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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

teacher injures my child

148 replies

lulamay · 26/06/2014 23:03

My daughter of 14yrs has recently had her appendix removed, and was told by the hospital doctors NOT to do PE for six weeks.
The school were aware that she was absent due to her operation, and I had sent three emails to the school, to tell them what the doctors had advised.
The staff were aware, but the cover teacher told my daughter to just be a fielder, which meant lots of running around, as the ball seemed to come to her a lot, and the pupils were overly keen for her not to let their side down. She then gets hit in the nose by a tennis ball, thrown at her by this teacher!
She was in so much pain around her stitches that the school called me after PE for advice on what my daughter should do! She wanted to soldier on and come home on the bus, as I don't drive. But, when she got home I was really cross with the school, as they should never of allowed her to be pressurised to play.
She even had school work she could of caught up with due to her absence, under the guidance of another teacher, had she been aware that she was being made to do PE, even after I told them she can't.
The school is afraid of what I might do now.

Can anyone advise me as to my next move. Do I take her to the doctor's in the morning and make a case, or report to the school? Do I write a firm letter, or email. This should never have happened. Am I being unreasonable to expect the school to be held accountable for my daughter's injuries? Is this a case of negligence on their part? And what can I expect as recompense?

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 26/06/2014 23:48

tell us

AnyFucker · 26/06/2014 23:49

it's getting late and it is a school night

steff13 · 26/06/2014 23:50

I agree with Only1scoop.

When I think of compensation, I think of money.

SquigglySquid · 26/06/2014 23:51

She is not able to stand up to school authority figures, as she does as she's told, even it seems to her detriment.

Unfortunately this is literally a painful lesson that she needs to learn. I know it's hard at 14, but she is going to be an adult in a few short years, she needs to learn how to be assertive and stand up for herself. I wouldn't harp on the point with her, but it is her fault that she's in pain right now. She needs to learn to be her own advocate.

But in the meantime I'd send her in with a physical note to give to the teacher and tell her that it's ok to disobey authority figures in this situation if they try otherwise.

AnyFucker · 26/06/2014 23:51

yeah but, no but what were your daughter's injuries

it's in your title, your daughter was injured

why so coy ?

Sisyphus85 · 26/06/2014 23:55

AnyFucker that is probably enough now.

Lily if your daughter was made to play when she said she had permission not to, and that made put her in pain then the school are in part at fault. But you also need to recognise that your DD could have prevented the situation by being more vocal. Though I know that is not easy for most 14yo girls.

Email the school saying you are disappointed, they will say sorry. Have a word with your DD about the need to stand up for herself. It shouldn't really need to go any further than that.

Original poster
lulamay · 26/06/2014 23:56

Thanks everyone. I'm going to contact the school tomorrow and take her to our GP if she still feels bad. Oh and my daughter forgot her hand written note, that's why I emailed and rang the school, who informed me she would not be participating and not to worry.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 26/06/2014 23:58

no, I don't think it is

I want to know why OP isn't detailing her daughter's injuries here

PedlarsSpanner · 26/06/2014 23:59

Still wanting to know what injuries were inflicted on dd by the teacher

AnyFucker · 27/06/2014 00:00

I mean, it's disgusting isn't it

the girl was injured by a teacher

except, she wasn't, was she ?

ohdearitshappeningtome · 27/06/2014 00:00

The supply teacher probably
Thought your daughter was trying
It on like most at pe! What stopped the art teacher going to collect
Your daughter and take her away to do the catch up!

School definately owes you an apology and perhaps it's
Time to teach tour dd some confidence to prevent further situations

Hope she feels better soon

DottyDooRidesAgain · 27/06/2014 00:00

Sisy Who made you thread police Hmm

Any is asking a valid question which has been ignored by the OP 3 times.

I would also like to know what these injuries wee.

