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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is this weird..?

17 replies

cakecake · 20/08/2014 21:42

quick disclaimer - commuting to and from work gets very boring and I'm a nosy bitch

I don't think there is anything sinister behind this.. Just slightly strange! too much build up as it's not actually that interesting Anyway, an ex co worker's daughter (B) - 18 years old (but looks/acts very young, more like 15), gets the same train home as me (she is coming back from college). Her and her friend were befriended by this very friendly man - about mid 30s/40s. They began sitting with him everyday, lots of giggling from the girls. College broke up for summer about 6 weeks ago but often saw B waiting at the station, never saw who for, until today- she was waiting for the friendly train guy and they walked off together.
Mothers- how would you feel if you found out your teenage daughter was meeting someone double her age to walk them home from the train?
And how would you feel if you found out that your husband (I know he is married) was being walked home by an 18 year old? I wonder if his wife knows?!
Aibu to think this is a bit odd? B's mum is very protective so would probably hit the roof if she knew.

OP posts:
IsChippyMintonExDirectory · 20/08/2014 21:52

That's a tough one

On the one hand she is an adult woman and what she does is none of her mums business.

However 18 is still very young, young enough to be fooled by a sleaze charmer without thinking about the consequences.

I would talk to the girl directly, in a Friendly way and just say you're concerned that everything is ok and this guy isn't manipulating her, married men are usually after one things from other women and you don't wanna see her get hurt.

ThirdPoliceman · 20/08/2014 21:53

Hmmm. Odd definitely. My exH had an affair with a teenager so alarm bells from me.

Original poster
cakecake · 20/08/2014 21:58

If there was anything more, I don't think the mother would not be very happy if she knew I had seen them together! Also they must have swapped numbers as 6 weeks is along time to keep something going whilst she hasn't been at college.

OP posts:
MrsWinnibago · 20/08/2014 22:00

when I was 18 I had a lot of boyfriends...casual ones...I slept with some, others I just kissed and yet others I would just flirt with. Some were in their 30s.

Odd? I don't know...I wasn't uncomfortable with it, I was an adult. Immature in some ways but mature in others. I was seeing a man of 36 when I was 19. My Mother never interfered.

WallyBantersJunkBox · 20/08/2014 22:02

But he's married?

He's definitely not a family friend of some kind is he?

Original poster
cakecake · 20/08/2014 22:03

MrsWinnibago - yes true, in terms of age she is old enough to make her own decisions but... He is married though...

OP posts:
MrsWinnibago · 20/08/2014 22:04

oh missed that he was married! Shock I would tell her Mother in that case. She might not even know....the girl I mean. :(

WallyBantersJunkBox · 20/08/2014 22:10

I would bring it up, it could be a very gentlemanly thing to do - walk a young girl safely home, so you could ask if that's the arrangement?

WallyBantersJunkBox · 20/08/2014 22:10

Sorry I know she's not a young girl, young woman.

Original poster
cakecake · 20/08/2014 22:16

Wally but it's her waiting on the station to meet him off the train!
I don't know if my over suspicious mind is making mountains out of molehills. Maybe they just have sparked up an unusual friendship Hmm

OP posts:
Stealthpolarbear · 20/08/2014 22:22

Do you know him

Original poster
cakecake · 20/08/2014 22:28

No - he sparked up convo with me once or twice... Just friendly chit chat.. This was before him and B started chatting.

OP posts:
Original poster
cakecake · 20/08/2014 22:31

And Wally - sorry missed your previous question.. Doubt he would be a family friend as they were complete strangers for the first part of the year and it was only once he had starting making random conversation with the girls that they started to sit together etc

OP posts:
ithoughtofitfirst · 20/08/2014 22:55

Faaaackin 'ell

I don't think I'd be bovved tbh

(don't have a daughter don't know what I'm talking about)

ItsANameChanger · 21/08/2014 10:08

I don't think you will gain anything from talking to her or her mother. I would, personally go directly to him and tell him to back off but that's just me

Original poster
cakecake · 21/08/2014 12:33

ItsANameChanger I agree about not talking to the mother, well for now anyway, she is extremely over protective and it could all get massively blown out proportion if it turns out be nothing more than a weird friendship.

Other slightly weird thing is...he mentioned to me in a previous convo that he lived 5/10 min drive from the station so had to drive home...surely she wouldn't meet him off the train to walk him to the car!

Will keep an eye to see if i see them again and then follow them

OP posts:
Mrsjayy · 21/08/2014 12:43

Oh I dunno thats tricky I think what I would do is say I saw x at the train station today does she have a new boyfriend and see what mum says

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