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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect to get out?

113 replies

Becca19962014 · 04/07/2014 21:47

My upstairs neighbour keeps her buggy, unfolded, in the access corridor. I can't get past it as I am disabled and on sticks and can't twist my body past it. I can't get to the bell and if there was an emergency can't get out.

I've been to the landlord and spoken to neighbour (neighbour was verbally abusive) but they're (both) insisting I'm being 100% unreasonable and obviously have a problem with children.

I can't move the buggy myself as I can't stand without sticks which I must hold on to. I can't climb stairs to ask them to move it and can't twist my body.

I've just come across this part of mumsnet and thought I'd ask you!

I don't understand why it's allowed. She knew about the toddler (who doesn't use the pushchair most of the time) and the steep narrow stairs, and narrow access corridor when she moved in. When her friends come round there are two or three there blocking the corridor.

Can someone explain to me why its considered to be so unreasonable to expect the access corridor (and emergency exit) to be kept clear please? I really don't understand.

OP posts:
jessplussomeonenew · 04/07/2014 22:55

It seems the biggest obstacle is that you can't let anyone in while the buggy is there, so you can't get support.

Is there any way you could lower a key out of the window to fire brigade/council when they arrive? Alternatively, is there a friendly neighbour who you would trust to hold a key, so you could arrange a time when they could let callers in for you?

DottyDooRidesAgain · 04/07/2014 23:00

Tell them you will contact the local paper and they will name and shame them for discrimination. You can always throw our key out of the window so the photography can let himself in and do a sad face Daly mail style photo.
It may prompt them o take you seriously.

Wantsunshine · 04/07/2014 23:05

This is absolutely disgusting. What type of person or now mother could be so selfish to leave her pram there blocking you to get out.

Yes, to the fire brigade idea and the Dailymail would probably like this one too.

If you cannot get out could you start phoning 101 and asking them what to do as you are stuck in your house as someone is purposefully blocking you access to get out?

GreeboOgg · 04/07/2014 23:08

Do you have anyone you can call that will help you move the buggy? Into, say, a skip?

Things do go missing if left unattended in communal areas after all

Original poster
Becca19962014 · 04/07/2014 23:12

I can't open my window, due to disability not a problem with the window.
Yes the problem is letting someone in.

I've been having a look online and came across an email address for the fire brigade so I can email them the pictures, not ideal but at least they know. Maybe I could send the pics to the landlord and copy them to the firebrigade?

The other flat in ground floor is empty. I really don't want to go giving my keys to anyone. Or having anything to do with daily mail (long story)!

OP posts:
DottyDooRidesAgain · 04/07/2014 23:18

Well e-mail the picture to the local paper with a description of the trouble you are having. Or at least tell your neighbour LL that is what you will do.

DottyDooRidesAgain · 04/07/2014 23:19

I didn't say Daily mail I said local paper with a sad Daily mail type photo.

MidniteScribbler · 04/07/2014 23:20

Do you have a friend who could come and stay for the day when the council or fire brigade are coming? They could open the door for you when they arrive.

Alternatively, I imagine there is a disability support organisation in the UK, or government department. I'm not in the UK so not sure what it is called, but I'm sure someone else can help with their contact details. They should be able to provide an advocate for you and may provide legal assistance to get something done for you.

Original poster
Becca19962014 · 04/07/2014 23:22

I've had some interesting ideas, no one has mentioned a skip yet. Though when I rang the council the first time they said get someone to dump it in the garden. Or fall on it and 'accidentally' break it (actually I did fall on it and the only thing that broke was me). Or for someone to accidentally set fire to it in the garden, actually one person sent me an email where someone had actually set fire to a pushchair in a corridor out of frustration and had ended up burning down the building.

People who have seen it have just said what's the problem I can walk past why can't you? I have got two people to move it for me both were at a loss as to why the woman finds it reasonable to leave it there, one came with me to the landlord to explain and I ended up in tears but still nothing was done apart from a 'chat' whereby she complained I was discriminating against her, as were they, and the landlord then said they couldn't do anything it was between us.

I've been googling this evening and actually it's quite surprising how many people do this, one thread was really really long as it turned into a fight with some people arguing it was okay and what they could do to ensure their rights to block access as why can't people just climb over the buggy? Shock

I have also been wondering about things like paramedics as they couldn't get past either.

I so don't need this right now. My best friend died recently and I'm really struggling with that. Normally I wouldn't post online about stuff like this I'd ask her.

OP posts:
Original poster
Becca19962014 · 04/07/2014 23:23

Dotty apologies! I should have read your reply properly! Am half asleep so I think I will call it a night for now and pop back tomorrow. Thanks for the support.

OP posts:
CallMeExhausted · 04/07/2014 23:27

I recommend the other way around - sit and carefully compose a letter (I am sure Planet Mumsnet would help your composition - we have some very persuasive writers) then email it to the fire brigade.

