Just to want to be able to go out without the third degree?

[PollyCazaletWannabe]

I have been with my DP nearly ten years. We are both female.

Tomorrow I am planning on going out with a friend from work for a couple of drinks. So far I have had DP doing the following:
Asking if she can come and then saying 'no you don't want me there because you want to talk about me '
Looking up my friend on Facebook (I know!) and commenting that she is 'a bit young' (she is 8 years younger but does that really mean we can't be friends?!)
When asked what we are doing tomorrow, huffing and saying, 'well, I know POLLY'S going out with her (sarky voice) friend'
She has this big thing about who you can call a friend. Apparently you haven't known people at work for long enough to be friends. They should be referred to as colleagues. Because I call this woman my friend, DP keeps on about it.

AAARGH I just want to go out! Is that really so unreasonable?!

Err.... not unreasonable at all! Ignore her. Go out and have fun. You're entitled to your own friends whether colleagues of new or not!

YANBU, your DP sounds jealous and controlling

Oh Fab, I take your point but this is actually not the same friend! I am not seeing that one as I am trying to distance myself.

I don't even go out much at all without her. Maybe once every 2 months or so. But every time I do there's this whole performance.

Bump please. How should I deal with this if iANBU?

If there is something going on with someone else in the background, has she picked up on it and maybe feeling insecure?

It does sound like controlling behaviour but what is the context, what else is happening in the relationship?

There is nothing going on with anyone else! I have posted a couple of times about my strong emotional feelings for a colleague but she has no idea how I feel and I would never do anything about it. If you look back at my other threads you will see that there is nothing sexual in my feelings.

I am quite unhappy with DP, mainly due to her controlling behaviour.