To write myself off at 30?

[Pyjamaramadrama]

I'm in a crappy horrible relationship with a man who treats me like shit at least 50% of the time.

I have a lovely little boy of 6 and I just don't see myself ever meeting anyone else.

I realise that this may sound ridiculous, but my relationship has worn me down do much and I don't even trust my own instincts anymore.

I don't ever believe that I will meet anyone else and be happy.

I'm not afraid to be alone but I didn't really think I'd be in this situation now.

Mate, you're only 30! I can see that your relationship has ground you down (so consider posting in relationships to help give you the strength to sort it out).

But love, take it from me - ancient old bag of over 40 - 30 is the prime of your life, please don't give up now. You have years and years of joy, fun and love ahead of you if you can get rid of the fuckwit that is making you so unhappy.

You are being unreasonable.

Ditch this man now. By yourself (with your child) you will be so much better. Do NOT under any circumstances write yourself off, you are a mother (the world's toughest and most essential role) and no doubt many other things that I don't know. Get out and get better. Things will get better.

Do you have any friend or relative to turn to now?

Didn't want to read and run.

You sound sad and frustrated and I'm sorry for that, it cannot be easy being in that situation.

However there is no benefit, for you or for your lovely DS, in accepting that someone who is meant to love you can treat you like shit so consistently.

Thirty is no age, you're really young, there is every chance someone infinitely better is out there for you. And even if not, can you contemplate receiving this treatment for the next forty years?

Just my view but I believe it is better to be alone than badly accompanied.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Don't be daft! I was divorced at 32, and went on to meet and have DS at 38.

I'm single again now, have been for the last few years, now aged 46, far more entitled to write myself off than you are lovey!

That said, i'm still clinging on to hope that I don't have to write myself off just yet

:)

The sooner you end your unhappy relationship, the sooner hope will enter you life.

This will be the best decision you make for yourself and for your ds! I promise!

My sister met the love of her life at 35
But you'll be unlikely to meet someone else while in a relationship with this tosser. Think you need to take a deep breath & dump this guy, scary but you can do it.
Your whole life is ahead of you, if you can't do it for yourself do it for your son - he deserves to have a happy mum & you deserve to be happy

I realise how stupid it probably sounds just right now I feel so downtrodden.

I know that being alone is better than being with someone who drags you down.

Pyjamaramadrama, don't beat yourself up about it. It's enormously difficult to end a crappy relationship when you have been emotionally beaten down for years. However people do it all the time and although it may be hard I bet not one of those women who get out of a shitty relationship regret it.

Really 30 is not the age to write yourself off. As I see it you can continue feeling hopeless and shit, trying to make the best of living with a useless waste of space dickhead. Or you can make some major changes, grab life by the bollocks and get out and have some fun.

Out of interest when was the last time you really had a good laugh?

Yes you are! As someone has already said, you're in your prime. Ditch the arse, get yourself a better life, improve your self esteem and you'll be be much better off.

I ditched my horrible ex at 32, met my wonderful DH at 34, and at just under 39 I'm sitting in bed nursing our 5 week old DS. I had my moments of doubt, but it was somworth taking the chance!

You need to give yourself the chance to turn your life around or you'll be having the same conversation with yourself in 10 years time, when you could be as happy as I am right now. I know what I'd recommend!

I'm nearly 50 and honestly I didn't really feel my life properly started till I was 30!

If there's one thing I could say to my younger self it would be, don't waste your precious time with someone who isn't worthy of you.

You are so much better than this and you could have a great life, you need to take a deep breath and trust that life will get better. It will but you need to take action and believe in yourself.

Life sometimes is about reinventing yourself and this sounds like one of those moments. There's loads of support for you on here if you want it.

Don't give up!

4 years after my mum died my 87 year old dad has a "friend" girlfriend who he hangs out with, goes to dinner with and has holidays with.

So on that basis you have another 57 years to meet someone!

I used to think like that at 30. Its a weird age, and you think you're old and need to be settled. But actually, you're dead young and have lots of amazing [young] years ahead of you. Ditch the loser and move on to be happy.