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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I am so bloody embarrassed !

51 replies

Plomino · 31/07/2014 12:54

I think I've just become notorious . Long story short , we live in the sticks . Our neighbours have chickens , and every so often we get rats in our stable yard , which the dogs tend to despatch with great glee . I've just been outside doing the mucking out , when one which was hiding in the straw has suddenly made a run for it . Trouble is it's run across my feet , on which I have trainers because it's so hot, instead of my usual yard boots, and a pair of socks . The buggers only got its claws caught in the fabric loop in my sock. I hate rats . I mean really hate them , so I scream like a banshee , simultaneously flailing my fork at my foot which I am frantically shaking about to detach the thing , screaming " get off me you bastard " and "I could do with some help ....... " aimed at the three teenagers sitting indoors at about 200 decibels . The hounds come running out just as I manage to fling the bugger off my foot with all the vigour of an Olympic discus thrower , and promptly kill it . I then decide to go and have a cup of tea to get over the shock .

5 minutes later not one , but 3 police cars screech to a halt on the drive . It seems my neighbours , who can't see into our yard because of a huge hedge , have heard me yelling , and thought I was being attacked , and called 999 . Bless their hearts . I then had to explain to 3 rather large policeman why I was yelling , as they politely and quite rightly insisted on checking the house just in case . I ended up showing them the mangled rat remains as well ! I'm going to go next door and thank them for keeping an eye and ear on us , but thank goodness my other neighbour wasn't home - he'd have turned up with a shotgun!

I'm so embarrassed .....

OP posts:
YeGodsAndLittleFishes · 31/07/2014 16:35

Snort! DH wants to know what I'm laughing about. Will save to share later. Thanks for sharing op.

You will have to move, as per..

kinkyfuckery · 31/07/2014 16:35

What great neighbours you have.

Such a funny story. You'll be the talk of the police station tonight Wink

lettertoherms · 31/07/2014 16:36

At least you didn't stake yourself in the foot.

And you have excellent neighbors.

NickNackNooToYou · 31/07/2014 16:39

Grin Flowers Wine for making my day - hilarious

If a you know what (can't even say the word) ran over my foot I would've wet myself which would've been even more embarassing!

Anotheronebitthedust · 31/07/2014 18:02

ChoccaDoobie - your friend's DOG unwittingly called 999? Do you mean DC or is there a fantastic story there? Confused

mumofthemonsters808 · 31/07/2014 18:11

How hilarious, never a dull moment hey,I would have screamed and shouted abuse too if a rat got stuck on me. Bless the elderly couple ringing the Police, I bet they were really concerned about your safety, they sound lovely. You will remember this story for many years, the embarrassment will fade and you will laugh as many of us have.DD wants to know why I'm smiling at the computer, when I should be washing up!!!.

Groovee · 31/07/2014 18:15

This needs to be in classics! Glad you have good neighbours who do ring 999!

Shallishanti · 31/07/2014 18:15

thanks for sharing- I have had several unpleasant rat episodes but none so funny
and with all the awful things going on right now so nice to hear of everyone doing their best to help each other
maybe there's hope for the world after all

SquinkiesRule · 31/07/2014 19:45

LOL Thats a great one OP. Good neighbors you have there.
My cat chased a field mouse up the leg of my trousers one time. I stood there screaming with my hands clasped about my knee so it wouldn't go higher and shaking my leg to make it drop out. I never made fun of farm friends with bailing twine tied around their ankles in the barn after that.

Thenapoleonofcrime · 31/07/2014 19:49

LOL that's really had me laughing. Your neighbours are awesome, but so are the police-three whole cars!

SorryForTheTypos · 31/07/2014 19:56

Rats are horrible horrible bastards and I'd still be screaming now so I think you're doing very well!

The neighbours must be peeing themselves laughing now!

Lally112 · 31/07/2014 20:04

AAAHHH, youre giving me the heebies. Il stand in the field while the bull charges at me, il walk in with a lead rope and grab 3 biting fighting stallions, I will Ram my hand up the charolais vulva but catch me in a pen with a rat and I'm screaming for my rifle. Awful bastards always make a jump for your throat too if you corner them and theyre forever leaping out at me from the hay bales.

wtffgs · 01/08/2014 13:51

Fab neighbours! Smile

Bastard rat! Grin

Greyhound · 01/08/2014 14:08

Oh no!

Years ago, a big rabbit ran over my foot and left massive claw marks. It left me traumatised for quite some time.

SarcyMare · 01/08/2014 14:16

just shared this with the office.

bellarations · 01/08/2014 14:26

Im crying with laughter!
Sorry but that's the funniest thing I've read on here EVER!
I'm sure you ndn is glad you are ok.

mignonette · 01/08/2014 14:30

Wonderful neighbours. Lucky you Smile

TheThreeCheesesOfTheApocalypse · 01/08/2014 14:34

Thank you op.

I've been rather 'bunged up' of late, however I've laughed so damn hard at your post I feel definate stirrings, I shall report back !!

Will 'mumsnet made me shit' be a first ??! Shock

Jayne35 · 01/08/2014 15:05

Brillaint! Going to laugh about this every time I think about it. Thanks OP Smile

Roussette · 01/08/2014 15:16

What a great story although I would have probably passed out and would have needed an ambulance if that had happened to me (and RIP Roland Rat!)

CheerfulYank · 01/08/2014 15:19

Hahahahahha and how sweet are your neighbors. I love that the husband was going to come round with a shovel!

emasch · 01/08/2014 17:19

in All the time i have been registered with this site i have never really posted messages or read thoroughly, well until i see this post appear in my email inbox well well well lets just say i needed a good laugh and that's what i had reading this. its classic, thank you mr rat well dead rat for causing all this smiling :-)

AllHailTheBigPurpleOne · 01/08/2014 18:09

I'm laughing at the image of someone hopping into A and E and having to explain why there is a dead rat attached to your foot with a pitchfork

Astonway · 01/08/2014 18:33

Hilarious! Rats are everywhere but mainly stay out of our way. An old mare of ours didn't like them and we found one squashed in her stable with a horseshoe-shaped stamp on it! Coincidence? Impossible to tell. then a few weeks later we found another one like that in the field! We suspected that she waited and stamped on them - rats are not afraid of herbivores.

londonrach · 01/08/2014 18:34

Lol..