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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to feel guilty that I've moved house 7 times with son?

13 replies

exmrs · 16/06/2014 12:22

As above I'm getting ready to move again to 7 th house with son aged 7.

I've not had any luck with houses and most moves have been down to circumstances like work,family ,ex leaving and landlords wanting their house back and now had to move out of 2 council properties due to neighbours noise and other anti social behaviour.

My friends think in mad and say I can't believe you moving again! As if I have a choice, I don't want to but when you live in a terraced house and they make noise at all hours and my son has to sleep in my room due to the noise then I feel I have to move so we can sleep.

I feel so guilty moving again even though son wants to move as he fed up with the noise but I feel I've let him down in not having a home to call ours.

Has anyone else moved this amount of times ?

OP posts:
buddles · 16/06/2014 12:23

No need to feel guilty. My DS had lived in 3 places by the time he was 21 months. I moved twice in 6 months. Never again!

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 16/06/2014 12:25

Well to be honest it does sound excessive and if you have no choice but......

I have a friend like this - she has moved houses (and her DS's school) a fai few times in his 11 years but she does have a choice but everytime she has a disagreement, or something happens to her she just runs away and moves rather than just toughing it out and dealing with it.

Have you really had to move.....every time?

Singlesuzie · 16/06/2014 12:29

Goodness how do you afford it? Moving is so expensive. Dont feel guilty if you really have no choice.

Not sure if you've done all this but try and do lots of research into the place you are moving to before signing the contract. You can back out at any point up to that so be sure the place is right for you. Ask around friends who live near there if they know what it's like, any neighbours to avoid? Anti social behaviour etc. find out as much as you can. Also ask why previous tenants are leaving, i would een approach tenants myself and ask them.

Try and be as sure as possible that you sre miving somewhere you will want to stay in.

exmrs · 16/06/2014 12:29

I have kept my son at the same school throughout I really can only think of one move where I didn't really have to go but it was a case of the rent being high

OP posts:
Singlesuzie · 16/06/2014 12:32

Ok so you are moving within the same area each time so you know the area. This is good, use all your contacts to find out as much as you can about where you are going and whether its a safe bet or not. Ask everyone you know for recomendations on where to live and who to rent from etc.

APlaceInTheWinter · 16/06/2014 12:32

My DB moved lots of times when his dc's were small. His moves were all work related. I know my dnieces were sad at the time but more because of leaving friends than leaving houses iyswim.

Anyway, needs must and DB's dc's have definitely not suffered any long lasting ill effects! They all have circles of close friends.

sonlypuppyfat · 16/06/2014 12:34

My DH is in his mid 50s and has only ever lived in two houses!

exmrs · 16/06/2014 12:37

I really thought people would flame me and suggest I'm the problem rather than neighbours but it really is a case of circumstances and the fact I'm now limited to council housing due to ex husband leaving me in the shit

Thanks for all the advice , I actually know the area I'm going it's near my mums but it's pot luck as to what neighbours I get

OP posts:
landrover · 16/06/2014 12:41

As long as he is not having to move schools, I don't think its a problem at all! (Moving schools however, would be awful) x

Paq · 16/06/2014 13:18

Is your son fine? Then it's fine :) I moved between 3 countries, 6 times my first 10 years. It just made me love travelling.

I was with my family who loved me and that's all the stability I needed. :)

Paq · 16/06/2014 13:19

PS - I also moved schools in all that time. Again, it was fine. It made me very good at getting to know new people.

MotherOfInsomniacToddlers · 16/06/2014 13:38

I think you just have to do whatever is best for you. I know he won't remember it but dc2 had lived in 4 different houses by 10.5 months. Hmm

noddyholder · 16/06/2014 13:40

My ds is 20 and has moved 14 times He is back from uni atm and our house is still a magnet for all his mates The forever family home thing is a myth sold to us by John Lewis and M&S

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