To think this isn't a great alternative to a dummy

[mumaa]

One of the mums at our group has brought her friend to join us has recently had a baby. After chatting a bit she has expressed that she is really again her baby having a dummy, fair enough.

However, she constantly puts her pinky in her baby's mouth for it to suck on. AIBU to think this is really quite unhygienic... your hands are pretty manky and responsible for most germs being passed around. Her husband also does this (obviously) as well as her mother and her inlaws when they babysit.

Obviously its her child and her choice, but am I alone in thinking this isn't a great thing to do. I was actually surprised how I felt about it, never seen anyone do this as a regular thing.

Not something I'd want to encourage and no different to having baby relying on a dummy in my opinion.

I think you need a grip. A child will put a lot more unhygienic things in their mouth at some point. How weird of you to even think of this.

Revolting thing to do, and if course the child will be every bit as reliant on it as they would on a dummy.

You've never seen anyone else do this, really?

My children were always having fingers stuck into their mouths to give them something to suck on.

It was almost a reflex, hand someone the baby, and at the first hint of a cry, in went the finger!

Midwives, doctors, grandparents, siblings, me, everyone did it. No one died, and the children have fairly robust immune systems these days.

If she's washed her hands recently I wouldn't think it would be dangerously dirty. After all, no one disinfects their nipple before breastfeeding, as far as I'm aware. I wouldn't be sticking my finger in a baby's mouth after patting the dog or gardening though.

Well it was good enough for Lady Di!

The only thing I'd worry about is that she's going to have a baby that relies on sucking someone's finger to settle them back to sleep. It's not ideal at 3am when you've already got up to settle him 5 times already. Maybe she could make a fake finger out silicone or something. Like, you know, a dummy!

A finger can be a good alternative as you tend to remove it sooner than a dummy.

I don't think it's the best idea but not a big deal. Babies who don't have dummy's tend to suck their own fingers, which would be even less hygienic, at least an adult knows to wash their hands regularly.

dummys

Dh used to do this with ds1, he was a sooky baby and dh lacked boobs!

My mw insisted this was why ds1 got thrush, not because of IV antibiotics, but as both his siblings had IV antibiotics and oral thrush without sucking on pinkies I am not sure this was necessarily the cause.

It is a risk factor however, as it introduces germs to the baby's mouth, and I wouldn't let anyone's fingers in my baby's mouth, dh only got to do it as he was ds1's dad.

Nothing wrong with dummies, bottles or fingers really whatever gets you through the early days.

Never smug judge as it will bite your arse down the line.

A midwife advised we did this when ds was a newborn as he wanted to suck all the time, we gave him a dummy but the finger thing worked quite well.

I was advised by midwives to do this and it made a lot of sense to me. They might settle with the little finger but they don't learn to rely on it to stay asleep.

Unless you've been handling something hazardous like dog faeces and not washed you hands thoroughly, the germs on your hands are unlikely to cause a baby harm. They need to come across small numbers of germs in order to support the development of their immune systems.

Sterilising bottles and milk is largely about preventing large numbers of food poisoning bacteria from growing in the milk and making it toxic.

Dummies are dirty too, once they've been in use for a few seconds.

As long as their fingers are clean, I don't see the problem.

Hygiene wouldn't worry me.

But after spending three days having dd1 suck my finger trying to avoid a dummy, I caved.far easier and saves you having to actually be there.

Being able to put baby down and walk away was amazing.

Dummies are fab :o

I did it. With a clean knuckle.
Hated it if anyone else did it! Especially my mum.

But dummies are brilliant, I don't know why people have an issue with them.

DS used to love my or DH's little finger. Calmed him down in an instant. He liked it right up in the roof of his mouth and dummies just didn't do the job properly.

I don't get this panic about a few germs. Being exposed to a bit of dirt and germs improves and strengthens a child's immune system - and research has shown that children who don't get to do this, have a greater chance of developing asthma later on.

I did this with all three of mine, and all are now strapping, healthy young men.

Why is everyone so hung up on the slightest germ getting into a baby? Obviously you make sure your hands are clean if you're going to do this but babies need to be exposed to germs in order to build up a resistance. I'm not saying that you should give your baby raw chicken to suck on but even a sterilised dummy will still have germs on it due to where the teat joins the plastic.

I let DS1 suck on my finger at first but quickly realised a dummy meant I could actually roll over and go to sleep!

SDTG

Great minds, TheHomicidalPower!!

If they wash their hands (and I'm sure they do) then it isn't dirty. I would just say whatever suits them. To me it would seem a pain to be constantly 'lending' baby a finger.

Thumbsucking is the way to go. This sort of dummy is free, never dropped or lost, is always there and has only baby germs on it. and they look sooo cute

OK I know about teeth etc so will just wait for criticism.

As long as you have clean hands and put your finger into the baby's mouth with the nail against the tongue and not on the roof of its mouth, to avoid scratching, it's fine.

I was very unimpressed at a party when my pfb was tiny. Her father had let a stranger hold her and told her to put her finger in DD's mouth. I wanted to scream at them both but as calmly as possible I just told her to turn her finger around and hissed at my husband at the first opportunity.