AIBU to find it insulting when benefit organisations tell me I am very articulate?

[fluffyduffydoo]

This AIBU is going back a few years.
I became a single parent and lost my home due to the death of my partner (life insurance didn't cover the circumstances) and one phrase that kept coming up when dealng with the dept of unemployment and the housing office and even the CAB was 'you are very articulate'

I found it patronising bordering on insulting but I'm not sure why?

Almost as if they were surprised someone was asking for needing help and who were, well 'articulate'

No-one else has ever called my articulate but this seemed to be a buzzword used towards me n my experence.

Does it have a secondary meaning that I'm unaware off, such as a pretentious annoying twat or something?

Yes, I can see how it could be phrased as "I used to think other people were dim: now I understand the system's the problem."

I was hearing it more along the lines of: "I've never thought anything about people using this system, but am shocked to learn it requires the same level of skills as my management job. This is all wrong."

And I couldn't agree with you more about the vile pejorative use of "knows how to work the system". The toad beneath the harrow either gets a pretty darn good idea where those toothpoints are, or doesn't survive.

It infuriates me that my disability benefits actually went UP (to what they should have been) when my condition improved slightly, because I became well enough to engage in the required buzzword bingo and navigate arcane appeal procedures, and I had the experience from the previous rounds. In a word, I became more articulate...

Hmm, that last I put bit isn't quite right.

I'm bundling "having the experience and information to draw on" into the word "articulate", as well as "having general language skills". There's probably a dollop of "having confidence" in there as well.

Are those valid ingredients of the concept of "articulacy"?

last I put bit I put

[ articulacy typing fail]

When I had to apply for income support - my dd was in hospital for a long time and I couldn't work - the woman that interviewed me asked me if I had any GCSEs. I said "yes, 10." She said "sorry, I meant A-C"

Cheeky bint!

I reeled off my gcses, A levels and NVQ and she squirmed.

I am not surprised . There is this assumption that everyone who signs on is 'fick'

at SouthernComforts!

At an appointments at the jobcentre my (lady) advisor said that she doesn't know how I haven't got a job yet as I am 'So beautiful and intelligent!'
I didn't know what to say, and then she kept repeating how well I was dressed etc.

I felt really uncomfortable!

*appointment that should say :)

When I had to sign on a few times between jobs :( the guy I saw was a bit baffled when he asked me if I had been 'Job Searching'. I said yes, I was looking in the local papers and The Guardian. 'The Guardian?! But that's a big paper!'

I kid you not.

I feel I've fallen through the cracks a little... and it is really hard I think.

I was struggling with a newborn in dodgy London flat. Needing help with pnd. "What, you went to Oxford, Oxford?!" In a very obvious well how did you end up here way.

looking back I wish I'd been able to say - well we dont all have rich partners/parents/ ability to buy before 2005 etc etc.

when I finally did make it to a group it was v obviously geared to a different market. The one I did in my new area had a session "this is a book, what types of books can you think of? Do you think it would be good to read to your children....." the group of about 6 mums then all turned around and debated which of the many libraries in the area we preferred :) not what the leader was expecting!!!

Meant to say above was interaction with a HV

Miaw - souns like a similar experience ( I was a secondary teacher house full of books!). Obviously we're not allowed to struggle...

I similarly faced dificulties (and still do at the doctors at times) that in the right mood I can be reasonably objective and articulate about my mental health. (Having a psych degree just further baffles them.)

presumably we aren't the first professionals to need benefits/support/pnd help/etc.

Ah, but mental illness is a sign of moral deficiency, doncha know? Whereas you've passed the tests of moral success (educated, intelligent, read long words).

So how could you be mentally ill?

Ah yes that old chestnut. You can't be mentally ill you re intelligent

Miowthecat Is reading important with babies though? I got that talk but I'm really skeptical. Mine enjoys a book now at 2, but it was all pretty meaningless as a newborn.
I mean, I'm sure he enjoyed my voice, but he could have got that just from talking or singing. I didn't really bother reading until he was much bigger but I always felt faintly guilty because it was presented as such an important thing.