To think that if you take DC to an essentially adult concert

[thirteenchickens]

you should help them behave in a reasonable fashion. i.e. if every one else is sitting, sometimes laughing, and clapping politely , your DS should not be whooping, jumping up and air punching at every opportunity? Also if audience participation is involved and we are asked to sing, your DC should not shout?

I went to a concert a few days ago and am still annoyed. It was a very mixed audience with just a few DC (my own DS included) most of whom just behaved like everyone else. But one DS (9 to 12?) behaved completely inappropriately through out, and his mum made absolutely no attempt to encourage him to modify his behaviour to the point where it was distracting for the rest of the audience and embarrassing for the performer (consumate professional though he was).

I felt sorry for the DS - he seemed completely oblivious to how every one else was behaving, in a very small hall - but surely his mother should have either helped him realise what behaviour is expected at this sort of do, or not brought him if he was for some reason unable to modify his behaviour? Bizarrely, the mother seemed to find his behaviour endearing - I think she was the only one. I went out to see a great performer and have a fun evening with my DH and DC, not to watch someone else's DC.

Incidentally the performer does plenty of shows aimed and children, and was pleased to see children in the audience at this concert.

Blimey. Fastest flounce at non nasty posts ever...?

QuizzicalCat wasn't particularly nice to op Minnie, I don't know if you read her posts fully?

Yanbu

I was so pissed off at a Lloyd Cole concert when a woman behind us and her son were mucking about and
GiGiggling etc during the performance. It didn't affect the performer, he wouldn't have noticed them, but it bloody well affected us as they were right behind us.

The woman was noisier than the kid, and was trying to make him laugh etc.

Reader, I shushed them.

They would have been asked to leave at the classical concert venue where I used to work unless it was a family friendly performance.

If the performer was pleased to see kids at the concerns, and is generally a family friendly act, it's likely that they have experienced kids and audiences of all sorts.

Op, whether or not the child has sn, you were the one who was uncomfortable. By 9-12, I would expect the child to have been socially aware of appropriate behaviour unless sn was involved, tbh.

Soooooo, we are essentially back to the age-old mn question of whether disability is okay to be seen but not heard, because you don't want it to disturb your non-disabled life.

Perhaps just have a think about the courage it takes as a family to decide whether or not to chance taking their child out in public, as they are well aware that the world is full of judgmental and ignorant people.

If you think the replies to this AIBU are nasty, and flounce so damned fast, I really don't think mn is for you.

My dad took me to a performance of Handel's Messiah when I was 3. He was impervious to the cats bum faces of the people at the box office. Apparently I sat still and behaved no problem. I would never take DS2 to something like that and he is 3, it would be a nightmare.

I think YANBU. Sounds bloody annoying!

I'm leaving out the possibility of any additional needs because the OP made no reference to it, and yes I appreciate it could be the case but without anything else to go on statistic would suggest probably not.

Stuff like this really annoys me, I'm childless but go to events which could be described as child-appropriate (this is not the same as made for children) and the only thing that annoys me more than badly behaved children are parents who refuse to address their children's behaviour. If your DC cannot sit quietly through the concern/play/show then please do not bring them and ruin it for everyone else.

OP YADNBU

By 9-12, I would expect the child to have been socially aware of appropriate behaviour unless sn was involved, tbh

Exactly. Especially as the OP has explained that he seemed completely oblivious to how every one else was behaving.

The comment "not brought him if he was for some reason unable to modify his behaviour?" shows that the OP was well aware the child may have had additional needs.

But doesn't it depend what sort of concert? It doesn't sound like he was misbehaving, just somewhat over excited with the 'whooping' when others were clapping?

I agree it's difficult to judge when you're not there, though, so I may be missing the mark, but it does sound like a case of being overly enthusiastic rather than naughty.