to think no one says Thank You anymore...

[thanksornothanks]

When I was younger if anyone gave me a present I was always told to say thank you or write a thank you card, especially if it was someone who I had been unable to thank in person. I have stuck to this as I have gotten older. While I know sending cards is probably now seen as old fashioned, I can feel quite hurt when I don't receive any type of acknowledgment when I have given/or sent a gift in the post.

I hand make a lot of things for friends children, so a lot of time goes into this, (when I could easily just spend 5 minutes in a shop choosing something as an alternative). I don't expect a card, a big fanfare, or a fuss, but just a text or quick email to say, 'thanks' I think is just being polite. I do love making things and sending presents, it makes me feel really good to be able to do this for other people and their children, but in the past 12 months I have noticed I have had to ask people if they received something in the post just to check they did get it as it appears to be the norm now to hear nothing back.

I know you shouldn't give only to expect something back, but is it good manners to not acknowledge anything at all? is this just the way society is now?

I haven't noticed this. Maybe I'm friends with polite people.

BTW, every generation says that people are less polite than they were in the past generation. So you are BU to say that this is the way society is now.

YABU to over-generalise. Maybe fewer people say thank you now but I know plenty of people who still say it, and I have taught both my DC to say thank you for everything.

I think you may just know too many mannerless people.

YABU to over-generalise. Maybe fewer people say thank you now but I know plenty of people who still say it, and I have taught both my DC to say thank you for everything.

I think you may just know too many mannerless people.

Your experience is not my experience.

Without meaning to pass as much judgment as it sounds as if I am you do rather labour the point of your lovely home made gifts. In all but a few cases these are often more appreciated by adults.
It does seem to be a little bit more about you than you perhaps think.

In actual terms, yanbu because it is only polite to thank someone for a gift. I would say Yabu if you got an email but demanded a card for example, but no thanks at all is rude.
As I said it really isn't my experience of any generation of people I know, they're all pretty hot on thanks. So you possibly know some very busy and important people or they are rude or you are giving an impression that they have perhaps thanked you on the phone or similar before they receive it and therefore no further action is required? - you need to make it clear you expect thanks for the effort you go to, they are unlikely to spontaneously develop manners or gratitude no matter how hurt you are if it consists of you being silently wounded.
If you don't want to say then just throw a £5 in a card or on some tat or stop sending gifts at all - that might jog a few memories.
If you don't want to say anything but don't want to stop crafting your gifts - we have arrived at our starting point.

I don't mean to over generalise saying everyone is like this. But it is a common trait with particular people I have given presents to. I do have one particular friend who has always thanked me, so maybe I have been spoiled by her actions.

YANBU - very few thank yous sent to us. I've stopped sending gifts to several repeat offenders, based on the fact they are clearly not bothered. A text is sufficient, but to hear nothing at all is just so rude, I agree.

I like a thank you. I posted a birthday present to a teenage relative well in time for his birthday several weeks ago. I've heard nothing since so don't even know it it arrived.

I think I would be rude to e-mail his mother or father to ask if it arrived because they'd know the real reason for contacting them. Would I be rude? If I should, how should I word it, please?

Get thank yous. From all those i send and don't see. Also thank them myself. No different

I have noticed this at times OP. I deliver quite a lot of training at work and its the norm that out of a group of 25-30, we might get 2 or 3 thank you at the end. I find it really rude and thoughtless. It costs nothing and is just basic manners. No excuse.