to think there is something wrong with Americans?

[TheBloodManCometh]

In Colorado, here for 5 weeks.

Why the HELL is there a half inch gap on either side of the door in all public toilets?? You can see everything going on!!!
This has been the case everywhere I've been in America?
AIBU to be both baffled and embarrassed

lighthearted btw. I don't really think there's something wrong with the Americans

I've been to America loads of times and never noticed this!!! Is it because I only go on the coast?

If I wish the use a euphemism for going to the loo I say that I am off to 'turn my bicycle around'.

hate hate hate American toilets.

1. the famous gap

2. I regularly get assaulted by self-flushing toilets

3. there just seems to be... less water pressure? or narrower pipes? whatever it is, it's the only country in which I live in constant fear of clogging the toilet. Will never forget the first time I visited my parents-in-law.

American men, if length requires, know to hold their penises out of the toilet

Or so I've heard.

What do Americans say when they actually mean bathroom ie somewhere to shower or have a bath?

Bathroom.

We have no separate words for rooms with just a toilet and rooms that include a shower.

Though when putting a house on the market we call them "half bathrooms" to give an accurate picture of what your house has. But, in conversation, they're all "bathrooms".

My US friend emailed me in great excitement about her new house that had 4 beds and "2.5 bathrooms". I didnt like to ask so I googled and it meant 2 bathrooms (in her case, 1 ensuite and 1 family bathroom) and a downstairs bog!

I call my half-bath a powder room.

If I'm using the restroom in public, I say I'm going to the Ladies' Room.

I've never heard "going to see a man about a dog," but I've heard, "going to see a man about a horse."

So do Americans never say "ooh hang on, I need a wee/pis/(insert culturally appropriate word)"?

piss not pis!

I say, "I have to pee," but only in front of close friends/family. With work colleagues or people I don't know well, I say I need to use the ladies' room.

I've never really thought about it, but I was raised to think it was kind of crass to talk about it. My mom didn't even like for people to say they had to pee. She was very private about such things - I mean, the woman didn't pass gas in the entire time I knew her. :)

So do Americans never say "ooh hang on, I need a wee/pis/(insert culturally appropriate word)"?

Nope. Sometimes, like Steff I say "I have to pee" if I'm with friends, but you don't say that in polite company. It's very mildly vulgar or impolite, but nothing that's going to make people say "that's rude", iykwim.

I think if you came to America and said you had to piss, you'd get some strange looks and maybe some giggles. But "piss" is a rude word over here, so it's like saying "I have to shit" over there. Sort of but funny at the same time.

I don't know how to explain it. We're weird and immature with toilet humor over here anyway.

the woman didn't pass gas in the entire time I knew her. Does "pass gas" mean Fart?

And Piss is rude when you say "Piss off" but not rude when you say "ooh I need a piss", at least not in my world!

Does "pass gas" mean Fart?

Yes. That was another word she didn't like, so we didn't use it. I always say "pass gas." My mother was very, well, some might say "repressed," but I prefer "refined." :)

steff, my mom used to say chirped. We were never allowed to say fart growing up. It wasn't until I was older and in middle school that I realized chirping was only something birds do.

That's funny. I am going to out myself as a giant weirdo, but I've never said that word, because my mom told me not to. We were forbidden to say that, the n-word, and the word "ain't," and to this day I've never said any of them.

My kids say "toot."

It's definitely not something you'd say in polite company here.

I have never heard an American man complain about the-penis-in-the-water thing. I will ask DH when he gets back from the grocery store and perhaps text my brothers.

Think about that for a minute. Do you really want to know if your brothers are that hung that their penis dips into the water?

It's a good 10 inches from toilet seat to water in American toilets. That's the joke to "complain" that your penis falls in the water and what a nuisance it is.

Well, I was only joking about asking them. I did ask DH, but can't repeat what he said even on an anonymous forum.

I think one basic cultural difference is that Americans spend a lot less time thinking about toilets than the British do.
Or maybe that's only my English family.

Well....on the plus side, I feel prepared for our trip to America next week. Most enlightening, if bizarre!

Better than pigs in Goa....gross!

Happy, I can't help thinking that joke would have more comedic value here :o

No way in hell anyone's penis dunks in the water!

Yes all rooms with toilets are bathrooms. :o We have a bathroom upstairs with no bath, but it is a bathroom all the same.

To be fair I think a brit would call a room with a shower, toilet and sink a bathroom too. Shower room makes me think that it only contains a shower.

But I think that the reason a toilet without a bath or shower is called a toilet/cloakroom is because historically bathrooms and toilets were quite often separate (often with the sink in the bathroom part, not the toilet! Bleurgh!)