To want someone to give me a huge kick up the ass?

[KateSpade]

So, MN I really need a kick up the ass, so if you are willing to be really honest, please tell me what you feel I should do?

I have posted about this a lot - regarding the way my employers have treated me regarding myself having epilepsy, forcing me to wear a fall alarm & having someone check up on me every 30 mins, I have never been so degraded or patronised in my life, I only have fits in my sleep and have provided Drs letters saying this is unnecessary, am I thinking too much about this?
Their are lots more issues with this job which make it unbareable, regarding not being allowed to remove my jacket when it's warm,

I've been searching for another job, but it just hasn't happened.

I need someone to be honest & tell me if I'm being a baby & need to 'man up' or if it's them that are the wankers. I keep bursting into tears at work & feel like such an idiot.

So I am at your mercy?!

I take it you have contacted ACAS already?

Of course they are wankers! Get the hell out of there, you are never going to beat them! Get out while you still have the strength!

You should have left when this whole episode started. They are disgusting

for you

Yeah, I've spoken to ACAS & they've advised to put things down in writing, suggesting alternatives. However it will mean the insurance is invalid if anything happens to me, if they take the alarm away.

& like you said MammaTJ I'm never going to beat them, at all.

I need to get out of here & fast!

It sounds like they're trying to push you out, very deliberately.

I'm tempted to say if you can't beat them then wind them up a lot? I'd be "falling over" a lot to make the alarm go off and asking the person sent to check on you to bring you drinks/food/fan every time they came over and pestering HR for lots of expensive equipment.

Probably not the mature approach though.

You do need to man up, tbh. They can't force you to wear an alarm, simply refuse to. Then the ball is in their court. Maybe they will fire you, and you can sue the bejaysus out of them.

They can only walk all over you if you let them. Don't. If you're too hot, take off your jacket. Are they going to manhandle you back into it?

I said to myself yesterday, that if I was still here in 18 months, I would simply hand my notice in. However I think 18 months is too long, I might make it three.

I haven't worked for the company long enough to put in an unfair dismissal claim, but I do agree with you grockle they can't force me to wear it, however I know my role would suddenly be made 'redundant' if I caused a fuss, but then I hate working their anyway, so maybe a need to just hand my notice in & leave?!

no, let them make you redundant, or fire you. Why make it easy for them? Then you go to a tribunal and say: hey look at how my job was suddenly "redundant" when I wouldn't let them treat me in a humiliating, disabilist, illegal way any longer!
And kerching for you, and a big slap in the face, publicly, for them. WIN WIN!

And you get some self-esteem out of it. Don't slink off and let them win by default.

by the time it happens, you prob will be there long enough?

Would you not have grounds for constructive dismissal?

I do agree and normally I have to admit that is normally me, sticking up for myself, not letting myself get walked all over - no issues with my epilepsy have ever risen before however I just don't think I have any fight left.

Oh, god. What has become of my life?!

Just think of the boost it will give you to take back some control then. It's like exercise, you have to make yourself do it but very quickly you are much more able.
You'll feel better if you get up off the mat and say no more

Sorry to say this, but you are right as you have no grounds for conductive dismissal ( less than 2 years employment). They are following procedures ( not unlawful). However it seems they want you out ( as was the case with me).
Your best bet is to get the hell out of there; they really will strip you of any self esteem you have left.
Get a job with a big firm; join a Union and draw a line under this horrible experience . I have and will never give myself the chance to be treated so cruelly again.
Laws are there to protect employers and not employees, this is a fact.

Thanks, upup it's cruel and regardless of my issue, it's a very cruel place to work. Your right about the self esteem. I've cried three times today and I know it's making my epilepsy worse, which is dangerous in itself.

I want to just up & leave, but I have bills to pay and can't really do that without something else,

It's a shit situation and I think I need to take some time off.

I feel your pain OP. Been there in my last 3 jobs and I tell you I'm no pushover!
Regardless of what " professionals" tell you we are up shit creek without a bladdy paddle.
Get with a big firm, they have to take on a percentage of people with disabilities ( I know yours does not impede on your ability to do good job)
I had to take diazepam just to stop myself going over the edge. My colleagues don't return my calls ( they have been played the divide and rule game no doubt).
Tell your employees you are seeking legal advice regarding the alarm and wearing of jacket in hot weather,and see your GP asap and get a sick note ( breathing space).
It'll give you time to gather your thoughts and apply for new jobs.
There are still some half decent employers in this country, but things are never going to change in you current post.
Are you involved with any epilepsy support groups? They may had some advice .

I work in insurance. I seriously doubt that the insurers are making those rules about wearing the fall alarm and 30 minute checks, especially if it is contrary to your doctor's letter.

You could call the insurers yourself to request a review of the underwriting conditions around your medical condition. They probably won't talk to you because the policyholder is the company not you. However, they might well give the company a boot up the arse for giving out false information.

Insurers really really really hate being falsely blamed for "health and safety gone mad" stuff that is actually nothing to do with them at all.

Personally though, I would get a shit hot employment lawyer and go to town on the bastards. It sounds like you have the makings of an excellent case. The payout could tide you over until you find a new job. Lawyer up.

Cookie has a point here. Still go on the sick ( you clearly are unwell) .I see an out of court settlement winging it's way to you ( they won't want the hassle /expense as they know they are in the wrong) , enough to tide you over 'till you get with a decent firm who value you skills and everything you have to offer.

Do you mean with the current job market upup? As that's what my friendlier colleagues have been saying and you can't deny it's true, I'm stuck in the 'uni graduate' position at the moment & not driving doesn't help, as much as I don't want to admit I can understand where there coming from.

cookie I've tried to find out who the insurer is, but It's confidential information, but I'll do more digging, however I ACAS told me that not wearing the alarm - allowing me to - would invalidate their insurance as this is seen as a pro active way of dealing with my disability, or something of those words, he also went on to say it could be seen as disabalist however.
I have contacted epilepsy action, and they said it wasn't illegal to force it - which wasn't what I wanted to hear, however I know if I refused to wear it, somehow I'd get fired.
In the time between me coming back from being suspended and ordering the alarm I had to be 'shadowed' throughout my whole time being on company grounds, someone was sat next to me whilst I was doing my job, going on dinner, ect.

Also, I offered to cover for my colleague - job share I work afternoons, she does early mornings, and my boss actually said 'oh, no I wouldn't want you working a full week, that's far too much for you'

Forget all the advertised jobs, I just approach companies directly.
I've had more than my fair share of shite bosses,
Got a kick up my arse by my Mom, who suggested becoming a bus driver,and hey presto! result!
There are worse jobs you know.
OK this isn't going to be for you but there are still opportunities out there.

I know their are worse jobs, I have a mental note of a few in my head!
My job is changing to a customer based role and I will now be showing the executive guests to the waiting room & making them a drink - oh joy!

Are you a bus driver then upup?

Not yet OP. Second interview in the morning.
I've had quite a variety of jobs ,and most of them have been very rewarding.
I'd suggest steering clear of anything to do with charities or care work, for some reason they are often run by the most toxic, unhinged bullies imaginable.