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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think there is no excuse to be leered at by a man?

11 replies

FreeSpirit89 · 03/08/2014 14:07

We live in a flat block, and one man (40's) lives with his mother (60's) has been standing on the stairwell and staring into our windows.

His bedroom windows looks over into another flats kitchen and he's been videoing that tenant on his phone while she does things in her kitchen, also stands outside my bathroom window looking in (caught him yesterday dh had gone to buy a blind.)

Here's the thing, he may have learning difficulties. Not sure which and to what extent, but we've accepted that for reason for the oddness before, like when he was taking photos of our cars, and knocking over plants.

But this is making the woman of the block feel uncomfortable. We've had a polite word but it doesn't seem to make a difference he's been back out there today!

What can we do? X

OP posts:
Aeroflotgirl · 03/08/2014 14:08

Police now. Call 101

Aeroflotgirl · 03/08/2014 14:09

Learning difficulties or nit, it is unacceptable behaviour and us voyuristic

FreeSpirit89 · 03/08/2014 14:13

Thank you Aeroflotgirl, I didn't want to seem like I was over reacting.

OP posts:
MyFairyKing · 03/08/2014 14:22

Have you spoken to his mother?

nc987654321 · 03/08/2014 14:25

I second calling 101. The police won't necessarily barge in there to arrest him, but you don't know if he is NT or not so...

Fairenuff · 03/08/2014 14:27

Ring 101 and ask them, they won't mind and will be able to advise you.

FreeSpirit89 · 03/08/2014 14:31

Yes. Several times that's hoe we know he's got some form of learning difficultly with normal expectations of social situations. But his mum still treats him as a child.

I shall give 101 a call and speak with them. Maybe a chat from a police man will make him see it isn't acceptable.

OP posts:
fishdishwish · 03/08/2014 14:38

Did his mum say anything about actually addressing his behaviour?

victoryinthekitchen · 03/08/2014 14:50

Adults with learning disabilities need to have things explained regarding appropriate behaviours like anybody does, if it's not dealt with then it could escalate into a more serious matter. Hopefully the local police will have a friendly but firm word, it may be that he could access some help regarding appropriate boundaries and consequences.

FreeSpirit89 · 03/08/2014 15:30

His mum didn't really say much tbh. More "oh he wouldn't do such a thing but I'll have a word"

Called 101 and they say no actual crime has been committed, but they are nothing it down. And we have been given a ref number, just keep an eye on it, they have recommended we report it to landlord too.

OP posts:
CaptainHammer · 03/08/2014 15:59

I don't know much about it but how is videoing people in their own home not a crime?!

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