About DPs and cat?

[catgirl1976]

DH, DS and I live in a rented house. Been in it 4 years and LL has given us notice as he wants to move in.

Where I live rented houses are like gold dust atm. There just aren't any. The first house we found fell through. We have found somewhere else but we have to be out of here on the 9th July and it won't be ready by then. So as of the 9th we have nowhere to live.

DPs have said we can move in with them. It will be for anywhere between 3 days and a week (find out for definite when we can get the keys on Tuesday). However, we have 3 cats and my Dad is refusing to let us bring one of them on the grounds he can (used to be) a bit bad for weeing in the house. He hasn't done this for ages (though to be fair he might being somewhere new)

We can't put him in a cattery as his vacs are not up to date. I don't have anyone who can take him and I can't put him on the street

Now you might think, their house their rules but I have been paying DPs rent for the last couple of months as they are shit with money, had their own house repossesed and are living in my sisters house. She is only charging them enough to cover her mortgage when she could be renting to tenants and making some money and they STILL don't pay then rent. So I have to fucking do it so pregnant DSIS doesn't miss mortgage payments. I have given them about £2k this year which I can ill afford.

I am so pissed off. What am I meant to do with the fucking cat? It's a few sodding days. It can live in the garage if needs be but No. DM is acting like its the 1950s and saying she "can't go against the wishes of her husband"

So where exactly would she like her 2 year old grandson to live for a week.

I have rage.

AIBU?

Would a neighbour have the ginger cat for the few days until you have your own place again?

I could ask around at work if anyone would have him. And I can tell the LL we can't meet the move out date.

I just feel so upset I need to do either of those things rather than my DF just say "Of course you can stay here - you're our daughter and you have helped us out loads. Why would we make life any more stressful for you right now by issuing conditions on the cats" - like a normal fucking person :(

DSis is firmly of the view we need to stop enabling them, but also worried for her mortgage.

She feels she needs to tell them if they can't pay she will have to evict them as she can't risk losing her house for them. But obviously, that's not something she wants to do. And she is 8.5 month pg and single (a whole other thread right there!)

'Well, seeing as it's neither your house OR your funds paying your rent, you have absolutely no say in whether I bring my cat into the house my sister owns and I currently help fund.'

If your parents are evicted, wouldn't it be the Council's responsibility to rehouse them? That would free the house for your sister to let it to someone else (unless she wanted to move into it), you need not pay rent, your parents have somewhere else and their rent paid by us housing benefit.

Angel, you'd be much, much better off telling your landlord that you can't move out for another week.

No two moves for the cats and you won't risk giving your father the good bloody pasting he so thoroughly deserves.

I can't believe how unhelpful they are. Some people have no fucking shame.

Thanks bitter

I will find out when I can definitely get the keys to the new house and ring him

There's a chance it will be for the 9th but a small one

I did naively think "Ooh - we could go to Centreparcs for a week." Then I looked at the cost in July and nearly choked on my coffee :)

And that's before I had thought about who would have the cats!

Happy that was my sisters thinking when considering evicting them. She felt then they would get somewhere sorted but it wouldn't be putting her mortgage at risk

She wasn't being evil, she just worries (rightly) and felt if she evicted them she would be assuring them somewhere else to live.

They already get HB but it only covers about half the rent. DSis let them have her place as they were struggling to get a bond together and rent somewhere with an active bankruptcy on file. She had paying tenants before then and made some (small) income from it. Now she just covers the mortgage.

Your dad is being utterly unreasonable.

But I did wonder - do the cats have to move when you do, if decorators are coming in is LL not moving in immediately? Could you ask as a favour if cats could stay and you pop in and feed them - then they only have to move house once and your dad doesn't get a chance to be mean to the ginger one?

Catgirl - you remember Vallhala/DogsBestFriend??? This is a cut and paste of her Facebook about this thread...

Would someone like to go onto the thread or pm the OP and tell her that I'l happily look after the pusscat for the week they'll be between houses?
Tell her who I am, what I do, and that I'll meet her, talk to her on the phone and of course supply references for her peace of mind. Thank you.

So, if you need any help....? :)

That could work Cheery - Landlord is very amicable and they wouldn't mind the decorators as they are out all day any way.

That's a really good idea.

I feel so much better for the vent and you've all made me realise I have quiet a few options from telling DPs to suck it up to not moving out on the 9th or leaving the cats in situ for a few days

Oh!

Could you tell Val that is so, so lovely

I'm so moved by that. Please tell her I miss her on here and she is lovely and so kind to offer

She wouldn't offer lightly either Catgirl :) Do you want to pm me and I will put you in touch if you need her??

I will - I just have to pop out but please tell her how moved I am

I will be ok but I appreciate her offering so much xx

She can read the thread - just can't post.

She's very moved by your post too!

Frankly OP it seems like evicting them could be a very sensible move.

They will then get housed elsewhere, for less than the real 'cost' - ie your sister's mortgage - of housing them now.

If you look at it in terms of maximising the family resources, right now you're doing exactly the wrong thing - you are shoring them up at an ever-increasing cost... because effectively you and your sis are cutting her income by having them there. She could be making a small income on the property. Given that you clearly feel responsible for making sure your parents are ok, it would surely be more sensible long-term to get them housed elsewhere, and maximise the finds from her rental house with it in the back of your minds that at some point you might well (unfortunately) need just those kind of funds to manage them through a future crisis.

Val

I am not sure if you are still reading the thread, but now I know you can see it, I just wanted to say a huge thank you from me and my little cat Mig.

It was so kind of you to offer what you did and I am touched beyond words that a virtual stranger would offer to help me like that. I think we will be ok as I will either tell my parents it's tough or take one of the other suggestions on here, but I cannot thank you enough for the offer.

I remember you on here and always liked you. I will PM MotherJack my e-mail / FB details in case you would ever like to get in touch or on the off chance there is ever anything I can do for you.

I hope you are well and things are good with you.

Sending you a huge thank you and a great big purr from my little ginger friend

Cat

x

I was also going to suggest leaving the cats where they are but I see you have a kind offer.

I had a friend's cat for a week under similar circumstances so do ask around.

I also used to foster for cats' protection and we would have the odd foster cat that was not being re-homed but going back to their original owner.

Tell your dad you and dsis will kick him out if he ever becomes incontinent.

Quick update - DSis is going to have the cat whilst we are in between homes

Thank you all x