To think the school should have noticed my child was missing?

[DreamingAlice]

Posting here because I am slightly at a loss as to how to respond to this.

My daugher is 6 and this is her second year in school though first at this particular primary as we moved last summer. It is a small, rural school in a tight knit community- and her class has about 25 kids.

What happened is this: last week during break my daughter was making a den in the school garden. One of the other students told her that the younger children would come and tear it down after break. My daughter was very upset by this (she is a bit OCD about having her stuff destoyed) so when the bell went, she stayed outside to protect the den.

Instead of going back to the regular class, they were due to have a class with the music teacher. Apparently nobody did a head count- because nobody noticed my daughter wasn't there- and she missed the whole class, a half hour or so or maybe longer.

After music the students went back to the normal classroom and her usual primary class teacher headcounted and noticed one child wasn't there, whereupon the alarm was raised and a search commenced. I don't know exactly how long it took them to find her.

The primary class teacher phoned me later that day to explain what happened BUT she didn't make clear that my daughter had missed the whole of music class- so I was left with the impression that her absence was noted right after break and she was found a very short time later. So I didn't make a big deal out of it and just reiterated to my daughter that she needs to always come in at the bell and follow instructions. It was only when speaking to some other parents (who had heard about it from their children) that I then quizzed my daugher and got more of the story.

My daughter was fine so I don't want to overreact- but had something sinister or injurious actually happened to her, it would have been some time before anyone realised- and frankly, I don't understand why no onc noticed earlier. I am thinking I will go back to the school and simply flag my concern that there appears to be a lapse in their procedures in accounting for all the kids, at least where external teachers are concerned. Or should I go more on the warpath? I like her primary teacher and have generally been happy with the school.

I wouldn't go on the warpath because that just makes people defensive but I would go in and speak to the head. Either their procedures are not good enough or the teacher didn't follow them but yes, someone should check that all the children that go out to play come in again.

I think you should definitely talk to the head and find out more about it.

All kids should be accounted for. What would happen if the fire alarm went off for example?

If they were out in the playground, there should definitely have been a head count when they got in.

I would go for the former to raise the issue in the first instance - maybe just start by asking them if they have changed their procedures to take into account situations such as the one that occurred with your daughter. If they don't appear to be taking it seriously, then you can ramp it up a bit, but they may well have already reviewed their policies on the basis of last week's mix-up - it must have been a scary thing for everyone involved so you'd hope that it would trigger an automatic change in procedure.

To be honest, if you are happy with the school and this is the first mistake they've made, I'd go with your first instinct and nicely flag it up. It's unfortunate that your daughter chose that particular day/time to go missing (with the music teacher) presumably if she had her regular teacher straight after break she would have noticed immediately. So I would just go to the school and say, while your daughter was fine, next time a child could be injured, and can they reassure you that procedures have been tightened up. The school will ensure that all teachers do a head count/register immediately after break or whenever the children move around the school. To be honest, the fact that the class teacher phoned you personally shows that they are taking it seriously, if they weren't then you'd have heard about it from your daughter.

talk to the head about their procedures and enquire what they are going to change to ensure it won't happen again some schools will sweep this under the carpet and not do anything till it happens again and occasionally again (re my friends child who "escaped" not once not twice but thrice! at age 4/5 and went home across a busy road or two)

I don't do a head count in my class after every break or assembly?

I would have expected the teachers/TAs who were on duty at playtime to do a sweep of the playground and for her to have been seen in that way. That's IMO is where the procedure broke down.

I wouldn't go on the warpath, but I would speak to the Head and find out what procedures are in place to ensure this can't happen again.

My concern would be if a child falls and hurts themselves at break, no one might notice until serious damage could have occurred.

The school playground has certain nooks and crannies, as well as a front bit and back bit so it wouldn't be easy to establish if anyone remained outside with a visual sweep.

Thinking about this, I have realised what I am also annoyed that despite being phoned the extent of absence was basically downplayed and it was only speaking to other parents (who were all agog to know what happened as apparently the whole school was in an uproar) that I've learned what happened, which makes me feel like the last to know and somewhat deceived.

I would expect teachers to do a head count after each break. Just because a child is not in yard does not mean they are where they are meant to be.
I would flag it to the school, I would be nearly more concerned about he fact that the teacher effectively lied to you by obmission and didnt tell you the full story of what happened. I find this instinct to cover up worrying, you should have been fully informed of what happened not have to find out for yourself.

I would want to know what the plan is the ensure this doesn't happen again.

