I feel my son is being exploited, WIBU to contact the college running his apprenticeship without his knowledge?

[carlajean]

My son is in his mid-20s and is on apprenticeship. I feel he is being exploited (12 hour days, and he has worked most Bank Holidays and at least one day every weekend). Because he wants to do well, he doesn't rock the boat by sticking to his set hours. He hasn't taken any holiday this year because the company say that they need him to come in to get the work through.
He also refuses to tell the College about this for the same reasons.
WIBU to tell the College about my concerns (on the basis that they should be able to go in and investigate it without revealing that I have contacted them).
Before I get flamed, I am aware that he is an adult and has to make his own choices. And part of me thinks that he has to develop some backbone himself, but he literally has no life apart from work/eat/sleep.

Its not unreasonable to be worried about him but how is he going to feel and how will it affect your relationship with him if you do? he could lose his apprenticeship over it couldn't he? And its sort of a fact of life, this happens in a lot of workplaces, holidays get cancelled and days off changed at NO notice, called out at all hours for ridiculous stuff. I'd be proud of him and his attitude to his work and future. Its quite rare now a days to see someone so young like this.

Dont do this! He's doing something good. Does he get paid overtime? This is how most people on apprenticeships do it if they want to get on.

I wasn't on an apprenticeship but I did spend most of my twenties worked (have always done and still work weekends). I got what I wanted, a successful career that I was able to dictate post babies.

If you want success you have to put it in. End of....

There are wives who phone managers a t dhs work I was when I heard this

Likely the college would refuse to even note your concerns or discuss the matter with you quite rightly.

It sounds like exploitation, but your son is probably looking at the bigger picture, particularly in the current economic market. It would not BU for your son to raise concerns, either before or after the apprenticeship ends, but for you to do so would be absurd.

The reason I said I would is because when I was a similar age I was running a small store as head office hadn't replaced the manager. This went on for over 6 months of working often 6 day weeks, sometimes 10 hour days. No holiday. Unbeknownst to me my grandfather wrote to the MD (very high profile with his fingers in many pies.)
The first I knew was when the area manager turned up. It was beyond mortifying BUT it got the problem sorted and we had a new manager within a couple of months.
The company that the OP's son is with don't sound great if that is the way they treat the apprentices. Are they treating the other staff differently?

Dd works for a company sometimes when theyneec her she works long hours because thats just the norm of the thing she does, she is desoerate to work there full time she sometimes goes and helps out for free to see how the company works, thats a good thing imo she is showing keenness (is that the word im after),

www.apprenticeships.org.uk/contactus.aspx

just don't interfere

I would agree it's not for you to get involved, but at the college where I work we would expect an assessor to be visiting your son in the workplace every four weeks and helping him deal with this sort of issue as well as his course work. (And we would want to check out which companies do this so that we don't place other apprentices there!)

He is looking ahead. He wants to succeed. He is old enough to run his own life. The company are being unreasonable about his hols. He doesn't seem bothered. If it is a lack of confidence, all you can do is advise......if he asks for advice.

I would offer an opinion to my Ds and advise further if he wanted as per ghost

Sometimes people go above and beyond what is legally required even if they feel a bit exploited because they see the benefit in getting a great reference.

If there is any inkling that a great reference wouldn't be forthcoming I might be a bit more forthright in my advice as some people just don't care how much 'above and beyond' is happening.

I wouldn't intervene at the college or with the employer though, my Ds has been working p/t since primary and I let him get on with it for the most part because its part of learning how to stand up for yourself.

Unless your Ds has other issues going on that would make it hard for him to manage his own life/work, I would let him handle it.

Do not go behind his back at this age. Believe me no good will come of it however much you mean to help.
Talk to him directly

I was posting on mumsnet at your sons age, and if my mother had done what you are considering, I'd have been posting about Her! Don't do this, it's awful, you mustn't.