Driving too fast

[supersop60]

AIBU to moan at my (D)P for riding his motorbike at 90mph (even if only for 'a few seconds on a perfectly straight and empty road') with my 10YR OLD DS ON THE BACK!!!!!
He doesn't seem to think he's done anything wrong.

I remember that EssexMummy, I used to live near them :(

Ban your child from the bike. You cannot trust your partner with his safety. That would be a dealbreaker for me tbh.

I wouldn't give him another chance t act so irresponsibly. Your child is the most precious thing you have, it's just not worth the risk.

*to

How did your ds know it was 90 mph? As pillion it is generally impossible to see, that said 90 mph with no one else about on a straight road is fine with a child who can't be trusted I wouldn't.

How can one parent dictate to the other parent how to look after their child? (I'm referring not to the 90mph bit here which is clearly silly, but rather to the 'ban him from going on a bike' posters. Why? It's not illegal. You may not like it, but you can't control what the other parent does surely?

YABU. They need risk, and tbh doesn't sound too risky as experienced rider and good protective gear. Nomore risky than mine out eventing and hunting.

One parent can dictate to the other when that other is recklessly endangering the child as in this case. 90MPH on a bike is unsafe for a child riding pillion. Unless you can trust him not to do it again - and the Op can't because she knows he 'bends' boundaries then the chance for it to happen again has to be removed.

arethereanyleftatall
How can one parent dictate to the other parent how to look after their child? (I'm referring not to the 90mph bit here which is clearly silly, but rather to the 'ban him from going on a bike' posters. Why? It's not illegal. You may not like it, but you can't control what the other parent does surely?

From the OP it sounds as though it is not the partner's child (apologies if I've misinterpreted) so she is perfectly within her rights to have absolute control over what he does with her partner and managing risks to keep them within acceptable levels.

Even co-parents have the right to refuse to allow their partner to do something they consider dangerous - if I thought my husband was putting my son in unnecessarily risky situations then I would certainly aim to control what he did to some extent at least.

How did your DS know it was 90? Could it be an exaggeration on his/oh's part?
What did oh say when you confronted him?

Is be happy for mature 10 yr old to be on a bike, in full gear (back plate and everything not just jacket and helmet) but if my dh ever rode at 90 with one of our ds's on the bike I'd refuse to let them back on.

Even on a straight bit of motorway/a road it's not the speed, it's what your body smashes into or gets run over by that would kill you, be it at 10 or 100mph.

My response wasn't for the 90mph, which I agree is silly, but to the posters saying they would ban theirs from bikes, or, rather dramatic, leave.
There are many, many things kids do which are dangerous, climbing trees, swings at parks, push bikes, scooters etc etc which they do far younger than ten and with no protective head gear.
If I were to 'ban' my dh from taking our dd on his bike, his argument is he could ban me from doing any if the above things, which are, in his opinion, more dangerous.

Each to their own but I won't allow my DD ( now 11) as pillion with either me of my DH without FULL protection, no matter how far the journey or how slow the speed limit. No hat, gloves, trousers and boots.

Thought the thread was going to be about from NZ, very powerful, about speeding.

Not bike related, but still relevant. I'd be showing DP.