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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To use a pram for DS (3.5)?

99 replies

ziggiestardust · 25/06/2014 15:34

We just moved to London, and DS is struggling on days out such as the Royal Parks and Castles, where the tube stations are often a good half mile or more away from where you want to be in the park, and a lot of the 'wandering around' element really takes it out of him. He was a late walker anyway, and we often end up carrying him towards the end of the day, which is fine but it's exhausting!

Yesterday we went to Hampton Court Palace, and by the time we'd walked to the station in town, walked to Hampton Court, been around the maze etc, he was exhausted poor thing! And there was so much more I wanted to show him. I'm wondering if this wouldn't be solved with a small foldaway buggy that we can use at either end of the journey for a more enjoyable day for him. We honestly do cover quite a bit of ground, and his little legs just aren't quite up to it. We're not thrashing it either; anyone who has visited London will realise how much ground you actually cover doing seemingly very little.

He does walk 20 mins through the park to nursery and back, is outside all day (it's a forest school) and he swims twice a week and plays football once a week; so he's pretty fit and healthy.

AIBU to get a pram or should I just make him walk and tough it out a bit?

OP posts:

JassyRadlett · 25/06/2014 22:51

But no matter what, Rhonda, if you're doing a big day out by public transport (as you tend to do in London - if you're leaving your bit it can be a trek), a small child's legs will get tired. So you can either stay close to base until they don't get tired, or you can take a pushchair, give them a break when they need it, and enable the whole family to have slightly more varied experiences. Plus I'd say those sorts of day out where kids are mostly walking except for when they really do need a break is a good way of oncreasong their stamina.

I'd find it such a waste to live where I do but for all our family excursions to be either close to home or out of London to make going by car feasible.

Anyway, OP's found a buggy, I've said what I think, so have a good night, all.

mindthegap79 · 25/06/2014 22:57

I love my Maclaren swivel wheel stroller - loads of decent looking 2nd hand ones on Facebook selling pages, gumtree etc. Mine is also 2nd hand and sadly spent a few years lurking in my inlaws' garage. Still, it's smelling fresh again now.

Oh and YANBU.

mindthegap79 · 25/06/2014 22:59

And no I didn't read the full thread, sorry op. Enjoy your Zapp (smile)

mindthegap79 · 25/06/2014 22:59

SuburbanRhonda · 25/06/2014 22:59

jassy, I agree if you had several children it would be a good option for the youngest one, but I got the impression from the OP that there was only one child involved in these excursions, but of course I could be wrong. Just that no other children were mentioned.

The problem with a buggy for an older child is, of course, that they may fall asleep in it, thus missing the attractions (especially if they are put in it because they are tired).

RedSoloCup · 25/06/2014 23:00

I have a Petit Zia Star I still use for my 3yo, v similar to quinny zapp (old style) it's light, small and perfect for her, hth....

Gileswithachainsaw · 25/06/2014 23:11

If they fall asleep, they fall asleep. By three, one has truly had enough of limiting their excursions on the basis of a small child. No need, when there's a perfectly good solution.

MrsMook · 25/06/2014 23:17

Ds1 is a similar age and tends to get more tired now he's phasing his naps out than he did a few months back when he'd be revived by a good solid nap part way through the day. Having a younger sibling, there's usually some combination of pram/ buggy/ sling/ carrier involved so it's easy enough to tansport him when he's had enough. I'd rather that he enjoys walking and rests than make a meal out of it and put him off in the long run.

allisgood1 · 25/06/2014 23:32

YANBU.
It's a lot of walking for a small person, they tire out much easier than we do!

A short trip out, no, but a long day out definitely. I still put my 5 year old on the buggy board for those long days.

FloozeyLoozey · 25/06/2014 23:36

I think I still had a light foldaway push chair for ds at that age. We didn't have a car and he was in nursery full time, so sometimes the poor little beggar was tired out. If he's otherwise active and it isn't used all the time, yanbu.

Thenapoleonofcrime · 25/06/2014 23:38

I had dropped the pushchair for my youngest dd when she was about 3, then we went to London for the week when she was 4, debated whether to bother, and were sooooo glad we took it with us. In London,you can be walking for miles between attractions,we waited two hours at the Natural History Museum (which was quite fun, we had sandwiches and played games) and she sat in it, it was brilliant. It's just not the same as going on a short walk from home but that's often not possible in London where the journey can be 1 or 2 hours each way plus loads of walking.

As for those saying- don't take them out, how silly, what if you have older children, do you all sit in til your 4 year old can walk miles and miles a day? They have little legs! Going for days out is great fun and probably involves a lot more walking even with the odd buggy ride back to the bus or underground.

bellybuttonfairy · 25/06/2014 23:41

My 2 1/2 scooters on his sisters maxi microlight scooter. When he gets tired I just pull up the front bit and pull him along with one hand. Ive walked miles like this - they are incredibly light, it just seems to follow your hand. Its also easy to get on/off trains etc

erin99 · 25/06/2014 23:42

Yeah I had a couple of funny comments from mums at the school gate when I had my preschooler in the buggy, in the year before he started school. I only got comments from people who (a) lived closer to school than we did AND (b) drove! So they can bugger off. There's not some sort of rule that 3yos have to be able to walk 4 miles a day. As soon as he started school and no longer had to do the return trip twice, he was fine. Get the buggy.

