AIBU to wear black to a wedding?

[Silvercatowner]

I have absolutely no idea about these things….

[MsVenus]

I was going to wear a black silk sari with gold embroidery at my cousins wedding....now maybe I shouldn't?!

[Pobblewhohasnotoes]

YANBU. As long as you don't look like you're going to a funeral it's fine. Get some coloured accessories or some bright shoes.

[EBearhug]

As long as you don't look like you're going to a funeral it's fine.

This.

If you do look like you're in full mourning, then it's unreasonable, but black with bright and/or sparkly bits to break it up, should be fine.

[whydidyoudothat]

I have worn black to a wedding, certainly didn't look like I was going to a funeral. My mil on the other hand wore black to our wedding, complete with black hat with downturned brim. There is a shot of her during the ceremony, she doesn't look very happy. She abosolutely looks like she is at a funeral.

[FredFlintstonesSister]

My bridesmaids wore black to my wedding! I thought it looked very tasteful... I often wear a LBD to weddings, just add colour with shoes, bag etc.

[ChaosK]

I wore a black suit and hat to a wedding - and I was the bride!!!
My MiL nearly had a heart attack! I never wanted a white dress - can't see the point in all the fuss - simply isn't me! We had a super day.

[ParadoxicalCat]

Oh dear, I had never heard the green thing before. Last wedding I went to I wore glorious green, but it was the wedding of an ex-bf's ex-gf. I hope she didn't take it the wrong way :(

[CanaryYellow]

As long as you're not sobbing or hissing "it should have been me" then black will be fine.

[MissHC]

Personally I wouldn't wear black. I've not often seen other guests wear it either. Never heard of green being bad luck though.

[SteeleyeSpanx]

TBH, I probably wouldn't, of all the other colours you could choose, why would you?

[GlaikitFizzog]

My sister wore black as did a few guests and the kilts for the bridal party were mostly black with gold.

Hell even two girls wore white dresses, they did check first it was ok! No biggie really!

[Pugaboo]

I wouldn't, not to a daytime summer wedding especially. Black looks drab on most people.

[MrsMook]

It's Ok if it's jazzed up with colour. Plain black is too funeral, or work wear.

[Bue]

I go to a lot of weddings. Black is a completely standard colour for female guests these days (and has been for nigh on twenty years).

[ARightOldPickle]

Mother of the bride twice, first time wore black dress and hat, but snazzed it up with a pale pink jacket and shoes. Second time really broke the rules - ivory (linen shift) dress, black bolero and black hat. Brides came dress shopping with me and encouraged me to go for it though!

But having been to a few weddings over recent years most things seem to go these days, as long as people aren't wearing something that could be mistaken for a wedding dress I can't see the problem. The people who annoy me are the ones who look like they haven't bothered at all, seen a few guests in scruffy jeans and tee shirts...

[Silvercatowner]

I would feel much happier in jeans and a tee shirt. Whilst recognising I'm completely out of step, I honestly don't understand the hooha about dressing up. Its excruciating.

[fluffymouse]

Yabu unless the invite or bride has specifically said that black is acceptable. Wearing black otherwise would be unspeakably rude, unless this is an orthodox Jewish wedding?

[GlaikitFizzog]

But fluffy, it would have never crossed my mind to list acceptable colours on my invite. Icouldnt give a shiny shit what colour my guests wore tbh. So if Op was coming to my wedding black would be no problem. What is rude is turning up and criticising other guests attire or photo bombing the group shots.

I would want all my guests to be comfortable,not cow-towing to old fashioned wedding ettiquette. "Traditional" weddings are outdated nowadays. White was worn by the bride to convey her virginity. Granted some people do wait until they are married, however I believe the majority of brides in the UK are not Virgin on their wedding days. More and more weddings are not religious as that is the way things are going.

[fluffymouse]

Glaik some invites do have acceptable colours and dress codes.

If there is nothing mentioned in the invite it is not acceptable to wear white or black unless okayed by the bride.

You may not be traditional, but a lot of people do have traditional views on these matters. Black is a colour associated with morning, and can be seen as a snub.

[Pobblewhohasnotoes]

I think it's rude to dictate a dress code.

I'm perfectly capable of dressing appropriately for a wedding. And as guests you often spend a fortune on travel accommodation and a gift without the cheek of being made to buy a whole new outfit on top.

[TweeAintMee]

fluffy - doesn't that presuppose that everyone knows the unwritten rules? I have worn black to weddings and given a carving knife from the wedding list - both are apparently 'not done' in the eyes of some, but if the behaviour is totally unwitting and well-intentioned, why take offence?

[SteeleyeSpanx]

To those people saying they wouldn't care, fine - you are either unaware of, or choose not to follow accepted etiquette.

However, it is quite unreasonable to think that, just because you have taken up this position (outside of the norm) that everybody else should join you, and indeed imply that they are the unreasonable ones for not doing so.

[SteeleyeSpanx]

Really twee?

Interesting. I just assumed that everyone knew wearing black to a wedding was a bit 'off'

I just hate this mentality of "I have chosen to abandon so therefore you should too.

I see it all the time at the moment (esp wrt Thank You cards) and it really bothers me....

Perhaps I need to get out more

[MrsDavidBowie]

I would wear black.