NoodleOodle · 27/06/2014 00:00

She needs to learn what to do in situations like this. So, if she's not confident enough to speak up against a teacher to get some assistance, could she have gone to the receptionist, or form tutor, or head teacher for back up for instance, or does she have visible scars from operation she could have shown?

Original poster
lulamay · 27/06/2014 00:01

Her injuries are and a swollen nose,( can't breathe through her left nostril), and internal pain in the abdomen where she is still taped after surgery

OP posts:
DottyDooRidesAgain · 27/06/2014 00:01

were Blush

Only1scoop · 27/06/2014 00:01

I find the description of being hit on the nose by a tennis ball....which then caused pain around stitches a little confusing....

Was there more than one injury sustained?

IAmNotAMindReader · 27/06/2014 00:02

I'd have a note on file that I'd just print out each day to cover her for all eventualities here.

You need to arrange a meeting with the school, possibly head of year and teacher involved (assuming they are going to be around for a while).
If not I would perhaps ask your LEA what the procedure is for obtaining an apology from said teacher. I would want to have had a face to face meeting with them to discuss your DDs medical needs and how they shouldn't think they have a greater medical knowledge than her Drs. I would also want to know what the school would be doing to prevent this happening again to your DD and others.

I wouldn't be out for blood but an apology and to see some understanding that this isn't just a child trying to skive out of a lesson and an overprotective parent but that real damage could have been done. In preparation for this I would contact your GP and get them to send over an explanation f what potential damage may have been caused so this can be passed on to all concerned.

I would also take your DD for a check up and sit her down and help her understand those in authority don't always get it right and sometimes need to be challenged.

I know the tone of your post did appear like you were seeking monetary recompense but I think you are after an apology, assurances that it won't happen again to anyone and to see evidence of revised procedures in place.

AnyFucker · 27/06/2014 00:02

at last, why so coy, OP ?

yes, take her to the doctor

get the injuries witnessed and documented by a professional

Only1scoop · 27/06/2014 00:04

Are you thinking the nose may be broken? Can't breathe through left nostril due to swelling....sounds like a casualty job maybe?

Hope she is ok.

arethereanyleftatall · 27/06/2014 00:04

This isn't arguing with a teacher or not doing what you're told. It's just saying 'I'm afraid I can't do pe today as I had my appendix out x days ago'. I can't see that that's that difficult for a 14 yr old. (Trying to get my head around 3xthats in a row, but I think it's right).

MadameDefarge · 27/06/2014 00:07

Squiggly, healthcare in the UK is not free. We pay something called National Insurance out of our wages for healthcare and other benefits.

HTH

theQuibbler · 27/06/2014 00:07

OP - that's a really good post from IAmNotAMindReader. I hope it helps and also that you are able to ignore the unhelpful sniping.

Hope your daughter feels better soon.

arethereanyleftatall · 27/06/2014 00:10

Xposted with lots.
Op, your subsequent posts are better tgan your first, which got everyone's back up.
What I would do is take her to the doctors tomo. Sort her put first, and only then worry about recompense.

steff13 · 27/06/2014 00:11

Squiggly, healthcare in the UK is not free. We pay something called National Insurance out of our wages for healthcare and other benefits.

You don't pay anything out of pocket at the point of service, though, right?

IAmNotAMindReader · 27/06/2014 00:12

I can see the situation going like this:

"Sorry I can't do PE i had an operation"

"Go get your kit on and stop trying to get out of it"

"But really look you can see the ....."

"One more word and you'll be in detention"

I remember a kid getting sent back to do PE after possibly breaking a couple of bones, it was obvious they had. However the Head of year came along and decided it was attention seeking and sent them back to class with a stern warning that any more mention of it would result in suspension. Poor kid turned up next day in a cast with irate parents wanting to know why their child hadn't had medical attention.

Its not so hard to believe there was a thread here a couple of months ago about the stuff teachers put us through and quite a few involved not being believed about injuries and illnesses.