LGs mother suggestions

[daughterlovingdaddy]

Hi,I'm new to this and just signed up.

I just want some opinions,nasty or negative I don't mind.

The situation, I have my LG 3 overnights but it's consists of mon and Tues overnight until 4 pm wed.back to mine thurs morn until 4 pm Fri.Then back to mine Sunday morn until 4 pm.

We have split up for over a year and I met someone else.we have spent so much time in each others company until the time was right to introduce her to my LG. before LGs mother told me to keep current gf away from LG which I agreed. LG now says my gf name at mothers house and mother now wants her to stay away.

what to do? Sorry for confusing story but LG is growing up and realising what's going on etc

Mum has no right tp dictate who your daughter sees when she is in your care.

But I would suggest court and getting access formally agreed so that she cannot then use access to your daughter as a weapon

I am a little confused. Is your time with her so broken up because she is very little? Did you agree to keep GF away from your daughter then introduced her anyway without telling her mother? Does the mother want the daughter or the GF to stay away?

Sorry lol. Time is broken up becuz we broke up when LG was young. Now 2.

Yes,agreed to keep gf away until time was right and LG mother said it's ok now has kicked off about LG saying current gf name.
mother wants gf to stay away from LG in my care. It's crazy or am I being selfish

You are allowed to make decisions while your daughter is in your care as long they as they are safe decisions for her. If you trust your GF and think that she is an appropriate person to be around your daughter, you as a parent get to make that decision. Why do you think your ex is objecting?

Yes they're defo safe decisions and I would do anything for my little girl. Yes she is also a registered child minder and a very close friend and family friend and she's brilliant with LG.
I would say spite, she had everything and lost it due to cheating. She doesn't want to see me happy I think, I don't do enough yet I buy everything LG needs as I provide for my side when LG stays

Make sure you get the agreement firmed up then. Everything in writing and legal.

Yes, thank you. I have already sourced information and unfortunately nothing can really be done unless social services get involved and something happens

What about a Court order?

www.gov.uk/looking-after-children-divorce/types-of-court-order

You trust this woman, you've known her a long time. Ex initially agreed. How long have you been together? Personally I'd want to make sure it was long term before partners were introduced.

Other than that she has no right to dictate to you. As long as your daughter is safe there should be no complaints.

Thank you for the information mrsterrypratchett.

Together over a year already,LG has really took to gf.

Yea thank you. Safer at mine than at her mother's house inhaling smoke

You are doing nothing wrong, and there is no reason why you should have to follow your ex's unreasonable demands.

LG? What's that?

Hello

My partner has a 3 year old to his ex, she lives in a different city and his access consisted of driving to that city for 2 days a week and having her there at his mums house, ex said she wasn't allowed to meet me (we have been together 2.5 years) she recently got engaged so surprise I'm finally allowed to, she had her first trip to our house last week

How does your GF feel about it all?

LG means little girl. Used on some forums instead of DD.

Thank you for all your kind comments. It really helps.

Wow Lauren,the frustration levels must have been really high for you I assume? My gf stayed away at start and we have slowly introduced said gf to lg, they get on so well that she calls the gf first rather than me when we arrive home lol. But gf is getting frustrated because lg is part of her life/our life.
LG mother is being unreasonable and knows that she is getting to me causing silly arguments mainly about money and how she goes out 3/4 times a week and gets pointless tattoos etc

Exactly the same in our house, he has her 1 or 2 nights a week but ex says never so she gets full csa, she also tries to get him reviewed constantly incase he has had a pay increase and not told her, she cut contact for 6 months when we got engaged, during the 6 months he had no access she said he could if he made an instant payment too her, she owes him thousands from when they were together he will never get back

I'm glad you are thinking of your partner in this, its been really tough for me as I haven't been allowed to build a relationship with her, and obviously losing my DP for 2 days a week has been tough 2, he has had to leave me during ivf and after major surgery but I know he had to see his DD, its been a real struggle, and I must admit its going to be hard adjusting now access is at our home as from last week, I got her a bedroom ready and decorated and filled it with stuff she will need.

He really regrets pandering to her demands, we got all the forms to take her to court but you can't get free legal hell for access disputes now so he was reluctant to go down that route incase it resulted in access centres etc, she can't stipulate who she sees during your access times

Yeah you have it right down to the tee. Justice system says there's nothing fathers can do bar pay csa even if we have access like mine and your fiancés. It's unreal what can and can't be done with something so important that affects a child's life,it's not about the money for me. It's about the right life for the child and that she deserves a better environment to grow up in.

Awh frig,sorry to hear it's been like that on you but at least things are on the mend now and that you can see her and provide for her. I've done the same,got my LG bed and furniture etc so she can call it her home when she is here.

I know what he means and how he feels. No matter what we fathers do,the ex seems to always have some hold,get some legal advice and see what the best route is. Last thing you need is no access again