To think this "new thing" he does is just a new mind game he's discoved?

[ShitShaveOrHaircut]

History between me and DP is rocky to say the least. He's sarcastic, verbally abusive and has been known to play mind games.

We've been getting on well these past few months but this past couple of weeks he's been a bit off with me. Avoiding me (messing around 'doing things' in an evening rather than sitting with me like he used to). Not talking much. Rare sex (and lack of foreplay which again is unusual).

Now - A few days ago I said to him "was that boat race on today?". He just carried on messing on the ipad and didn't reply. I said "DP?" ... no reply. I nudged him, he said "umm?" lazily. It was obvious he'd heard me. I said "the boat race in town, was it on today?" - after an odd delay he said "yeah, think so." I said "did you not fancy it?" (he usually goes) and he ignored me. I asked again - silence (he's sitting right next to me btw!) I snapped "why are you ignoring me???" and he replied "I'm not, no was too busy for the boat race, didn't fancy it."

So that was the first example. He's done it a few times since. It's deliberate. And it's obvious. Now that I've shown it riles me, he'll do it more. It's a new thing for sure, he NEVER done it before the example above. AIBU to think he's discovered a new game to play?

It's him that puts the TV on. I'd be happy with a glass of wine and a conversation but the chances of that are laughable.

OP it's really not normal in a relationship to be looking out for new ways that he 'attacks' you. That's really worrying

Seriously, LTB. You don't even sound like you like him very much anyway.

Why are you asking the question?

If you want people to say, 'yes, it's a new mind game, it's okay to end the relationship' I am sure you can get that. Do you need proof that the relationship is 'bad enough to end'. Lots of people on here will give you that validation. Actually, you don't need proof to end a relationship, you don't need a reason and you don't need an excuse. You can just decide you want it to end. You could end it because it is Tuesday. You do not have to justify yourself to him or anyone else. Are you really asking, 'is this bad enough to call time?'

It sounds like a game the way it is presented, I don't know how he would explain it, but from your perspective now he can play nasty with you in a new way. Isn't that nice?

How on board is he with making your relationship work? It takes two to make a relationship and one person cannot do it on their own.

Personally if I was in your shoes I would be avoiding him. I'd take the game away. However this will not help your relationship. Good luck.

Oh just give it up already. This is not a relationship. You are living with a man who can't be arsed with you, doesn't see you as an adult, doesn't show love in the bedroom and makes you feel you have to be grateful for getting along fine. When a relationship is right it just works. There is no teenage angst and analysis. You just enjoy being together and are a team.

It's just new crap behaviour, to add

Sorry,

To add on to the previous crap behaviour. Why are you putting up with it?

LisaMed has put it far more eloquently than I could have. I don't mean to be rude but why on earth put up with this behaviour? It's obvious that he is no longer on board with the relationship if you are even suspecting he's playing mind games with you, so please have some self respect and end it.

Does he make you happy? Do you like being in a relationship with him?

History between me and DP is rocky to say the least. He's sarcastic, verbally abusive and has been known to play mind games

^^ THIS is the part that I thought he was a wanker and not worth your time, the rest of your posts just pour more petrol on the flames.

Don't give this creep 5 seconds more of your life.

Life is short. Just so you know.

You sound very very tense and as though you're looking at all of his behaviour through a lens of "what's he up to now, the irritating twat."

In any event it doesn't sound great but I'm not sure who is at fault.

The one who is sarcastic, verbally abusive and prone to playing mind games is the one at fault.

I'm not quite sure why you are wondering what this new behaviour is. What you should be thinking is, it's not very nice, he's already abusive to you. Why am I still here?

Life is too long to spend it with a twat. Too long to spend it stressing and walking on egg shells.

You don't have to be in a relationship you know.

It's less lonely to be alone than to be with someone who ignores you and plays mind-games with you.

LTB