To think it's acceptable not to be actively pursuing a partner?

[victormeldrewsDD]

I am single.

I have always been single.

I can't see this changing.

Aibu not to try to actually change this? By this I mean - if I meet a lovely man great. If not I am happy with how things are.

So I don't want to join internet dating sites, meet friends' single friends and I certainly don't want to be foisted off onto any single male in the vicinity!

Aibu? I'm not surely (And I have name changed to protect the innocent.)

Yanbu, if you are happy with the way things are then you don't have to change it for anyone.

I am asexual. I don't have relationships.

I love being asexual. I wouldn't swap it for a million pounds.

My perfect relationship is to be single.

Yanbu.

Me too.
I decided years ago that dating and being in a relationship wasn't for me. Didn't make me happy.
Since I made the decision to just accept my single status and not pursue a relationship I've been much happier.

Other people get more worked up about it than I do. I think you just have to believe that you have made the right decision for you and go with it OP. Ignore everyone else who gives you a hard time about it.

Chances are if you were to actively looking to met someone you wouldn't. Or you would but they'd make you unhappy.

If you are happy being single then why change it?

Back when I was single I was very happy. I made the decision to remain celibate until I met someone who I thought was worthy of reversing that decision. I didn't go out on the pull. I went out with my mates and had a great time. And along the way I just happened to meet my now dh.

It amused me then as it does now when some folk discover someone is single they must be miserable and have no life.

YANBU - it's your decision and your life.

My best mate is currently not looking for a partner at all.

OTOH I'm about to start OD again after a short relationship went wrong, but that's cos I'm lonely and it does bother me.

Whatever you choose is perfectly fine.

Unfortunately society likes to think that everyone should be in a partnership and that I itself can put enormous pressure one people.

YANBU. I have always said that if I am ever alone again, I wouldn't bother trying to find another DP. However, there are a couple of male friends who might get a booty call every now and again

YANBU in fact you sound incredibly sorted

I relish my space so I completely agree with you. I get cross at the assumption that I must want/need a partner. More so because I am not particularly attractive and have children so folks intimate I must be gagging for any attention going, and willing to fuck and put up with anyone shows an interest. Gah!

YANBU. I've was pretty much single until about 28. I've been with somebody since then (16 years, no DC), but still feel single in my head, in that I feel that I could end the relationship at any time if it soured and go do my own thing. I don't imagine looking for anyone if this relationship ends. I am largely contented living alone, am quite a private person and dating seems as if it could be a bit of an ordeal.

I think I'm the same. I sometimes think about internet dating, not sure if it's cos I'm lonely or because I feel I ought to try to meet somebody, but what i've read on here about men that women meet OLD doesn't look good. It's like, there's always another woman one click away.

At this stage now, if it happens in real life, so be it, but it probably won't, as I'm in my mid forties and although I'm averagely attractive I'm only that, no more, and I rarely meet men that arent somebody's husband.

of course it's acceptable OP:)
what makes you feel it isn't ?

I also love living alone and spend most of my time alone by choice, I find it hard to imagine wanting things to be any different

Op, you sound sorted.
If you are happy single, fantastic. I think people find it difficult to accept since so much of the social construction of society is based around monogamous couples, that being perfectly happy outside that norm is seen as either subversive, or pathetically misguided, whereas in actual fact it's just people living their lives as they choose.
I also hate that if you are single, and would like to be in a relationship some people automatically label you as desperate - equally untrue. I think there simply isn't quite the general understanding of being single and still fine. (I'm not expressing myself well. I mean that individuals you meet are often normal people who understand, but as a whole 'person on the street Joe public' doesn't understand.)