To be pissed off that my mum hasn't bothered to contact me for weeks?

[PatchyNora]

Ok so I tend to call my mum every other day or so, if I don't she moans that I never call her or that I'm obviously in a mood etc etc.

I got home from a weekend away 3 weeks ago, called her when I got back. Everything was fine and then I lost her number some how (she'd recently moved so I didn't know it off hand) and I thought "oh well, I'll just wait for her to call me.

That was 3 weeks ago and not a word. As I say I normally call her numerous times a week. Her excuse for not calling me is "oh I didn't call as I didn't know if you'd be at work" what a fucking stupid thing to say. If I don't answer the phone, maybe I'm out eh? that might be a clue.

Anyway like I said, 3 weeks and no word. Do I hold out for her to call me or yet again, make the effort and ring around family to get her number again?

As you have been calling all the time, she expects it.
Expects you to do all the calling.
I'd leave it.

Maybe she "lost" your number too.

I hope she is ok.
On a lighter note - lucky you- mine calls me constantly - she's lonely and has 'free minutes' on her phone. Drives my siblings and I up the walls !

this is exactly what my DM would do - my DB and I joke that her phone must only take incoming calls because she never picks up the phone to call. Then if you miss a few days you she gets all sulky and passive aggressive

You are in for the bollocking of your life when you eventually phone!

I'd leave it, myself. I realised at New Year that I was ding the same - calling my mum at least once per week to check she was OK, have a chat etc. So I stopped, and she has called me three times. Three.

She did ask me why i hadn't called her - I turned it into a joke, saying the phones work both ways. She didn't really have a reply!

Leave her to call OP. TBH, my parent's haven't called me in over 3 years and I've become fed up of doing all the work. It can end up breeding resentment when you're doing all the calling. Especially when you know that they are capable of calling you.

One problem is when they don't call, it can make you think that they don't care enough to even lift the phone. You can go over things wondering if you've done something to upset them or if they've fallen out with you over something.

We moved 350 miles to where we are now and so that mum and dad could see their DGC. They haven't bothered their arse to even phone to see how they are doing. If they can't be arsed to ring us, ask about the DC and what's happening in our lives, then I'm not ringing to tell them. We're thinking of moving back to the town we previously lived in because none of my siblings or parents visit or ring us. This is on the advice of a good friend who knows my situation with my parents and siblings. Just remember that it takes 2 to keep a relationship going, not one slacking (without prior agreement) and the other doing all the work.

DHs parents went on holiday on easter monday, phoned once while they were there in late May for ds's birthday, and have now been back two weeks and still haven't phoned
We can't call them when they are away as they don't have a landline and have never given us the number for the overseas mobile. They don't email or skype.
This time we decided to wait for them to contact and see how long it took. Though at this rate, they'll be off again before then

Regarding my last sentence, I meant that both parties need to make equal effort or one side will end up resenting the lack of effort from the other side.

My mum last rang me in February, for my birthday. ..

My mum never calls me. I call home occasionally but have got to the point where I can't be bothered any more.

I know they love and care about me and I know if I called them and asked for help, they would be with me as soon as they can but they never call me!

I did an experiment about 12 years ago, until then I called them every other Sunday, if I didn't call they would wait until I did, they wouldn't call to check how I was! So I thought I would just see how long it took. 12 weeks! 3 bloody months! And it was my dad who called and asked what I was upset about!

Yes, I really pisses me off but I've come to terms with it now. Recently I lost my partner, I called and text him for 8 hours and now if someone doesn't answer the phone straight away or text me back within a few hours, I think they are dead! My parents rarely answer the phone so it saves me a panic attack if I don't call!