It's lucky it wasn't a child who is diabetic, got epilepsy or any other medical thing that could have happend and being left that long would of had serious outcome.

I agree with you, you've been mollified. I wouldn't be happy about that at all.

YANBU. It sounds similar to the terrain of our school and a visual sweep of the yard is not enough to ensure a dc isn't missing.
tbh I'm a bit that Checkpoint Charlie's school thinks that is sufficient. A dc could have left the school during break fgs or have wandered into a classroom, got locked in a toilet, etc.
I'd just ask the school to clarify their procedure for keeping track of dc's during the school day ie after break, after lunch, moving between classes. If they don't do a head count then I'd be asking them to implement it asap.
I'd also mention that I was a bit concerned that it wasn't made clear to you how long your dd was missing for and that you had to rely on information from other parents, which may or may not be reliable, but if the info from the school had been clear then there would have been no opportunity for confusion.

But you don't really know that the school downplayed it to be fair

You're just going on what other parents have heard from their children

I do think the school have downplayed it. When she phoned me, the teacher definitely made it sound like my daughter's absence was noticed right away after break, whereas it was over half an hour. When I heard elsewhere that she had missed the whole of music, I was quite taken aback. Then I quizzed my daughter more fully and she confirmed what the other parents were saying.

It is the down playing that is as bad as the fact that no one noticed your child was missing imo. I hate the gossiping about this that seems to have occurred. A small child was upset by something someone said to the point they hid in the playground alone for half an hour was it? yet people are all agog .

You have two issues - the non noticing and the down playing. Stay calm but as you say, if she had been taken or hurt that is 30 minutes where no one knew,

As well as speaking with the school I think you need to speak to your dd about the importance of following the rules when at school.
I would have been very cross with my dc if they had chosen not to go back into school with the others.

I'd simply say that following the call from the school, you were under the impression that your DD had been missing for minutes instead of an entire period, and that now that it is clear to you that she was outside for a significant period (she is only 6) without being missed; that you would like to know what changes in procedures are being made to ensure that there is no repeat. I'd raise it verbally and follow it up in writing. You can do this nicely without it turning into a huge Ofsted drama but it isn't acceptable, even in a naice rural school.

I think you'll find that changes have already been made, and if not, then you would be completely justified in raising holy hell imo. Most adults are hyper-vigilent these days though and a professional staff would be reviewing their processes.

I had a similar incident this year and it's been v obvious that steps have been taken to ensure that there is no repeat. It handled in a v low key way on the day and it was explained to me that this was also not to unduly upset the children so they don't see bogeymen around every corner; but I had a personal letter from the form teacher and I can see that procedures have been tightened up. I'm satisfied that it was an unfortunate lapse, which yes could have had terrible consequences but lapses do happen and thankfully children rarely come to harm as a result.

From what you have said (and it depends how upset your daughter was) I don't think you can do much about the 'downplaying'.

However, I think its reasonable to calmly contact them to check what their procedures are. Clearly they didn't know where your 6 year old was for a fair amount of time. It is reasonable for them to explain to you what they are doing to ensure this won't happen again.

I have an almost Pavlovian response to hearing somebody counting in 2's because of all the times we were counted in and out of the classroom at Primary school.

A physical sweep not a visual one, we have lots of children who like to hide...

We also have an adult who watches the only exit route and an adult inside checking who is in the toilet. So it is perfectly safe at my school. We also have lots of members of staff on duty and lots of TAs who shadow children on a 1:1 basis so no one is ever left outside.

However I would suggest that if there are nooks and crannys, these are checked!!? And yes, half an hour is a long time for her to be missed. Also if it is a different teacher should they not have done a quick register?
But I am surprised so many of you expect teachers to do a head count every time chn leave and renter their classroom.

Maybe I should start? Or maybe it's just me that doesn't and the rest of the staff do?! I will ask!

Yes, I have spoken to my daughter about it. The teacher told me that my daughter had had a talking to already about it at school as well. I would normally be quite cross but in this case I sincerely don't think she was doing out of badness or willfully disregarding the rules but rather she was so upset about her den getting wrecked that she lost sight of what she was meant to be doing.

"Maybe I should start? "

Well if nothing else it's a good way of revising times tables!

The school should have some sort of written policy for this (deriving from a risk assessment). You could ask see that & suggest it is reviewed if not adequate. Also the incident should have been recorded so you could ask to see the report and note if there are actions deriving from it, such as a training update for all staff.

Merry indeed!