandy. The idea was that if I had sampled drink and it was normal to me then I wouldn't want to drink when I was older.
It didn't work. By the time I was 15 I was stealing spirits from home and drinking with friends.
When I was 16 I moved away from home and, as this was many years ago when it was easier, I was drinking in pubs most nights.
I realised that I had a problem when I woke up one morning wanting a drink.

Although I didn't stop drinking entirely I did slow down and now I am able to drink in moderation

I don't want to worry you at all OP. You did nothing wrong. But I don't subscribe to the whole 'but in France children all drink with their meals before they are weaned' theory.

Original poster

justaweeone · 22/08/2014 21:42

Float -I had completely forgot that is what we called it.
Now it seems really wrong,but now she is having a v watered down amaretto with diet coke !!

OP posts:

Sicaq · 22/08/2014 21:44

We had wine on special occasions from about 9 or 10. As PPs have said, totally legal. I hardly ever drink these days, so it didn't turn me into an alcoholic

mumminio · 22/08/2014 21:56

Sorry but alcohol impacts brain development. It's not true that introducing it early/gradually makes addiction/abuse less likely later; actually the opposite is true.

Source: retired pediatrician neighbor who went to a conference on this last week.

Stealthpolarbear · 22/08/2014 21:59

And the CMO!

Jollyphonics · 22/08/2014 22:29

I can't imagine why anyone would want to give a 6 year old alcohol. What purpose would it serve?

BigChocFrenzy · 22/08/2014 22:42

Any studies showing French and Italian kids having their brain development harmed more than ours do ? Their Chief Medical Officers, like those in other EU countries don't seem to agree with ours.

The issue is quantity - chaotic households where kids get drunk, obviously VERY bad. Guidelines in the UK seem to go overboard for zero tolerance, don't trust parents to do small quantities.
(same as for the occasional glass in pregnancy)

combust22 · 22/08/2014 22:55

France has the highest rate of alcohilism in the world, I don't think that should be held as a country with sensible attitudes to alcohol.

BigChocFrenzy · 22/08/2014 23:03

Austria, France, Latvia, Lithuania and Romania are all in the higher band of alcohol consumption in the EU countries, but Italy and Greece are in the lowest band.
Seems to depend on many more complex factors than whether kids have very small amounts young. Cultural habits later on, price, tax ... ?

BigChocFrenzy · 22/08/2014 23:07

The UK sadly wins the binge drinking / drunken yob award in the EU.
Some of our tourists sadly shame our country; that does seem cultural.

slithytove · 23/08/2014 01:42

I think when I was wee it was less about giving me alcohol (as in, an active choice), and more like they (dad) wouldn't say no if I asked for a sip. And if I asked to have a drink it would be something like half an inch of dads lager in a glass of lemonade.

Not sure if I would do the same, but I don't think it negatively affected my attitude to alcohol.

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