to be "told" that I am bi-sexual?

[WheelsOnFire1]

First of all, I do NOT take being bi-sexual in itself as an insult. Absolutely not. What I object to is this label. I will explain..

My family and I moved 150 miles away in April with DH job. Since then we haven't met many people so have been making the effort to join various clubs, go to events etc to meet people. DH and I have been attending an evening class together since May and we decided to invite the group round for some drinks.

There was only 9 of us and the topic got onto sexuality. One lady very openly said she was bi-sexual. Another lady said "I'm not homophobic at all, but even the thought of kissing another woman..." then shuddered.
The conversation continued and I made the statement that I think sexuality is fluid. Gone are the days when one is straight, gay or bi-sexual. I don't see the need for labels. I said that I am fluid with my sexuality. I have never had a sexual relationship with a woman, but I can't say that I never will. I joked that if if Jennifer Aniston wanted to kiss me, but someone was there offering me £10,000 not to...I'd reject the money.

This woman who I've met just 3 times looked at me and said "so you're bisexual?" I said "well..I don't know. I'm not attracted to women in the same way I am to men." and I went on to say how back in the day I'd snog guys in nightclubs after a few drinks but wouldn't with a girl..unless I was really plastered! And she just said "yeah but you'd kiss Jennifer Aniston, a girl wanting to kiss a girl makes you bi." She kept saying it and was basically trying to force me to say "ok ok I'm bisexual." Everyone else looked a bit uncomfortable. All of them (apart from 2 or 3 who kept quiet) agreed that having to label yourself is dumb, but she basically believed that sexuality isn't fluid: that you are straight, you are gay, or you like both sexes. She is of course entitled to her opinion but when one of the guys chimed in and said he wouldn't kick David Beckham out of bed for making crumbs, she "told" him he was bi too and "joked" asking if his wife knows he's "into men" because they could have some amazing threesomes.. (oh and bare in mind these 2 had never met before. The guy wasn't in the evening class but a work colleague of DH)

Maybe I am bi-sexual. Maybe I'm not. But AIBU to find it irritating that this woman who I barely know was trying to force me to say I am one or the other?

i think it was a bad conversation to have had as its is so easy to offend one another when it comes to something as personal as sexuality.

i think you were wrong to talk about fluidity as it comes across as minimizing her sexuality when it is obviously important to her.

she was coming at it from a different angle, you either fancy men, women or both which is it?

i don't think either of you are wrong but i would side with her personally. i am not at all attracted to women and have no desire to sleep with one or enter into a relationship with one, my sexuality isn't fluid.

i don't really see your sexuality as fluid either which was probably insulting to her. if the only way you would ever have sexual contact with a woman would be if it were jennifer anniston then that comes across as its never going to happen and you are saying it because you know its never going to happen. the same as many straight girls have girl crushes. if one of the women there looked like jennifer anniston and said right kiss me then would you have?

Interestingly I had a conversation with my DDs recently & they reckon most people of their generation will be pansexual, and more attracted to the person not the sex which is great I think.

I'm just pleased my procreation days are over and I don't have to deal with any of this confusing terminology.

YABU - not everyone is as enlightened as you, to most people you're either gay, straight, or bisexual - even gay organisations are called LGBT ( lesbian, gay, Bi, transgender ) there's no mention of 'fluid' or even bi-curious ( which is what you sound like ) - don't let someone you barely know get to you is my advice, also, most people couldn't give a f**k about orhers sexuality.

I have been in a similar situation (the outcome of which I politely declined & me and dp have a giggle about every now & then) this lady was obviously trying to convince everyone the were bisexual, perhaps she was ready to whip out a bowl for you all to put you keys in?