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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS wants a Barbie dream house. AIBU to buy him one?

64 replies

ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:05

DS is 3.5 and loves the Toy Story trilogy very much. He has all the toys apart from the Barbie and Ken (because they are really hard to get hold of!)

It's his birthday in 2 months, and I've been asking him what he would like. He wants the Barbie and Ken dolls from the movie, and also Barbie's Dream House, so they have somewhere to live.

He is going to pre school in September, and then will be going to school at the joining school, so the kids he's with then will be with him for a while.

I really want to buy him the things he's asked for, and he's been asking for a few weeks now and the list hasn't changed. However, I don't want to get judged by other mums when we have friends to tea, and nor do I want it to become a subject for bullying or teasing him with when he's older ("ziggieboy had a Barbie Dream House!" Etc)

What shall I do?

OP posts:
MorphineDreams · 24/07/2014 17:25

A fandango you say?

That's my mum's name for a fanny. Your phone has a fanny Wink

monsterowl · 24/07/2014 17:28

Buy it. Anyone who thinks there should be a gender divide between toys or colours is a moron.

Ilovehamabeads · 24/07/2014 17:29

My DS asked Father Christmas for a dolls house last year and he's 6. It was a playmobil one though so not at all pink but that wouldn't have put me off. He loves it. His friends that come over have never said anything nasty about it or laughed at him. His cousins and his older sister's friends always make a beeline for it as they are 'too old' to have playmobil of their own but obviously secretly love it. They think he's cool :)

Pointeshoes · 24/07/2014 17:29

I wouldn't buy a girl one tbh, things like that are usually over priced and get played with for abit and then they move onto something else. You may find that when he's in nursery school that he suddenly doesn't like pink and he says 'that's for girls that is '. And no matter how much you say to him, it doesn't matter, at that age they all want is what their friends have. Maybe, wait for Xmas to see if he still wants one. Or get a cheaper one off ebay so it's not wasted?

curiousgeorgie · 24/07/2014 17:30

But Monsterowl, OP is happy for her DS to have one, she just doesn't want it to be a way for other children to upset him if they see it.

You could spray it. It comes in loads of sheets of stuff. It will take you AGES though....

Original poster
ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:31

norks that's a good response!

He wants it because it's in Toy Story, not because it's Barbie.

OP posts:
needaholidaynow · 24/07/2014 17:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:35

Should I spray it? Just in case he trots out the 'pink is for girls' shit later on...

But having said that, he's said to me before 'mummy, pink is your favourite colour because you're a girl' so he's got that from other children. So what if it's already come in, and he doesn't care?

OP posts:
hellokittymania · 24/07/2014 17:35

thatwasnice, forget the kids, I want one! Grin

Op, get it! People will always have an opinion, if not about barbie, then something else. Ignore them!

enderwoman · 24/07/2014 17:38

As a pre-schooler I doubt that he'd get teased. Once he goes to big school he will probably face the Barbie is for girls comments but I'm guessing you have at least a year before you have to pass it on.

I'd go for a more neutral coloured one. My sons played with a dolls house that took Barbies at your son's age but it was white so gender neutral.

Original poster
ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:39

this is the product in question, in case anyone was wondering.

OP posts:
Original poster
ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:39

Or can anyone link to a similar one in a more neutral colour?

OP posts:
DogCalledRudis · 24/07/2014 17:41

How expensive it is and how much does he want it. We usually give "waiting time" for more fancy toys because DC may crave it one minute than decide its not that interesting. Also how much is "really need" vs. "just that i have"

MrsTerryPratchett · 24/07/2014 17:41

Because I don't want to mention it being a girls toy or anything, in case it makes him feel ashamed. This makes me want to cry. Why should a boy be ashamed to have something that is 'for girls'? Ashamed? We should be bloody ashamed that we aren't challenging this.

I wouldn't buy it because we are all eventually going to drown in a sea of pink plastic but second hand, why not?

5madthings · 24/07/2014 17:42

They are hideous looking but if he wants it why not.

I dint think you will find another dolls house to fit Barbie sized dolls?

My boys have had a dolls house.

And many of my friends boys do as well including a pink one.

The other alternative is the little tykes big dolls house you can get but it's not as detailed at all.

Original poster
ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:44

mrs exactly. I agree with you. But what I don't want, is some little bastard darling coming over and teasing my little boy for his choices. And then I don't want him to look back and say 'why did you buy it for me mum, I got teased?'

OP posts:
5madthings · 24/07/2014 17:44

The little tykes one is unavailable. Only coming up on second hand gumtree type sites.

Original poster
ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:44

They are bloody hideous!

I like the detail in it, and I know that he would too. Lots of buttons to push and things that do things etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
ziggiestardust · 24/07/2014 17:45

And I won't be buying anything until a couple of weeks before! He's not usually a mind changer when it comes to stuff like this, but I will make sure it's what he wants.

OP posts:
themightyfandango · 24/07/2014 17:47

My DS (7) has a large barbie sized house. Best present ever, it has been played with every day for the last few years and yes plenty of visiting boys play with it too.

He gets comments every now and again it doesn't bother me or him.

It also gets used with Dr Who figures, makes a perfect base for recreating the alien hotel episode.

It's just imaginative play, just buy him one and don't over think it too much.

Ours is one of the wooden ones that comes with furniture rather than an actual barbie one. I think it's slightly more durable.

MsMariusPontmercy · 24/07/2014 17:51

I'd suggest buying it for him, and leaving it pink (the only thing worse than spending the money on it and having your son later decide that 'pink is girls' would be buying it and going to all the effort of having it resprayed, only for him to respond with "But Mummy, I wanted the PINK one!".

Later on, if he decides he doesn't like pink, you could always help him decide whether he would like to help recolour it, to put it away when certain friends come to play, to pass it on or sell it, to keep it and enjoy it in all its pink glory etc.

monsterowl · 24/07/2014 18:12

Curious, I know, but leaving that attitude unchallenged perpetuates it. Better, I think, to explain (gently) to any kids who make comments that all toys and all colours are for everyone.

I appreciate the difficulty though, especially with older children who would want to know why other kids were mocking them.

traviata · 24/07/2014 18:12

OP there are quite a few Barbie Dream Houses on ebay identical to your link, if you can organise collection;

here

there are also other Barbie and Barbie sized houses, if they might pass

GodDamnBatman · 24/07/2014 18:13

At three kids are parroting their parents. No kid is going to care what toys your son has unless the parents are making remarks.

My brother had a pink Barbie car, and I had TMNT figures. No one questioned our toys. My friends didn't even question when my brother (and sometimes his friends) wanted to play dress up with us. We just giggled and put make up on him, everyone had fun. It never went beyond a "hee hee... boys wearing lipstick is silly" as far as thought went. As soon as it was off it was forgotten about, there was never deep thinking involved with it. Not that it even matters, but he grew up to be straight.

It's good to let your kids just pick their own toys. They have their entire life to be bombarded by peer pressure and society. Let him be himself now so he feels comfortable doing it as he gets older.