Exclude a child

[emmamme]

Do you think it is acceptable to not invite a child to parties simply because you don't like the mother?

Interested to hear your thoughts....

I'll be watching this with interest!

No.

I think it depends...

Does your child want the child there?

Are you inviting the whole class/friendship group? It's not in to exclude one child IMO.

What has the mother done to upset you (or her as I assume you're probably talking about your own child being excluded)?

More info needed I think.

no I think it would be mean and petty

No unless the parent's behaviour would put you, your family or your property in danger. Otherwise, suck it up, especially if it would be very obvious that that child was excluded.

Not acceptable. Twatty. Not you OP, surely?

It depends. If the DC are best friends then I'd suck it up but if their presence wouldn't be missed then I wouldn't bother.

No, not unless she is as mentioned above dangerous. If your children are friends you will have to suck it up.

There were quite a few mums at the primary DD attended that I didn't get on with, just because we were very very different (I got looked down on for f/t working in an area where this was 'not done', but that's a whole other thread). I still invited their children, and the children still came to the parties.

No. One of my kids has a good friend in her class with a mother who makes me want to run for the hills - overbearing, screechy, gossipy, negative. Parties are only once a year, so I let it go. Avoid her at all costs otherwise.

No. If my DC wants the child to come he or she will get an invitation. I don't think about the parents at all.

No, not at all

My DCs have had plenty of friends where the parents are decidedly iffy and who I haven't taken to, but my kids like their kids and so of course the DCs are welcome in my home or at parties etc.

Is it your child op or your childs friend not that it really matters but no there is some mothers I dont even know never mind not like that came to parties

maybe. I'd have to dislike the other parent hugely.

My girls were invited to a party where I know the mother didn't like me and vice versa. Girls enjoyed the party and me and the Mum were civil to each other.

It helped me lots that dh was there so I had someone to chat too.

We had a run in with one set of parents and DD was excluded from several girls' parties for a couple of years.

Was bitchy and small minded and I will never forgive the protagonist.

It's my daughter that is being excluded. There have been a few occasions where we have arrived at preschool to find all the children opening invites. Thankfully she isn't really bothered but makes me feel like the worst mother ever, like I have failed her.

The parents are cliquey and most don't even say hello! I'm not fully sure why they dislike me but can only speculate that it's because I don't share my woes, I am pretty direct and have only been in the village for a few years. I was also the preschool chair for a few years and I don't think that won me any popularity contests.

I really don't know what to do going forward???

I just think they dont know you maybe thevkids are not friends pleasr dont take this to heart

no this happens to my mom the child tells my son he wants him there when the invites go out his name is not there he is upset more than gutted the mom invites everyone but my son for no reason we haven't even argued we still speak sometimes she is just a twunt of the first order

my son is five years old and wishes to move schools due to this im not a nasty parent im just not a catty chatty one either this counts against me

*son not mom obviously bad day here

At preschool it does tend to be much more who the mothers get on with. When they're at school it's much more who the children like. In some ways it's going to be that because parents tend to stay much more at the younger parties, and so not wanting to sit round and do small talk with someone takes on more significance.

But it's also worth thinking "I am pretty direct" is often used by someone for whom others would put "she is rude and hurtful".

Fuck 'em. If your DD isn't bothered then just relish the fact that you don't have to spend more time with twatty parents. Hopefully it won't continue for long once your DD reaches an age where her friends will be more vocal on who they want.

It's good your dd isn't bothered but I would probably be feeling like you do. Least to don't have to spend time with the parents.