Sillylass79 · 25/06/2014 23:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Coveredinweetabix · 26/06/2014 00:11

I went out with just 4.8yr DD the other day & still took the pushchair. I knew it was going to be a long, hot day, there was going to be loads of walking involved & that we would have loads of stuff so, for the first 2/3 of the day, it was used to carry stuff around in and, in the latter part of the day, DD hopped in and out of it on occasion. Normally, she was too excited and too interested in what was going on to want to be in the pushchair but, if we were waiting or at a boring bit, she'd climb in. Some people may have judged me but I really don't care. DD is fit & healthy and can walk but why spoil a day out due to tiredness when it can be avoided? It would have been awkward to give her a piggyback as I would have been carrying a rucksack and her scooter wouldn't have been suitable.

SuburbanRhonda · 26/06/2014 07:07

napoleon, can't speak for others who suggest tailoring the activity to the child, but in my post I said it would indeed be useful to bring a pushchair for the youngest if you had older children with you.

However, in the OP there is no mention of older children, just the 3.5 year old. This is why if I just had the one child with me, as it would seem the OP has, I would choose an activity which didn't involve more walking than my child was capable of and save the longer, more tiring days out for when he or she was able to cope with the walking.

OddFodd · 26/06/2014 07:15

Get a mclaren volo. Umbrella golf with a shoulder carrying strap. Light but sturdy.

JassyRadlett · 26/06/2014 08:24

Nah, I don't have an older kid, and we love days out. If DS has a sleep, brilliant, he still naps most days. He misses a bit but it's not the end of the world and DH and I enjoy something - maybe a bit he'd enjoy less.

Because, shock, DH and I often choose to do things we might enjoy as well.

DS loves it. He will natter about things we've seen and done for weeks afterwards. It would be very dull and restrictive for him to only do things he could walk to and around in toto for the next few years just because I was - what? - embarrassed? - is that it? - about having a child who's a good walker in a buggy.

A choice between taking a dinosaur obsessed kid to the Natural History Museum, with a pushchair for when he's knackered, or waiting until he's old enough to manage the day without a pushchair? I know what I think is the sensible option.

I take it you don't live in London, Rhonda?

SuburbanRhonda · 26/06/2014 08:36

jassy, yes I do

Lucylouby · 26/06/2014 10:24

I have no problems putting my dd, aged 3 in the buggy if we are walking long distances. When I am childminding she goes on the buggy board a lot. We can walk over 5 miles in a day just doing school runs and going to toddler groups, so why would I want to tire her, just for the sake of getting her to where we need to be?

I used to childmind for a family who were so proud that there dc didn't use a buggy with them from their second birthday. The child was a fantastic walker apparently. They failed to grasp the only walking the child ever did with them was a gently stroll up and down the high street on a Saturday. I had the child full time, and the dc was still going in my buggy at 3, as their little legs just couldn't keep going for the distance to school. It was no problem for me to push them, much easier than trying to cajole a tired and grumpy child home.

I find a lot of people that judge extended buggy use are the parents who are to lazy to walk places themselves so use the car for every journey. Of course their children don't need a buggy to go the very short distance from the car to the school gate.

Hazchem · 26/06/2014 10:34

I still use a push chair for DS at least once a week and he is 3 and 1/4.

JohnnyBarthes · 26/06/2014 10:35

I briefly bowed to pressure to dump the buggy and ended up getting buses home after days in town. This meant we probably ended up walking less than we did when I took the stroller!

Yanbu, basically ??

JassyRadlett · 26/06/2014 10:54

Gosh, I'm surprised. I can't imagine how restricting and boring it would be to confine our outings would be if we were confined to places we could drive to and/or that DS could comfortably walk the whole way.

The dinosaurs, the big machines and the castles still win, in my book. I dont get why the pushchair is the devil.

SuburbanRhonda · 26/06/2014 12:09

I don't think anyone is saying the pushchair is the devil, jassy.

You say you take several children with you. I've said in more than one post now that I can see the value of a pushchair in that scenario. But I'm not going to say it again because if people don't read the post properly, that's not my issue.

The OP only talks about one child, for whom it would be easier, IMO, to tailor the trip to what he's physically able to do and leave the pushchair at home until he reaches an age when he can manage the walking comfortably.

weatherall · 26/06/2014 12:15

It's a catch 22 situation.

He won't build up stamina unless he does long walks but in the meantime these walks can be a total pita!

Tbh I think stick with it, making him walk and you will all be better for it in the long run. Just factor in lots of little breaks and snacks/drinks.

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