Selling donated items

[lbsjob87]

I'm just looking to gauge opinion on what people think is reasonable to do with baby items you've had donated.
My DS is 3 weeks old, and was a bit early, so quite small at birth (6lb 5oz). He's the first grandson in the family but my brother and his wife are expecting a boy in September (they have two girls at the mo).
My issue is, as the boys will be 3 months apart, it's kind of assumed by my mum, brother and sis in law that I will automatically hand down his clothes as he grows out of them. Most are new and some were quite expensive.
Usually I would, their son will be my nephew and we're not having any more kids so I won't need them.
But I know full well that when they are done with them, they will sell them on and keep the money (I know this because they did it with the stuff my SiL's sister gave her for her girls).
They can't see a problem with it, as far as they're concerned if you are given something it's yours to do what you want with.
I can't say "You can have them but if you sell them can you share the money?" as they don't see why they should.
My theory is that if someone has been kind enough to give you something, it's not really on to sell it on for your own gain without asking.
I tend to hand things on or give them to charity.
What do people think? AIBU to not want to hand the stuff down for that reason or would you do the same and sell the stuff on?

"We were planning to sell the clothes, you can have the vests if you like but I'm sure we can come to some arrangement over the clothes, I was thinking a pound or two an item" then you can do a deal to $ake you look ultra reasonable selling supermarket clothes at 50p and designer clothes at a couple of pounds!

Your baby is 3 weeks old. You may think differently about having another child a little way down the line. I did. Couldn't, but tried.

It's your possessions. If they want to have hand-me-downs for their son, even though the boys may be in the same size at the same time, or their son may be in a larger size - then ask for them to 50% share at time of purchase and your son will wear them first, then they can have them a few months later.

Otherwise, the clothes belong to you and you can do with them what you want. You've given them to a friend - no need to explain further. If pushed, but you don not need to account for yourselves, say that you preferred to give them away to someone who would use and then pass it on rather than sell them. Why should your family subsidise theirs?

You know, there is a possibility that their son may soon outgrow yours - my two eldest were a year apart but the youngest was as large as the eldest at two years! So, it might be your SiL who is passing stuff on to you... .

YANBU, your clothes, keep them to do as you please with.

I would not loan them to people like your DB and SIL.

I have a rule. If I'm given something, i'll give it away but if I bought it, I'll sell it.

You may find their 3 month old is bigger then your 6 month old.

Or tell them before/after you have sold stuff and explain you wanted to recoup the cost and put it in your DC's savings account.

Just give them a small bag of cheap less nice stuff as a good will gesture. Sell the rest to recoup costs and put it in a savings account for DS. That's totally legitimate and acceptable reason to sell stuff yourself. .

Lie and say you need them back for your friend who is pregnant

Haven't read the comments but cannot stand people selling on donated stuff.

They should donate them once they're done instead of being selfish and greedy.

Grrrrr

Could you say you were planning on selling or donating the items to charity but if they would like them they are welcome to them either at cheaper than going rate when they receive or they can have and you get % of profit or they give away and you won't ask for anything.

are they likely to keep sales from you if you ask this of them?

Keep them for the 'next baby'.

Thanks guys, I did think it was out of order but wasn't sure if I was being overprotective over things that are going to be no use to me before very long.
But it turns out that it's not just me who thinks that, so they can swing for it and buy their own stuff like we have had to, and I won't feel bad for not handing stuff over!

When our DCs were little, my sister used to pass on outgrown items on a regular basis, for which we were very grateful. When our DCs outgrew these, we passed them on, to charity shops if if they were still wearable, for recycling otherwise. I don't think it ever crossed our minds to actually sell them. I still remember DS arriving with a dozen faded but still serviceable blue vests that her then ten-year-old son had recently outgrown - I never did work out why an only child came to possess so many vests all the same size, but I hadn't the heart to tell her that our own DCs never wore vests, so took them graciously and sent them to the next jumble-sale.

If you can afford to pass them on rather than have to sell them yourself, I don't see an issue in them selling the clothes tbh. If their child hasn't worn them then it would be good manners to give you a share of the profits, but when you have given something as gift, you cannot control what the recipient then does with it.

Get a keepsake quilt or bear made from them. No arguments then.
There are loads of sites selling them.

lovekeepcreate.co.uk

www.made4keepsake.co.uk/g/1253422/keepsake-bears.html