Selfish??

[mummaduke]

I either need to give DH a bollocking, or get a grip... Help me decide.

Went to a garden party at friends house yesterday. DS hot,bothered, overtired etc so I took him for a walk in pram. DH came with me to pick up ice from corner shop.

On arriving back to the party, driveway leading to garden is all blocked with cars. DH nips past, says he'll come open the front door so we can take DS through still sleeping in pram. Simples.

Apparently not. 15 mins later and I'm still waiting at the front door. DH not picking up his phone. No one can hear doorbell as all outside.

AIBU to be utterly pissed off with wanker husband for forgetting us?

He's claiming he got held up unpacking the ice, then assumed I'd have 'gone for another walk'. He never came to the door. I had to leave DS in pram, go through to the garden to find husband in garden with a beer.

Tell me,AIBU to be livid? He can't see the big deal. Worse still, he's making out like he didn't forget us, he just got held up and because I didn't come out back sooner, I must have kept on walking...

Half rant, half AIBU. I'm just so pissed off with my husband being in his own world atm

That would really annoy me too, especially not answering the phone.

I'd be annoyed too. Out of sight, out of mind?

Forgetting about you is something DH would have done understandable. Getting a beer and lying to you - YANBU.

I'd be pissed off. Like you are some kind of second class citizen who isn't expected to be able to enjoy the event.

Looks like a beer is his priority

YANBU, I would also be livid. Plonker ( him, not you )

I'd be well pissed off. DH wouldn't dare

How did he forget to answer his phone? What is his answer for that?

If he had answered that the rest wouldn't have happened.

I would be livid. It just sounds a little implausible.

Phone not on him, he'd left it in the kitchen. How could he forget? How hard is it to open the effing door???

Is ne normally so self centered, or is this unusual behavior?

But, implausible as it sounds, why would he have deliberately left his wife and child standing on the doorstep and trotted outside for a sit down and a beer?

Unless he has form for being a total shite then his explanation is plausible.

As for 'how did he forget his phone?' FFS unless it is surgically implanted why would he carry it into the garden? Not everyone forgets to breathe/dies if their phone is more than 2 inches away. Most people (I hope) put the damn things down when they get home!

And after all OP could get to the garden.... so no real harm done. Just one of those things...

Nomama, they weren't at home. They were at a friend's house for a party.

No, no real harm done. But he was thoughtless.

Not how could he forget his phone, how could he forget us?!

Well, it's annoying, but it was yesterday. I don't see the point in being annoyed about it still, 24 hours later. If you've had a word with him already, isn't that it done? It sounds like a bit of an oversight to me, stuff happens, doesn't it?

I would be annoyed too, but I think it's pretty understandable, and not worth remaining upset over too long.

Sure it happened. It was ok.

BUT, he made out like he hadn't forgotten, put it on me. Then I was over reacting.

All I wanted was a 'shit, yes, I forgot. Sorry'...

Implausible in how he forget his wife and child were outside in the ten seconds it probably took to get his beer.

I think the OP has every right to still be annoyed if the DH obviously doesn't give a shit that he forgot about them.

I'd be annoyed too, YANBU.

He's an arse

I too would be furious in this situation, and I must admit I can see DH doing something like this. He is at times incredibly one track minded, so for him the scenario would have been - go in, carefully put ice away - see people in garden, must go out and be sociable - oh, there's some nice cold beer there - oooops, there's DW, totally forgot about her and DS.

Only I would hope that DH would be suitably apologetic once he'd realised what he'd done, not least because he'd realise that otherwise he'd be going without meals, shags and a quiet life for a long, long time to come.

I would be bloody livid too....however, I can see how this could happen. You go into the garden unpack the ice, see someone who you haven't seen for ages, someone else asks where the loo is etc. Before you know it you have forgotten your DW at the door!

Yeah, the thing itself isn't so much of a problem as the ridiculous 'I thought you'd have gone for another walk...' sort of excuse.

Surely the only acceptable thing to say in that situation is 'I'm really sorry.'

Of course people forget stuff all the time - that's just being human. If it puts people out, you apologise though - that's just good manners.