To make a complaint about this staff member

[scottishegg]

Hi a bit of background my 3 year old dd's nursery was closed suddenly a couple of months back due to a serious complaint made against a member of staff due to the fact that there was no plans to reopen the nursery in the near future and because my dd loves being around other children myself and a close friend decided to enrol our children at another local nursery.

After visiting the nursery we decided to start out children there 3 afternoons a week, the only issue I had was the deputy manager was one of my neighbours who stopped speaking to me a few years back for a reason I have never worked out but to me this wasn't a big deal as this lady was never a friend and I assumed she would be professional

Anyone my dd started at the nursery and I was told by the manager that she had settled in really well and there were no issues with her at all.
However everytime the deputy manager has done the drop offs when the manager isn't there she has been very negative about my daughter from pretty much day one she has said she is a bully doesn't know how to share, controls her close friend etc etc.

I know my daughter can be a bit willful and I know she's not perfect I'm the first one to say this but I have never had any issues with her behaviour before her previous nursery said she was a diamond. And some of the things she is saying doesn't ring true to my friend either who is as shocked as I am by the way my dd has been portrayed.

I have never complained before and don't like to do it but I'm very unhappy with this lady's negativity particularly when the manager doesn't share her concerns.

Like I said previously I am not one of those parents who's children can do no wrong I am normally the first to admit their faults but this lady's negativity has really thrown me, should I complain?

I would want a meeting to address this.

I would state unemoti

Do any 3 year olds know how to share properly. And arnt they all a but wilful etc.

Sounds like this member if staff is in the wrong job.

Sorry, unemotionally that you think her attitudes towards your DD is being influenced by your previous history.

Bring up that her reports are in complete contrast to other staff members, so if she's right, it means they are wrongly not picking up on issues.

You need the meeting to find out which it is (btw).

If she is overly negative then this should be being picked up on anyway.

Do you and her have older DC of a similar age who go out to play?

I am asking this because her reason for not talking to you may be she perceived your child to be bullying hers, now she 'sees' the same in your younger one.

Definitely a meeting situation, it cannot continue (even if I am wrong).

No childcare professional should be so unremittingly negative about a child. Actually they shouldn't be negative AT ALL. I would speak to the manager about this but leave your past history out of it.

No this lady is in her 50's and has grandchildren but myself or my children have never socialised with her at all. I don't know the reason I was removed from her Xmas card list and because she was only a neighbour not a friend I never bothered to find out!

Is the deputy manager her Keyworker? If not, tell her you don't wish to discuss your dd with anyone other than her key worker and the Manager.

Then organise a meeting with her keyworker, in the email or letter organising the meeting, outline the concerns the DM has raised, saying you are concerned that these issues have not been raised ever by the keyworker,and that they are being raised in an inappropriate manner, (presumably not privately but in a public space where other parents and children can hear her comment). Suggest that this inappropriate and that it has caused you to have serious concerns about their ability to a) manage any issues b) communicate these issues and c) discuss these issues in a confidential and appropriate manner. If your dds keyworker does not agree with these daily off the cuff comments made in front of other parents,children and workers, say you will escalate this to both the manager and the owner of the nursery. the LA and Ofsted as the DM clearly has issues that would benefit from some further training in key areas affecting her performance both as a manager and a child care professional. If the keyworker does agree with these comments, you will still escalate the issues surrounding the DMs inappropriate behaviour, the key workers lack of communication and the manager's inability to manage her subordinate unprofessionalism.

cc the Manager.

That should just about cover it.

TBH I would have found out what her problem was, before enrolling your DD at 'her' nursery.

I would ask for a meeting with her, the manager and yourself, and explain that although you were aware she had an issue, you didn't think it would spill over into her professional life. It obviously is, so could you sort it out there and then.

Brilliant thanks and forgot to say she is her keyworker and she does make these complaints in front of other parents including my friend who's child she says is controlled and bullied by my dd.

Right email goes straight to the manager, amended to reflect her failings as a keyworker, a childcare professional and the DM of the nursery.

at the very least insist that she has a different key worker as your faith in the relationship has broken down.