To think three year olds don't wear red lipstick, even on stage?

[DrSeuss]

DD has just turned three a few weeks ago and goes to a dance class, which she loves. They have a show coming up, her first and we are all really looking forward to it. However, the kit list specifies red lippy and blusher! DH and I were horrified!

Thoughts?

Oh, and I also used to finish up doing stage work, and hop straight in my bike and climb trees etc with my brothers once home. It isn't one or the other.

I also played on the hockey team at school, and was a high jump champion amongst other things.

Wearing make up as part of a hobby I did didn't stop any of that.

At one point DD2 did ballet and played rugby.

An exam grade ballet bun takes less than 2 minutes, for tha majority of girls. (Very long and very short hair is harder).

Karala, I'm going to challenge you to take a proper ballet class and then get back to me on whether it's "prancing around" or an exhausting, sweaty, exhilarating lark. Let me know how you fare. If you're still conscious.

Also totally agree that the idea that how you look, dress comes from outside not your hobbies.

Leotards, scruffy jogging trousers and wetsuits. Have no bearings on last nights short dresses, make up, posh hair does and high heels.

That was my 13&16y DDs confirming to the convention for young women going out for a meal.

and having fun with it

There was no reason for the elaborate hair does, they like doing each other's hair and they had time while DH and me throw ourselves under the shower.

I knew I shouldn't have exposed my deeply controversial views I accept I am in a tiny minority - literally all my friends with girls are deeply into the ballet world. I am not "narrow" mine - did a term to give it a go but didn't really take to it and must say I found the whole set up rather odd. When I did dance as a child it involved tearing round a church hall not hair styling and make up and having exactly the right clothes. For 3 year olds!

Not changing my views though - little Tamaras would be much happier on the trampoline hair flying free...

And why do you think that Tamara can't do both? Are you really that narrow sighted?

You don't wear make-up in a ballet class. Most schools have a dress code but any sport/activity does. You have to have your hair out of your face too but again you do that for any sport.

You haven't taken a real ballet class.

Hey, it's not controversial to dislike ballet. You just need to take a ballet class before you start telling everyone what it's like.

This is standard in my experience.

I found it odd seeing DD in make up at first but it is definitely preferable to actually be able to see their feature under stage lighting...

Also nothing at all to do with looking 'pretty'

The point of the bun after all is to keep their hair out the way and not distract from the lines their body is making. It's not about having a pretty hairstyle.

Nocomet - two of my DDs also did both ballet and rugby, and to be honest, keeping their hair back for rugby was much more of a hassle than for ballet. I can still remember the look of panic on one poor boys face as he lined up for the opposition to be confronted by DD2, hair in plaits at either side of her head, a boy under each arm, grinning at him .

And re Tamara preferring trampolining with her hair flying loose - the hair requirements for competitive trampolining were much more stringent than for ballet, hair dangling all over the place is far too dangerous.

Absolutely re:trampolining. My dd1 takes trampolining classes (will never compete as won't reach te standard required) and just last week I was reminded that we hair needed a cut (it did, we were overdue) or tying back (she has a bob normally). Just as it would if she were in a ballet class. No difference at all.

And even my dd2, who always has her (long) hair down from preference will tie her hair up when on our trampoline, as it is more comfortable than it flying free and getting in her eyes etc.

I agree with OP, when I see the pics on facebook of friend's preschoolers made up ready for stage I think it looks horrible. My dc do ballet, at a school that doesn't do exams or have a uniform but does do a show. We are asked to put hair in a bun but are not asked to put slap on them. They perform on a stage with lights, it is fine, they look like themselves. I am aware that if they want to do ballet seriously this will change, but by then they will be older and be able to make decisions for themselves. Let kids be kids fgs.

Personally I have an extremely pale complexion should I have to wear make up every day to avoid looking washed out .

Let kids be kids fgs.

I do let DD be a kid. on account of her age, she is a kid all the time. once she wore a stage costume that included makeup. It's not like those awful American beauty pageants.

should I have to wear make up every day to avoid looking washed out

Do you spend every day on stage under harsh lighting? No? there's your answer then.

It's just part of the costume.

Eek - just received the make up list for dds show

Boys & Girls

Duo Eye Shadows 4 shades of brown, cream, etc
Rose blush
Eyeliner & mascara
Foundation & powder

Girls only

Red, pink & raisin lipsticks!!!

Alarmonsnooze if I ever have a daughter I want her to be exactly like you- active, go getting, dedicated and energetic. I love the idea of doing loads of activities

Depends on the size of the theatre. If it's a small venue (say, 100 seats or so) then it helps to pick out features onstage but is not totally necessary. Stage lighting is very bright and can make features difficult to pick out. If the venue is bigger (say 1000 seats) then if the kids don't have strong makeup on, people at the back won't be able to see facial features at all.

In large dance shows I've worked on, the need for strong, almost doll like makeup is requested so that parents at the back can tell which child is theirs! Especially if they all have the same hairstyle/costume, it can be hard to tell. It also photos better - if the school is recording the performance then it will look much clearer on the recording.

She will look very very odd under normal lighting! The rule I've always applied is if you look like you might have too much makeup on, you probably don't have enough!

Yanbu to feel odd about putting thick, strong makeup on a 3yo though. It is weird the first few times - but it's usual, and for a technical reason, so I wouldn't worry about it. If you go light handed, the teachers will probably strengthen it anyway.

For the pp who asked why the school doesn't have it's own makeup supply - we would never do this for hygiene reasons. Very difficult to ensure everything was clean. Imagine the same mascara on 150 pairs of eyes?? Yuck.

And just to clarify - the term 'washed out' doesn't mean the same thing as irl: washed out on a day to day basis might just mean someone looking a little grey or tired. Washed out on stage literally means all the colour and contour stripped from the face.

And one last point - if your dds are serious about ballet, as they get older, they are entering one of the most body fascist environments imaginable. I got out of ballet in my early teens but even by 13 I was sick of going to a class every week to learn to dance, only to spend two hours being told my boobs were getting too big and I was very 'hippy' and hearing my friend get called 'sack of potatoes' and so on. Some schools are better, but ballet is all about the body, all about being thin and if your daughters want to pursue it as they get older, a bit of red lipstick is the least of your worries. Horrible industry.

Belle that reminds me of when I was doing ballet as an early teen (I really wasn't that good though) and my teacher kept on at me to do something about my square shoulders, I should make them more rounded - well short of taking a bone saw to my collarbones, it wasn't going to happen! But she seemed to think I could do something about my basic shape...

I can't even begin. Too tall (how is that my fault?) too busty (at 13?? She should see me now ) too 'hippy' (that one never left me) and altogether just treated like she didn't know why I was bothering. I was much better at tap anyway