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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Children playing with balls

43 replies

kappadelta · 06/07/2014 15:18

I'm really not sure if I am or not. My 14 year old never hangs about on our estate. There are a few of them who get together at various homes, mine included.

Anyway last night he had a friend stop and they have just taken a ball out to go and play kurby?

A lady on the estate who I have spoken to in the past generally chit chat about the weather but also she said she had moved from her last home because of kids
has just told him and his friend to stop playing with the ball as she's trying to work and asked him where he lives.

Now DH has told me off before for being a helicopter parent being over the top in making sure the children are aware of others and understanding boundaries.

So I'm not sure if to take my son round to apologise to this woman and to tell my son never to do this again or to tell me son as long as the ball is not hitting homes, walls, gardens going onto drives that he can play where he likes?

Thanks all in advance.

OP posts:
Chocotrekkie · 06/07/2014 15:22

So he is playing on the street outside her house ? Not in her garden or bouncing it off her garage etc.

She can jog on.

If she doesn't want to be near kids she needs to move to a house in the middle of nowhere with no neighbours for miles.

I would also tell your son he should not disclose details like his address to a stranger.

Youdontneedacriminallawyer · 06/07/2014 15:23

You've stopped two boys from playing ball in the street? Why on earth would you want to do that? Its the way of the world!
If you really are concerned about the neighbours, send the boys, plus ball, down the local park.

pudcat · 06/07/2014 15:23

As long as he is hitting the kerb right outside your house and not outside her house, he should be ok. The noise can be very irritating and I do move children from outside mine. I do ask them where they live and often find that they are form the other end of the road or even the road round the corner. Their parents send them to play away from their own house as they do not like the noise.

Original poster
kappadelta · 06/07/2014 15:23

Yes Choc on the street Grin

OP posts:
pudcat · 06/07/2014 15:24

form = from

Original poster
kappadelta · 06/07/2014 15:25

Youdo - I didn't stop the boys - the lady did

OP posts:
Original poster
kappadelta · 06/07/2014 15:29

Pud - I don't have a kurb

OP posts:
NeedsAsockamnesty · 06/07/2014 15:34

If you do not like children playing outside your house on a public area then you should move to somewhere children do not live.

Why would you even consider making your child apologise when he has done nothing wrong.

(Assuming he was on a public area that does not have a no ball games sign)

pudcat · 06/07/2014 15:34

oh ok kappa. The noise of the ball banging against a kerb is really dreadful. It seems to vibrate throughout the house, even if it is a couple of houses away. Is there a kerb with no houses they could use?

pudcat · 06/07/2014 15:36

If you do not like children playing outside your house on a public area then you should move to somewhere children do not live. If their parents do not like them playing football outside their own house why should it be alright for them to disturb me?

Original poster
kappadelta · 06/07/2014 15:39

Pudcat - we live on a new estate barely footpaths lol. Anyway he's in now and his friend has gone home. It was the first time they had been out with a ball in the 18 months we've lived here.
I'm sure he won't have been the first child to receive an earful as the estate is full of children Grin

OP posts:
MexicanSpringtime · 06/07/2014 15:42

Having lived in a part of town where the children only had unhealthy activities, like stealing cars, smashing windows and throwing eggs at old people, I hate it when people stop children playing a game of ball. We didn't dare say anything to the brats who were making our lives a misery.

I8toys · 06/07/2014 15:46

FFS its like we never had a childhood and did these things. So intolerant of others these days. If kids didn't have ipads and computer games they would all be out on the street riding bikes (god forbid) and playing postman's knock (hanging offence).

pudcat · 06/07/2014 15:48

I can see it from both sides kappa. Estates should have safe play areas in them. Ours has only 1 tiny bit of green which backs onto the next road, so those residents don't like it. The kids used to be able to use the college field up the road (older ones all took care of younger ones), but that has all been built on now, or fenced off.

ICanSeeTheSun · 06/07/2014 15:49

Let kids be kids.

I did worse as a child than play curb ball.

5madthings · 06/07/2014 15:50

Fgs she told them off for playing kerby!

I loved playing that as a kid!

The madthings play it in our cul de sac with the neighbours kids and I have been known to have a go as well.
Were they right out the front of her house?

YouSayBelloISayPoppaye · 06/07/2014 15:55

I never understood the annoyance of Kurby as a kid, however now I have my own home and drive I am so sorry for being a pain back then.

Their are about 7 girls down my road ageing between 12 and 19 they stand on the street corner which is attached to a main road playing kurby when cars park all down one side. The ball lands in the road, they run into the road to get the ball, you drive round the corner and you have to stop because they're chucking the ball or running to get it.

In fact everyone down our street has complained due to this and the fact they sit in the road/sit with their feet in the road on the bend

Maybe ask your DS to play with it outside your house so It isn't annoying anyone else

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 06/07/2014 16:04

Do they know how to play Knock down Ginger? (Kidding, kidding)
She sounds like a joy. If they weren't outside her house or being overly noisy, then she is bu. I would go and have a chat, set out ground rules, but be firm and say that as long as they aren't being unacceptably disruptive then they can play out, but between certain hours. Can they not play in your garden?

Original poster
kappadelta · 06/07/2014 16:18

The game they were playing was kurby so they needed a a kurb/curb. It wasn't outside her house it was to the side of the unoccupied show home which is about 20 feet from her house.

We don't have a curb our house lead onto a private shared drive which the estate kids love to fly up and down on bikes and scooter because it's so flat Grin

OP posts:
Wellwellwell3holesintheground · 06/07/2014 16:24

Kurb/curb = kerb

I think she was being unreasonable but without seeing how close to her house it was it's hard to say. Surely a tennis ball can't be that loud?

I8toys · 06/07/2014 16:25

Bet she hates bikes and scooters too! Some people just want to complain about everything! Nothing you can do.

Original poster
kappadelta · 06/07/2014 16:30

Wellwell thanks for that I had a mental block lol.
The boys were playing 20 feet from her house.

OP posts:
ArmyDad · 06/07/2014 16:33

Some people are just miserable bastards. Do they also complain at passers by/cars or any other noise that may happen?

I had this when I was young, my mates and I would play football with a sponge ball and one guy on the corner would complain about the noise, the damage we were doing to his property (we stayed well away from his house) pretty much anything.

Let your kids play, get this person some ear defenders.

Original poster
kappadelta · 06/07/2014 16:35

She's in a lucky situation at the moment. There is only the Showhome whose garden backs onto hers but people will be moving in December and they have children. Who might play and make noise in their garden.

OP posts:
ArmyDad · 06/07/2014 16:36

Oh forgot to add, the kids probably played there as it was the most suitable kerb i.e. no cars drives safe etc.