Ring them first - speak frankly about the issue - jot down important points you want to make before you call and then touch on them. Times, dates, attempts to resolve it on your own, the nature of your disability, the bollocks, asinine responses you have received from your LL and neighbour... then ask for an email address to send pics to as, due to the specific issue of concern you are unable to answer the door if the fire brigade visits.

When you send the pics (and CC your LL), reiterate the same points you made when you spoke to them - starting with "as we have already discussed in our telephone call at time, date" here are the photographs to help to describe the challenges I am having with access/egress from my unit".

FFS, having a toddler is a disability. I have never heard something so ridiculous.

BlackeyedSusan · 04/07/2014 23:37

ok. so can't get out past it, or roll it along? or shove it out of the way? hook it with a stick? definitely not foldable if you can 't open a window.

so phone and email are your only resources?

pester the council until they do something? Anyone there who deals with disability?

Email the firebrigade?

Are you able to get someone to get a key copied so that someone can come in and help you out.

try adult social services as you need support?

NaughtySpottyBengalCat · 04/07/2014 23:37

What a horrible situation. Short term you need the buggy moved. In the longer term you need more suitable housing, which you clearly don't have if you can't open the window :(

Fab idea from everyone 're getting the fire service to come. You will need a time when she is in to show the buggy in situ - and if she is in then surely she can answer the door? Even if there is no entry phone system, if they bang hard enough someone will answer the door or once they have arrived call the landlord to let them in (but no advance warning) If this woman is a creature of having get them to come when her friends with their buggys are blocking the exit even worse than usual.

Can you speak to any disability groups as well as shelter etc about housing? You definitely sound like you need s home designed for you to be as comfortable and safe as possible.

BlackeyedSusan · 04/07/2014 23:43

some councils offer advice. not sure how good it is. picked birmingham as an example. birmingham disability advice

grobagsforever · 04/07/2014 23:59

Does it have air tyres? That might accidentally get punctured in communal areas? Wink

Original poster
Becca19962014 · 05/07/2014 07:15

I cannot move it. The handles face the entrance door and she puts the brakes on. That makes it impossible for me to move. If it is folded I can pass if I'm on one stick but my understanding is it shouldn't be kept there at all, I guess the fire brigade could confirm that.

Social services don't want to know. Several people have contacted them, I've a lot of problems, but they don't want to know. I'm on housing list but have been told the wait will be about 20 years as there are so few suitable places. Could my contact be terminated if the LL gets really annoyed with me over this? Does anyone know?

Thank you so much for supporting me in this, it means a lot.

OP posts:
Original poster
Becca19962014 · 05/07/2014 07:17

Naughty she takes the toddler out without the buggy most of the time. So it's not necessarily the case she is in if the buggy is there.

OP posts:
BlackeyedSusan · 05/07/2014 09:10

I think if you make enough of a pest of yourself with the council the landlord and other authorities the problem will get sorted quicker. (well in an ideal world) would reporting it to 101 help as your neighbour is deliberately imprisoning you. )clutches straws) or if she is aggressive/threatening when you ask her to move it? telling them you fear for your safety.

Bouttimeforwine · 05/07/2014 09:22

Call the police everytime you want to go out. Do it often enough and they should do something.

I thought most people were decent human beings, with just a few twats. Since being on mn I realise there are a lot more of them around than I realised Sad

Bunbaker · 05/07/2014 09:32

I am so angry on your behalf. It isn't OK to discrminate against a selfish, lazy mum with a toddler, but it is OK to discriminate against someone with a disability?

Is she sleeping with the landlord?

HecatePropylaea · 05/07/2014 09:39

I agree that you should contact shelter and also the fire brigade. Also contact the disability law service www.dls.org.uk/

HecatePropylaea · 05/07/2014 09:40

www.disabilityrightsuk.org/about-us this group too

deakymom · 05/07/2014 09:48

can you get a pic of her taking the toddler out without the pushchair? i'm asking because if her reasoning is she "needs" the pushchair that shows she does not?

the fire brigade/police should have access at all times what if an ambulance was called does the building rely on the tenant being alive enough to open the door? do they not have an emergency button?

Original poster
Becca19962014 · 05/07/2014 10:10

Thanks, I will try and get pic of her going out without buggy, another good idea!

Bunbaker the problem is she considers having a toddler to be a disability so it can't be disability discrimination Shock

Having done more searching online I've found a surprising number of people think this is actually an ok thing to do Shock

OP posts:
flyingtrue · 05/07/2014 10:12

here my aunt lives, there used to be several buggies smushed into the ground floor on thrck, many notices were put and some of the elderly neighbours had real difficulty going out. The parents were all friends and ignored being told to put their buggies inside. One day there was an almighty uproar, someone-I'm guessing the grandson of one of the women who fell over one buggy and almost broke a hip- had poured rancid milk all over them.

They needed a lot of cleaning to be usable again. But they haven't done it since and the pourer was very well spoken about by the majority of the complex.

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