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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To move my children from a perfectly good school and home

46 replies

Wooodpecker · 22/06/2014 21:58

More WWYD than AIBU I suppose...

I am thinking of moving about 5 miles away to an area with an outstanding secondary school , lovely green environment nearby , big sports field etc. The catch is neither DH or I are that keen on the area after a drive round today - just a bit dull really.

The reason for the move is our local secondary is generally bad (Ofsted/results/rep) in a less than ideal environment (built up area/poor sports ground) but there is a new head trying to turn it around but early days (heard good things though). It would mean moving our 3DDs from the primary they love, leaving our local supportive network of friends (help each other out with lifts for kids, baby sitting, feeding pets etc) and leaving our house of 10 years. Not so bothered by the last point as the house is a tad small so a move has always been on the cards.

Eldest DD is in year 4 so we have a few years but the secondary in the 'new' area has a feeder school system and I have heard of some people having to wait over a year to get into one of the feeder schools so want to allow time.

AIBU to want to move or would you sit tight and see how the local school pans out?

OP posts:
usualsuspectt · 22/06/2014 22:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 22/06/2014 22:03

Could you keep them where they are, but go ahead with the move so that you'd be living in catchment for your first choice secondary?

Preciousbane · 22/06/2014 22:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NoodleOodle · 22/06/2014 22:06

I like Iwis's suggestion. Also, don't just go off heresay, find out from the schools/LEA what the admissions policy and subscription situation is.

NoodleOodle · 22/06/2014 22:06

*hearsay

Arudonto · 22/06/2014 22:08

I would move seeing as you say a move has always been on the cards and your house is a tad small. Your kids are still quite young and its easier to adjust to a new place when kids are smaller( much easier get to know people through school in the early years versus secondary).
The area may not seem amazing but a good school and sports opportunities are big plus'.

Plus its only 5 miles away!you can still see your friends quite easily it will just take a bit more effort.

WashingFanatic · 22/06/2014 22:08

If the secondary is really awful, I'd move. Your dd's love their school, within a month they'll probably love their new school as well.

Support networks can be built up in a new area and unless you're moving 30 miles away will still be there, just maybe need more planning.

Why don't you like the area? What's worse than where you are now?

antimatter · 22/06/2014 22:09

are you going 5 miles in London or some other densely populated city so you assume you are going to leave all your friends and lose touch with them?

do you have to move your kids now to another primary school even if you were to move in the next 3 months?

can't they stay where they are?

WashingFanatic · 22/06/2014 22:11

Missed the 5 miles.

5 miles is hardly 'leaving' your support network! It's 10 minutes in the car.

GinAndToast · 22/06/2014 22:11

Erm, 5 miles? That's still the "same area" really ;-) It's only 10/15 minutes away surely?

soverylucky · 22/06/2014 22:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

antimatter · 22/06/2014 22:14

5 miles in London could be 40 min Grin (each way)

Sidthesausage · 22/06/2014 22:18

All state schools everywhere feed into their catchment secondary.

I would be more fishing. There are a few areas near us that on the surface look like they don't have much going on BUT once you take a closer look there's tons of sports activities, a youth club, skate ramp, toddler and art groups, hidden a shops/pubs. I don't think you can get a true feel from a quick drive round.

Also 5 miles isn't far for old friends. It's next to nothing.

LemonSquares · 22/06/2014 22:35

The local secondary has been turning round for the last 7 years - they have done everything new teachers, eventually new buildings , new heads - it improves for a bit then it drops - it has just again headed into special measures.

Other schools in the area have brought up results but the local seems immune. Even when they have good results - they really arn't that great when you look into them.

So for 5 miles - I'd move rather than hope but that's us.

Original poster
Wooodpecker · 22/06/2014 23:09

Thanks all. We can't leave the DDs in their school as the new schools has feeder schools so we would need then to be in those. I know 5 miles is not far but its in London so would take a while ( outer London) and some of our local friends would undoubtedly still see us but I suspect some wouldnt. Its more all the little comforts and we have set up. A trusted babysitter, friends who will have the kids whilst we look at sofas or something simarly dull for young children.

Interesting point lemonsqaures.

OP posts:
antimatter · 22/06/2014 23:12

you'll soon fing out who your friends are Grin

Original poster
Wooodpecker · 22/06/2014 23:18

I know antimatter Smile. I am not bothered about that. Its life. Our local network are for people we know through the children and inevitably we are friends with some more than others. Nevertheless we will miss them and the help we give and receive. Mercenary but we have no family nearby.

OP posts:
Original poster
Wooodpecker · 22/06/2014 23:20

'Are people' not 'for people'.

OP posts:
Icimoi · 22/06/2014 23:27

All state schools everywhere feed into their catchment secondary.

Not so. Strictly there's no such thing as a catchment secondary especially in the Greater London areas. Admissions criteria mostly go along the lines of:

  1. SEN and looked after children;
  2. Other special circumstances;
  3. Siblings
  4. Distance

There are obviously variations on that, especially in faith schools.

OP, I've been thinking about this in terms of where I live and where there would be similar issues. My first reaction was that in your position I would leave the children where they are, but then I thought of the local dodgy secondary academy and realised that in your shoes I'd probably move in order to avoid it. Obviously that all depends on whether your local secondary is as dodgy as ours!

antimatter · 22/06/2014 23:36

In borough of Sutton there are no feeder schools - so I think Icimoi is right that applies to all London boroughs/schools.

Original poster
Wooodpecker · 22/06/2014 23:39

The better school is an academy and has its own admissions. It has a defined catchment with several feeder schools within that area. You have to living within catchment and at one of the schools to be prioritised. Next is people within the catchment but not in one of the schools. I have just realised what happens if they change which feeder schools. This is all such a gamble .

The local school is bad but not the wors for a city. They. Consistently have the worse GCSEs in the borough and grade 3 Ofsted so not special measures or that bad. Horrid grounds though but we live in a built up area. I can't realistically expect the fields I had at my school in the country. Smile

OP posts:
Original poster
Wooodpecker · 22/06/2014 23:41

The better school is also not in a London borough. Its one of the home counties so that may also explain the catchment.

OP posts:
Original poster
Wooodpecker · 22/06/2014 23:42

Please excuse my terrible punctuation.

OP posts:
antimatter · 22/06/2014 23:43

if this is the school you are after you have no choice but to move

everything else will sort itself out

as a mother of 2 teenagers in outstanding schools I can assure you all is worth the hassle you are going through if you can see your kids doing well Smile

Original poster
Wooodpecker · 23/06/2014 00:06

Thank you.

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