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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take DS out and about?

19 replies

whynowblowwind · 13/06/2014 08:20

DS is 7 and in Year 2.

Yesterday evening he said he didn't feel well and I've kept him off school today as he said he felt sick this morning. (He had 3 days off in January with a really grotty cold but has had no time off this year apart from today.)

I've got a friend staying at the moment and we were planning to go to the beach. It's a bit of a drive - about 2 hours, and I'm tempted to go anyway and take DS.

If I'm honest I have a feeling he wanted the day off because he didn't want friend, myself and DD to have a day without him. However, I had to be practically dead before my parents let me miss a day of school and I hated it! So I believed him although I was a bit Hmm - I'm just worried he'll try the same stunt again if he has a "treat" day.

Should I keep us all at home?

OP posts:
Meloria · 13/06/2014 08:22

Yes. Don't teach him that this is a tactic he can use to get treats.

ikeaismylocal · 13/06/2014 08:25

I'd ask him if he's feeling up to it, if he wants to go I'd go ( with some sick bags and wipes!).

He's only young, he'll probably have a lovely time at the beach.

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 13/06/2014 08:26

Meloria - you see, that is precisely what I know I SHOULD do!

But what I WANT to do is what ikea said!

I am terrible at this parenting lark.

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 13/06/2014 08:28

I'd ask him if he felt up to going out.

And then I'd drop him at school on the way to the beach.

WooWooOwl · 13/06/2014 08:29

I wouldn't take him to the beach.

If he's well enough to go to the beach, he's well enough to be at school.

If you have suspicions that he was trying it on, then by letting him have the day off school as well as a treat, you are basically telling him that it's fine for him to lie to get what he wants and that missing school doesn't really matter.

The way your parents dealt with it is irrelevant. You clearly do let him have a day off school if he's ill enough to warrant it, so you won't be passing something on that you hated regardless of whether you let him go to the beach.

DogCalledRudis · 13/06/2014 08:30

Just take him

redskyatnight · 13/06/2014 08:30

Well I have to admit I wouldn't let a child who said they felt sick and had no other symptoms stay at home.

I would ask him if he feels up to a day at the beach - if he says he does you can tell him he's well enough for school then and pack him off there.

Lonecatwithkitten · 13/06/2014 08:31

I have a rule that if your too sick for school you are too sick for anything else apart from staying home quietly.
So no I would not go to the beach I am afraid.
Though only the lesser forms is death allow you to miss school.

fairylightsintheloft · 13/06/2014 08:31

Yeah sorry but if he's well enough for the beach he's well enough for school. Just make sure you take him another time

DurhamDurham · 13/06/2014 08:34

Hmmm you could be setting yourself up for future phantom illnesses if he knows he only has to say he feels sick and he gets to go to the beach.

I'm a bit harsh though, both my girls knew I had to see vomit or blood before I would even consider letting them stays off school. I always worked full time so it wasn't so easy as just letting them stay home Smile

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 13/06/2014 08:36

That's always been my stance as well Lone, and to be fair he wanted to go to school this year when he had that nasty cold but I wouldn't let him - it was a really grotty one!

I don't know, I'm tempted to go and have a Talk with him later about telling the truth.

OP posts:
SecretSpy · 13/06/2014 08:36

I agree if he's well enough for the beach he's well enough for school.

and if he is poorly the last place I'd want to be stuck with a vomming child is the seaside two hours awayShock

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 13/06/2014 08:37

That was what my parents were like though Durham and it's no criticism of you but it was horrible being sick in school or feeling like your head was bursting but having to sit in geography! Grin

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 13/06/2014 08:40

School hasn't started yet! Bring him in!! Wtf?

DurhamDurham · 13/06/2014 08:43

Oh I know, I used to feel awful. One particular occasion I was interviewing applicants for a new post. A work colleague came in a asked to speak to me, school had phoned to say my youngest dd had been sick and could I collect her.
Of course I left straight away to collect her but she had said she hadn't felt great that morning and I'd jollied her along saying 'oh you will be fine etc' when I picked her up she was sick on my shoes which I guess I deserved Grin

wannaBe · 13/06/2014 08:49

If he says he feels ill then he should stay in bed, the end. It's a terrible message to give a child that lying to get what you want is acceptable. In fact if I really thought he was trying it on I would ask your parents or similar to come round and babysit while you and friend and dd go to the beach. He won't do it again.

Sirzy · 13/06/2014 08:52

So you plan of taking him on a fun day out and then when you get back from enjoying yourselves say to him "oh Ye but don't pretend to be ill?" Not sure that will work!

Either send him to school or stay at home.

polarpercy · 13/06/2014 08:59

I'd do what Laurie suggested! Well enough for fun, you're well enough for school. Otherwise you might find whenever he has a test or homework in that he hasn't done, he feels sick! Good luck!

Luggagecarousel · 13/06/2014 09:02

in our house, sick people stay in bed all day with no screens anywhere around them.

Well people go to school or work

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