AIBU to wear black to a wedding?

[Silvercatowner]

I have absolutely no idea about these things….

[ThirteenMeetings]

I went to a wedding where the mother of the groom wore black. She's not a dressy woman, and it was her favourite smart 'go to' dress and she just wanted to feel comfortable. I'm sure a few people commented (like me, now!) but it was pretty obvious nothing was meant by it.

I might wear black to a wedding, but I would probably bling it up so it didn't look depressing. I did wear a cream dress to a wedding once, but it was short and I wore it with bright blue shoes and blue handbag.

[Thumbwitch]

I've worn a black dress to a wedding before, as it was my smartest summer dress and it was boiling hot. But I had a short sleeved pale green jacket to go with it for the church part; dispensed with it for the party afterwards.

I think it's fine to wear black (unless you're the MIL! ) but better to leaven it with some colour somewhere as well.

[SquigglySquid]

Hmm.. Yup, just went back through all my old wedding photos. Plenty of people wearing black at my wedding. Some people even wore green. But really, if you asked me even at the end of the night what anyone wore to my wedding, I would have given you a blank stare. Unless it's a huge faux pas to the bride to wear black at her wedding, she won't even notice your outfit.

[SquigglySquid]

As a guest, you can wear whatever you want as long as it's nice. I've worn black to plenty of weddings because I look good in it. No one's ever given me looks. But I'm also from the US, so it could be different rules.

[Happy36]

Can you snoop on Facebook at photos of the other guests at recent weddings?

[RaspberryRuffle]

No I would not wear black to a wedding. Or white, or cream, although I have worn green.
My cousin wore a cream lacy dress to another cousin's wedding, I was really surprised her mum hadn't said anything when she saw the dress. It was a tad short to be a wedding dress but in an 'upper body' photo it did look 'bridal'.

[MrsKoala]

I distinctly remember 3 cousins of exH at my first wedding - one wore head to toe black and the other 2 head to toe pure white. Lots of people commented. It looked quite odd and i was surprised that anyone would not realise it wasn't quite the done thing. Altho i must say the white looked way worse than the black.

I also remember at work once a colleague saying she was going to a wedding and had bought this full white number. I pointed out that it might be considered a bit off to wear it, but she was very dismissive and said 'it's a wedding, you're supposed to wear white...' Umm only if you're the bride

[wtffgs]

I have no idea what colours people wore to my wedding (apart from the bridesmaids to whom I would like to apologise ) Do people really care about this stuff "No Green" How about (addressed to either Bride or Groom) "Please dissuade me if my intended is a wankferret!"

[Nanny0gg]

I think it might be a bit unusual if you were the mother of the bride/groom, but otherwise I'd say it's fine.

Oops...

[lljkk]

I got married 12 yrs ago, day time wedding in a sunny place.

Lots wore black! Quite surprised me. Wouldn't now.

My aunt put her bridesmaids in black & red. But that was an evening wedding which is unusual in our culture. Seemed elegant & avant gard, not depressing.

[MrsKoala]

at I loved my outfit and felt comfortable. That's the main thing surely ? ummm not really no. You loving your outfit and feeling comfortable is not remotely what the main thing about a wedding is about. A lot of times it's about tradition, ceremony and the etiquette that says you appreciate the importance of occasion. Otherwise people would just wear an old track suit or something if they wanted - after all it's all about them isn't it??

[Waltonswatcher]

I've worn a white dress with black accessories - a wonderful huge black hat .
I loved my outfit and felt comfortable . That's the main thing surely ?
At my own wedding I wanted no posh , best clothes . I didn't want men in suits and women feeling the need to splash a load of cash .
I myself wore an old dress and it was navy . It's the commitment that counts , not all the boring rules and regalia.

[TweeAintMee]

Steeleye - no offence taken but very nice of you. :)
awsomer has probably got it right really.

[awsomer]

OP you need to think more about how the bride/groom will feel about it. It doesn't matter how people on MN respond if the bride is going to take it badly! They're your friends/family, do you think they'll mind or not?

[SteeleyeSpanx]

Fair enough twee apologies if I offended

I am currently smarting from a particularly epic etiquette fail on the part of a 'friend' so perhaps a bit oversensitive on this subject at the moment.

[Pobblewhohasnotoes]

I can't remember what guests wore to my wedding. If anyone did wear black I certainly didn't notice. I think some people over think things.

[MrsKoala]

Personally i think all black is rude to wear to a wedding. If it's black and another colour then fine. I wouldn't wear all black to anything but a funeral and a very dressy cocktail party and I doubt i'd wear it with any 'colour' other than white (not that either is actually a colour really). (i'm not a fan of black really and i think it looks crap on most people tbh - i just don't understand why it's so popular).

I wore red to my last wedding. I fancy blue for the next one

[RuddyDuck]

Quite amazing that sone peoole have so little confidence in their partner that they think the success or otherwise of their marriage might be determined by the fact that a guest wore green.....

My wedding dress was green. We've been married more than 20 years. Cant remember if sny guests wore black at our wedding but it wouldn't have bothered me if they had,

[SconeRhymesWithGone]

I would be more likely to wear black to a wedding than to a funeral. But I am in the US and most of the weddings I have attended are in the evening and many are black tie so women are in cocktail attire. There is a lot of black.

My daughter's bridesmaids dresses were black.

[mathanxiety]

It would be completely acceptable for every occasion I might find myself at (US) including weddings. Very few funerals or wakes I have been to feature people dressed in black -- I would be much more likely to find women in black at weddings actually.

[Jelliebabe2]

It's supposed to be bad as you would wear all black to a funeral. So I wouldn't wear just black but team it with a colour. In America it's quite popular as a colour for a bridesmaid dress but they also tend to have a more black tie event. I wouldn't do it. White would be very rude too!

[PaintedLady2014]

I got married in black!

I also wore bright red to my mum's funeral. She always said she didn't want people wearing black and red was her fave colour.

[TweeAintMee]

SteelyEye - genuinely I have never heard of the rules mentioned here and I'm actually quite a stickler for social etiquette. e.g. Thank you letters every time in this house (pref 1.5 sides), as soon as a child can write. To me, black is an entirely neutral colour. Also, I've cast my mind back to my own wedding and cannot recall a single outfit other than my own...I was too busy to notice and far too happy just to see my friends and family sharing the occasion than to check whether protocol was observed. I might add that convention dictates that men wear a black morning suit and that women wear a hat (which I adhere to, though not in a conventional hat of course)....so I can't see why women should be colourful and men pretty much wear a uniform. It is only in the last 25 years that men have personalised outfits with a special waistcoat. As for funerals.... well, I won't be there for my own, so people can wear whatever is comfortable for them.

[cluecu]

Some of my guests wore black to my wedding and they looked fab Short of wearing an actual wedding dress I don't think any of my guests' outfits could have figured on my stress-radar, as long as they enjoyed themselves.