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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To shout a the kids in the street!

27 replies

susiewoos · 12/08/2014 20:47

Really annoyed with local kids in our street. Ds 8 can't play out without this bunch of girls winding him up, pushing and shoving him, general name calling. I have encouraged him yo stand up for himself but I think he feels a bit overwhelmed. They have now started throwing things at my windows, keep banging on the front door and being real pains in the arses. Obviously their parents don't seem to be bothered about their behaviour as these kids live on the same street and they haven't come out to see what's happening. Anyway I lost it a little while a go and told the ringleader to fuck off . Admittedly not the nicest thing to say to a child but I saw red and sometimes it's the only way to get across how angry I get with them. If anyone has any better ideas on how to get rid of them the advice would be much appreciated.

OP posts:

Original poster

susiewoos · 12/08/2014 21:01

Bump

OP posts:

cathpip · 12/08/2014 21:08

Local community policeman would happily have a word I'm sure.

AgentProvocateur · 12/08/2014 21:08

Have you tried talking to them or their parents? Can't believe you told a child - how old? - to fuck off. I'd be pretty pissed off if I was child's mum, and I think YABU.

ADHDNoodles · 12/08/2014 21:13

You told an 8 year old child to fuck off?

You couldn't talk to their parents because....?

Now you're just the crazy lady on the street.

TessTackle · 12/08/2014 21:15

You'd be annoyed an at the end of their tether adult told your spiteful bullying aggressive 8 year old to fuck off?

OP, I think you may need to go and talk to the parents of there horrible children, maybe in front of them!

Staywithme · 12/08/2014 21:15

I don't blame you. I'd be pissed off too, but it might be best approaching the parents and saying something along the lines of "I just want to apologize for swearing at the kids earlier but...." then calmly explain why. Good luck.

SlowRedCar · 12/08/2014 21:16

Anyway I lost it a little while a go and told the ringleader to fuck off confused. Admittedly not the nicest thing to say to a child but I saw red and sometimes it's the only way to get across how angry I get with them. If anyone has any better ideas on how to get rid of them the advice would be much appreciated.

you could do what a woman in Holland did last Sunday when she got frustrated with neighbourhood children, drive on to a footpath and run them down with her car, leaving them both in a critical condition in intensive care. She has since been charged with two counts of attempted murder.

Seriously OP, you need to get a grip if the only way you as an adult can get a message across to 2 small children is by telling them to fuck off. Is it any wonder your own child feels overwhelmed by confrontation when you too so obviously are.

FreeSpirit89 · 12/08/2014 21:17

I personally think that if the parents can't be bothered to deal with there little darlings, then they can hardly go mad when they annoy other people.

Squtternutbaush · 12/08/2014 21:17

We have this too its bloody awful and its easy to lose your sense when your child is being bullied, I've been there recently so don't beat yourself up about it.

A few months ago I had to chase a young boy who was hitting my son with a golf club, DS was understandably shaken so I approached the mother only to be told that she "didn't give a fuck" and "its a shame the little bastard didn't bleed to death". I called the police, they came to visit and told me they weren't going to speak to her as it would aggrivate the situation due to her mental health

A few days ago I caught the boy and his sister beating my son with large sticks, I called them animals and told them to piss off back to their cages because that's where they belong.

I was annoyed with myself for letting rip like that at kids but if I have to scare them off I will!

KissMyFatArse · 12/08/2014 21:17

In the heat of the moment I don't blame you.

If the little brats have the audacity to throw stuff at your window in their own street without fear of their parents seeing then I'm sure speaking to the parents wouldn't have got you anywhere!

Have a

Original poster

susiewoos · 12/08/2014 21:17

Agent, yes I know it was wrong but I saw red. These kids are constantly taunting Ds, they don't seem to get that they are being a pain. A lot of the kids on the street are just left to do what they want, no other parents seem to intervene. There was a three year old out on his bike on the road the other night ffs. Dh almost hit him with his car, gave him a massive fright but still the child is allowed out with no adult supervision. It feels like as long as the kids aren't under their feet the parents don't seem to care. We've had children climbing over our fence in the back garden to steal balls, whilst we are in I may add! Their parents were in the house and weren't stopped. Just had enough of the behaviour in my street.

OP posts:

TattyDevine · 12/08/2014 21:17

Sounds OTT but I have no idea what kind of area you live in or what the kids are like - in some areas this might be the most likely way of resolving things from what I have heard! It would be COMPLETEY ott in my street but its not terribly...uh...urban? where I am.

The proof is in whether they back off I guess!

Give us an update! Even if you get egged and stuff.

chubbyhez · 12/08/2014 21:17

How old are other girls?

You should have been dealing with it before getting to the point e you went out and swore.

