To feel like walking out the door?

[Anilec]

This was my Sunday:

Up at 7am after a terrible night's sleep, with DS1 (4) coming into our bed, me decamping to DS1's bed for all of five minutes before he tracked me down.
Both kids up, fed, washed, dressed, entertained.
Kitchen tidied, dishwasher emptied.
First load of washing on.
Sheets on all four beds changed.
Washing hung out on line.
Bathroom and understairs loo cleaned.
Lunch made.
Second load of washing on.
Tidy up.
Write word count for day (more so, in fact). I am a writer and my sole income supports the family.
Buy Christmas present for DS2 in Argos sale.
Text DH who has taken the boys out so I can write, because I want to see what time they are coming home so I know when to cook. No answer.
After working all FUCKING DAY I walk down to village to get paper and get out of the house I haven't left all day.
Get home 20 mins later to find DH and kids home.

DH says to me "Don't you think you should have started dinner earlier?"
I say "I texted to find out when you would be home."
DH: "Well it's hardly time sensitive is it? You could have just cooked it this afternoon."

DH's day:

Lie-in until 10.30am
Watch the cricket
Take boys to adventure fun park with friends for 3 hours. This is apparently a massive favour for me despite the fact that if I can't write, we don't earn any fucking money!
Watch the football.

Big row ensues. I asked him, at some point during the day, that as I had been doing housework all morning, that it would be good if he could mop the bathroom and kitchen floor. Cue much eye-rolling but he said he'd do it. I bring this up again in the row and he said - and this is a direct quote - "I didn't expect that you'd want me to do it today - or tomorrow. I'll do it at a time that's convenient for myself." Apparently I am massively overreacting. Am I?

So, AIBU to do precisely nothing from now on in and when challenged by DH to say, "well, I was going to do it, just at a time convenient to myself."

In case it's not obvious, I am so ANGRY. I wouldn't have said we have an unequal relationship. He's always done a lot of the childcare and the cooking. Perhaps it's being the wage earner that's getting to me - that and having to be responsible for pretty much everything else.

I agree, the person who works for money should be supported by the other person in terms of household work. Your job, despite being done from home, should be treated just like a job where you leave in the morning and come back in the evening. Have a 'closed-door policy' when you're working at home (if you have a separate dedicated work room); closed from the outside to other people and also closed to you i.e. you cannot be expected to just leave your desk and go and cook or clean at any point during your working day.

And leisure time should be calculated and you should both end up with about the same amount of time to yourselves.

Just wanted to update you (I get so frustrated with threads where the original OP just buggers off...)

Once I'd calmed down DH and I had a good talk and he agreed that it was totally unfair that I did 75% of the housework. We agreed to divvy up the chores a bit more fairly. He also cleaned the kitchen :) I should also mention that he's about to start retraining in a new profession so hopefully the income-earning will not be solely down to me in the near future.

Thanks also to those who suggested getting out of the house to write. Certainly something I'll be considering these school holidays!

Good update, OP, and thanks for coming back. Hope things continue to get better.