AIBU to cancel a planned playdate/meet up with friend

[Florabeebaby]

My DH is a taxi driver and he saw my friend with her family in town last night.
Her dad (who I know is a supporter of BNP) was mouthing off at the drivers including my DH who is foreign...he was after a fight but as my DH knew who he was he was asking the other drivers to just ignore him. The police was called but no-one bothered to press charges against him.
BUT my DH then heard my friend herself going on about 'fucking foreigners'.
Now, I am not British either so fall into that category too...she has never displayed such behaviour and comments at all, quite the opposite in my opinion. We are not very close, used to work together and now keep in touch, see each other every now and then.
I feel uncomfortable, the subject is very sore. My DH has to endure racial abuse and has been assaulted at work as well. I 'fit in' so I don't get the abuse but I feel it, IYKWIM. She knows of the trouble my DH has had as well and about his past, the reasons why he came to the UK, not a happy story.
I'm disappointed and feel like never seeing her again.

I'd send her a text saying 'after the other night you and your family made sure I knew how you felt about us fucking foreigners so you'd best delete my number. BTW I feel the same way about racist people. Goodbye'
That way she'll know you don't want to hear any crappy effort of an excuse - not that there is any excuse for this disgusting way of behaving.

Really sorry both you and your husband have had this experience.

I do feel sad...more so as I now understand a little about what dh has to.put up with. And for someone I considered a friend to have made me feel this way is very sad.
I think it was easier to be a foreigner 14 years ago when I came here than now...so much hatred and unease.Err

Ignore the err...phone typo!!

So this is your friend's father?

Do you have reason to believe your friend shares his unpleasant views?

I have lived all over the world and if I started culling every friend I had with a relative who'd expressed a prejudiced opinion, I'd be pretty lonely.

Why not rise above it unless your friend agrees with her dad?

What would you counsel your children to do? Talk to their friend? Or deliver some hysterical 'you're chucked' message over social media as suggested here?

I am neither white nor British and I choose my friends because I like them, not because of the colour of their eyes or skin or political leanings and certainly not based on their father's obnoxious views.

mont the friend was also racist

ontegomongoose it says quite clearly in the OP that her friend was being racist.

Re Cup of cold sick. It takes me back to the playground and one of those rhymes we chanted just because we were not supposed to:

Dirty yellow custard, green snot pie,
All mixed together with a dead dog’s eye.
Slap it on a butty, ten foot thick,
Then wash it all down with a cup of cold sick.

Cut ties. Much better off without them.

yes mont...she was joining in with her father and called my DH and other drivers 'fucking foreigners'. Quite clear she agrees with her father.
I will talk to her, not just send a message...I want her to understand her comments are hurtful and make her understand that I have zero tolerance for racism. It was directed to my DH after all, he was being abused for who he is. Nice.
I just can't get over it, it was not a prejudiced opinion, it was a racist comment. 'Fucking foreigners' is not an opinion.
I would counsel my children to never speak to a person again if they were called the above. You do not need these kind of people around you.
I am quite angry about it now..even after a good nights sleep.

Well done for making a stand.

Yes, cut contact. You don't need people like this in your life.