to not serve coffee at a wedding?

[ikeaismylocal]

I think I must have asked the most aibu about a wedding in the history of mumsnet. It's the same solo waltzing uncle wedding.

Wibu to not serve coffee? We are putting the buffet together ourselves and the practical challenges of making enough coffee for 100 people is overwhelming me a little.

In my dp's culture coffee is very very important, I have been to alcohol free weddings but never coffee free weddings.

In British culture would it be incredibly odd/rude not to have coffee at a wedding? If it wouldn't be rude we will have no coffee and I'll just say it's British culture.

I was so curious about which other culture this was and then it turned out to be mine - feeling very exotic now

You may already know this, but Swedes are very easy-going when it comes to weddings and regard it as your day to do as you wish, rather than a string of things that Are Expected. Your DH's relatives are unlikely to complain or find fault if there's no coffee.

Saying that, there will probably be a few people getting twitchy without their fix towards the end...

www.liquidline.co.uk/commercial-coffee-machines/bean-to-cup/cb4600

Phone and find out how much a daily hire would be

Someone else mentioned coffee bags - they're cheaper than I thought they would be www.thelittlecoffeebagco.com/shop.html and that way you'd only need to supply the hot water and some tea bags for the tea drinkers.

I have to say that I have always had coffee/tea at the weddings I have been to. I'm not a big drinker and enjoy a hot drink in the evening.

lyonscoffeeuk.com/

These are lovely with prope filter coffee inside the bags.

All you need is hot water & milk to brew coffee bags. Set up a table & get people to help themselves or have a friend on coffee duty.

I buy the Lyons coffee bags from Tescos & it costs 2.80 for a box of 18.

The food is buffet, but I'm assuming there are tables for the guests?

A large plunger on each table with a thermos of hot water will be fine as long as the coffee is good quality. They can make their own.

I hate coffee and don't drink tea either so wouldn't be bothered at all I would be upset if wine wasn't available though.

I think elderly guests really appreciate a cup of tea or coffee.

Buy a few cafetieres from Ikea.

Not another coffee thread!

I've never seen people have non instant coffe at a buffet.

I've never heard anyone complain either.

I think it's one of those 'only in the mniniverse' things.

Oooh the coffee bags do look like a good solution - and any you don't use can be kept for after so not a waste of money!

The coffee bags are a great idea, I had no idea they existed. I think I'll get some of them and some posh teabags and have them available throughout the evening.

It's not really the "proper" way to do things but hopefully it's a good enough compromise!

I would really appriciate coffee being served and I am not 'elderly'

I bet you could borrow a hot water urn- maybe local church, church hall, school, residents association. Then tea and coffee bags will sort you (or borrow a few friends' cafetieres too.)

Our old residents association had one we lent out. They are life savers

In my dp's culture coffee is very very important

Assuming that a good proportion of the guests will be from his culture - I think you'd better figure out a way to have coffee!

Those bag things are definitely tastier than "normal" instant coffee.

Filter coffee percolators for sale at a tenner each - here. They make ten cups each, keep coffee hot for an hour. Three or four of those on the go and topped up as necessary, job done, minimal expense.

Now, what about cups of tea?

Could you get 1 large cafetiere per table & just put the coffee in, add the hot water & leave them on the tables for people to serve themselves? And have crockery, sugar, cream etc already on the tables?

As someone who is Swedish I would expect coffee to be served at a wedding....would expect it to be served everywhere . However I do see your dilemma.

Could you not borrow some of those huge thermoses that have a pump on top? Even if people only get a small cup it will hopefully satiate them. And remember it's Sweden so you won't need to faff with milk!

Now have visions of instead of a vase of flowers being in the centre of each table, there being a thermos and a cafetiere....

The vast majority of Europe do not drink instant coffee weatherall, and there is definitely a coffee culture in a lot of places where decent coffee is expected. It's really not an 'only on mumsnet' thing. It's more a 'stepping outside your own limited experience' thing.

I would not judge someone for wanting to serve decent wine with a meal at a wedding instead of cheap gut rot. For some reason on mumsnet, as with that other coffee thread, there is definitely a lot of inverse snobbery going on whereby people are met with derision for expecting a drink of a decent standard.

Good coffee certainly isn't a posh thing in Sweden, it is just generally expected.

Dp is very unusual in swede in that he doesn't drink coffee, his family finds it highly amusing that he doesn'tdrink coffee but despite his non coffee drinking status he owned a reasonably smart coffee machine even before I moved in with him.

Our church does coffee for 200 every sunday.

They make the coffee before the service in a large coffee machine, and put it in large thermos flasks, and then serve it after the service.

It is apparently very nice. So could you borrow similar mahcine/thermos and get someone to make it up for you?

I'm Swedish and I drink about 7-8 mugs off coffee daily. If it's a lengthy occasion people will get caffein abstinence and headaches! They'll be grumpy too..:-))

Are Swedish weddings like German weddings in that guests give gifts of experiences during the day (like a photo booth, guest book, balloon release, poem, other random sentimental crap)?

If so, why not ask someone to give you the gift of acting as official coffee brewer?