WorraLiberty · 12/08/2014 21:20

Instead of judging the parents, you need to speak to them.

You might be pleasantly surprised.

If they don't know anything about what's happening, how can they do anything about it?

Although now you've told a child to fuck off, you might find their reaction a little different to how it might have been.

Original poster

susiewoos · 12/08/2014 21:23

The thing is I have never come across behaviour like this and to this level. I have lived in different areas and am quite shocked that people let their kids behave like this. I know if my kids were being shouted at I would want to know what's going on. Ds never has any problems like this as his school and it wouldn't be tolerated. Grr it just really makes me angry that people will not control their kids, if they can't behave they shouldn't let them play out.

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 12/08/2014 21:24

But how are the parents supposed to know what's going on, if you haven't told them?

They're not going to have a crystal ball.

Original poster

susiewoos · 12/08/2014 21:28

The thing is though worra Ds did speak to the ringleaders mum the other day about it and it's still happening, it's happening nearly outside of the girls house.

OP posts:

Dontgotosleep · 12/08/2014 21:28

Agent I see your point. I'd go nuclear is someone told my d.d to fuckoff but not saying she is an angel far bloody from it, but she wouldn't have attempted to near anyone's house in an intimidating way. She was taught right from wrong morales compassion and respect! and
if parents didn't have the "and "fuckin what" attitude "My so and so can do what they like" and discelpined their little darlings once in a while o.p may not have gone that far. I've actually heard a parent say that. This lovely old lady across the road from me. She has a lovely garden anyway this boy about 6 at the time was picking flowers from her garden and the lady came out and said which she had a right to, it was their home. Keep away from those flowers. Next second now keep in mind this is old lady both the child's mum and dad go knocking on the door ranting and raving at her, and fuckin what they're flowers in the garden what's your fuckin problem. I'm sorry but I couldn't watch a poor old lady being intimidated like that. I just couldn't at the time I wasn't even thinking about the consquences, so I went out and said to them. You're a bit out of order..... Mind your own fuckin business was they inevitable reply but I stood my ground. If I see anyone being bullied of intimiadted I wont stand for it. Simple as that. The shouting carried on.. Until her grandson (6ft tall) turned up on the off chance..... Big brave man who picks on old ladies.... Shit himself when confronted with a man... Oooh always the way, put a man against these bullies they run for the hills... I tell you what she was never bothered again!.
They've since moved away Their son is now a teenager I wonder what he's like now, be ironic if he's turned out be the nicest kid ever more.

WorraLiberty · 12/08/2014 21:32

The thing is though worra Ds did speak to the ringleaders mum the other day about it and it's still happening, it's happening nearly outside of the girls house.

You are the parent here. You need to knock and speak to the other parents.

No matter how 'rough' people are (and believe me I live in a rough area), we all have kids in common, and we all worry about them at times.

At least try to appeal to them, rather than let your DS deal with it or you ending up swearing at the kids.

TattyDevine · 12/08/2014 21:33

This may be no help because like I say I don't know what these girls are really like but I always try and befriend the kids in the street a bit in their own right - I have them in, give them a snack, do loom bands and shit...within reason but if they feel they are welcome in your home and have a friendship with YOU, they are less likely to piss you off and your children.

Sorry if that sounds a bit little house on the prairie, but it sort of works for me and when my kids have fallen out with others on the street we've been able to talk about it and smooth it over because they actually like me for me if that makes sense...

Dontgotosleep · 12/08/2014 21:34

For the record Suzie. I don't think y.b.u. Things are said in the heat of the moment. You're human you lost it. It happens.
There's an old saying kids can be so cruel and it's true.

Original poster

susiewoos · 12/08/2014 21:35

Thanks don't go, like I said I am not proud of swearing like that at a child but I was fuming. There seems to be no discipline of children in my area, everyone does what they want when they want and to hell with everyone else, children included.

OP posts:

ADHDNoodles · 12/08/2014 21:42

The thing is though worra Ds did speak to the ringleaders mum the other day about it and it's still happening, it's happening nearly outside of the girls house.

Ok, but you as the parent need to speak to the parent. What an 8 year old sees as speaking to a parent a parent could see as "Little Suzie is being a annoying" not as a bullying problem. It's up to you to let them know how serious this is.

Original poster

susiewoos · 12/08/2014 21:46

Ok, so what would I say without coming across as an overbearing and interfering mother, help me word it and get the problem solved peacefully please.

OP posts:

morethanpotatoprints · 12/08/2014 21:49

Drop a bucket of old washing up liquid on them if they knock again. Open the door and chuck it over them whoops was just emptying my bucket, sorry kids.
Not helpful I know, but it wouldn't half be funny.

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