Giving details as vaguely as possible to avoid identifying anyone. Basically I'm on a committee, one of the new members recently sent round a general email querying our procedure for dealing with something. I answered it as it was something I knew about. Then she came back with a related query, ending up with a paragraph in which she apologised for sticking with the point, and saying she had an "annoying autism about procedure". Aaaaaarrgh.
I had to count to 10 several times before replying, and didn't address that specific point because it would have diverted from the main issue and I needed time to think about it anyway. I'm assuming in her favour that she just wasn't thinking, but I'm quite shocked that the thought even enters her head that it's acceptable to use "autism" in that way and especially to describe it as annoying. Even more so as she's in an occupation which could loosely be described as one of the caring professions. If she came up with anything similar at meetings I doubt that I'd be able to keep quiet, and there are one or two members who would probably shout at her.
So I'm trying to think of a tactful way to suggest that that was unfortunate phrasing, no doubt she didn't realise, please don't do it again. But it's difficult to work out something that doesn't sound stroppy/patronising/bossy. Any thoughts?