To put something DD doesn't like on my nipple to wean her off BM?

[ShineSmile]

DD is a breast monster. She wants a feed every hour during the day, unless we are out on an activity, and every 2 hours at night. She is 13 months. She doesn't drink milk but I have a calcium and other vitamins covered (we see a dietician due to allergies).

I want to wean her off the breast. I have no idea how I will manage to do that, unless I put her really off the breast. I was thinking of placing the vitamin drops she hates on my nipple. Is that too cruel? And more importantly will it work?

I did use nail biting liquid on my nipples to stop dd, but she was 2 1/2 by then and I had been put on a strong medication that was not compatible with bf, so it was imperative that she stop. I checked it was safe, told dd that mummy was poorly and on medicine that made the milk 'go yukky', but when she was not convinced I did let her just have a tiny taste, which put her off instantly!
I would agree with a younger child where stopping isn't essential, something gentler would be preferable....agree to try kellymom.

Do you have a local la leche league group or similar you can go to? I think they would be a good place to go to get informed support to help you wean.

Fwiw, my dd was similar at that age, but is down to three feeds a day now at 2 yo, it is a gradual process but feasible to cut down!

I would speak to the dietician before making any changes to her diet.

Just to add we only finally cut out the last daytime feed when dd started nursery and there was no physical way she could bf.

I night weaned ds ( as gently as I possibly could) at 13 months and he started sleeping through the night.

Is there a food she loves? Ds adores pasta so I'd give him pasta for dinner and he'd eat tons so I knew he wasn't hungry. If she only loves breastmilk you could pump and offer her a bottle when she wakes, if she is hungry she'll take the bottle but if she just wants comfort she'll probably shout for boob, it only took one terrible night and ds crying for about an hour ( which was horrible for everyone) I comforted him, we co-sleep so he was still in bed with us, it felt different to be there actively comforting him to leaving him alone to cry.

At 13 months ds understood "no boobie in the bed" he'd sign boobie and all gone when sitting in bed and solemnly shake his head.

I continued to feed him in the day until he was 18 months, I'm pregnant and my milk ran out so it was quite a gradual and natural finish.

All our lives became much easier when he stopped night feeding, I had more energy to do fun outings, he was more rested sleeping through the night and dp took over bedtime routine duties and ds and dp now have a lovely cosy time at bedtime.

Jay Gordon has written about night weaning and it was mostly his ideas that we followed.

I'm not sure if nasty tasting things on your nipples would be a good idea, she may well just be as angry as if you just say no not now, but would you like a banana/to read a book or a cuddle.

My 3rd child fed very frequently and wasn't interested in solid food until she was about 14 or 15 months, then she just suddenly started eating more and feeding less. She'd feed more frequently when she was ill or teething but soon cut down again. I just went with it. It sounds as though you do want to cut down though, and I'd definitely do it slowly rather than wean abruptly.

I don't think you should let her cry but you can cuddle and comfort her without feeding. If you're happy to feed then that's fine but doesn't sound like you are?

I didn't have any time away from dc3, it just wasn't practicel but when she was about 18 months old and well established on solids I started just feeding her morning and evening. If she asked during the day, I'd say, "you can have a cuddle and a snack but no milk now".

I night weaned around 16 months but the only way we could do that was for dh to do the getting up. That was the first cutting down I did. Then I tried to limit feeds to morning, mid morning, mid afternoon and bedtime, before dropping the snack time feeds. The bedtime feed was the last to go at 25 months. My other children were quicker to take to solid food and didn't need me to limit feeds or encourage cutting down but dc3 did. babies are so different, you will get people telling you taht she doesn;t need to feed at nigth but dc3 definitely wasn't ready to night wean and I wasn't prepared to do it until it was no longer distressing for her (and imo it's easy to tell the difference between a bit of fuss and genuine distress).

Ohhhh I've been there and it was TOUGH.
HV told me she should be going 8 hours at night not every hour at 14 months. I was a red eyed zombie wreck.
DH put her to bed every night for three nights and in the night I would go in and offer her water. I didn't like to think of her thirsty.
The first night i got no sleep at all, I would pick dd up and cuddle her and offer her water and then put her back down again within 10 minutes and go back in every 5.
The second night went slightly better in that she did accept the water and then went back to sleep for an hour a time.
The third night...... She slept through! Now she sleeps through until 6 am most nights.
I feel amazing.
During the day you just have to get tough and inventive with distraction distraction distraction.

I really feel for you op, i tried to offer mine water at night instead of me, and her face, the outrage the upset the hurt....

it was too much I caved after a few seconds . I don't know how I am going to stop it, I just dont know mine is nearly two and is now pretty much co sleeping too.

Cut down on offering breastfeeding.

Drops just sounds cruel!

Thanks everyone, your advise and support is really appreciated!

Thanks to your advice, I refused to give her more than 2 feeds in the day time. She did winge a bit, but I kept distracting her and surprisingly it worked. I just hope it works tomorrow too.

How many days will it take for her to form into a habit? Basically I am only feeding her at her nap time, and bedtime and of course the 101 night feeds too. But it is still progress for us ...

advice*

I stopped the night feeds by delaying, dd would ask and I'd say 'yes just a second while I get ready' then wait till she asked again then feed her. Then next night I waited till she asked twice. then three times; then she started to fall asleep while waiting for me! now 3 weeks on she wakes turns over and goes back to sleep; no feed required!
my next challenge is getting her out my bed! not sure how yet, but one step at a time.

Sleeps, how old is your DD?

OP I was in your position a few months ago. DD was a milk monster and would throw the most unimaginable wobbly if denied. In the end there is no way around it. You will just have to say no and let the tantrum commence. Distraction might work some of the time or even a little bribery in the shape of a tiny chocolate button or two. But at the end of the day it really is just a battle of wills. You need to steel yourself and just say no. Sorry.

It took my dd less than a week to get used to the new milk routine. Good luck, OP.

Ots probably the same as my dds who were addicted to dummies. By the time i got to dummy addicted dd3 i knew i just had to take it off her and let her scream and cream and scream for it. First night was a nightmare, first day was a nightmare. Second night was so knackered she fell asleep screaming at 1am, second day she spent all day asking for it. Third night she screamed for an hr fell asleep got up and never asked for it again.

I know it's not the same, i mean the same as in breaking the habit.

let the tantrum commence. Distraction might work some of the time or even a little bribery in the shape of a tiny chocolate button or two

good idea

ILoveCoreyHaim

you see your post makes me think I shouldnt force my DD as my first was a dummy addict and with distraction when she was ready, she got over dumy in a week.

we simply did it when we went away so lots of new things to entertain her, lots of activities....

but she was ready. never asked for it, cried for it, came across a photo unexpectedly with her with it and suddenly said " dummy" with a really sad face...like a long lost friend, but quickly forgot about it.

Iam mine were all terrible for a dummy. Dd3 was by far the worst. I managed to wean dd1+2 off them early on but it didn't work with dd3. She also had younger cousins with dummies which made it worse. She was 3 when i just bit the bullet and took it. Even after i went through all of the above she hadn't got rid of them, she had 3 hidden in a pillowcase i found when stripping her bed which she was using on a night time, ive got a photo of her with it in after sending her to bed without one. She was almost 4 by this point. I chucked them and she didnt ask where they were. The hardest thing was she would take kids dummies off them. It was like an addiction with her.

Thats not very clear i took dummy at 3 but even at almost 4 i still found some hidden in her pillowcase which i can only guess she had found somewhere in the house or pincher off her cousin at grannies house

Dd1+2 i used distraction to get theres off them. One hung it on the xmas tree and the other i bribed with a toy.