Probably over reacting

[Hurr1cane]

But I need a rant because I wanted to rant at the dad but I wasn't about to in front of the kids.

DS has autism and complex medical and learning needs, but he's in a specialist behaviour school at the moment. (When he was younger he had violent meltdowns and mainstream was so terrible that I just chose the first school I saw with a place to get him out of there, he is moving to more specialist provision soon)

Anyway this morning we were stood on the school playground waiting for school to open and DS and his friend *kian were playing 'tig' (run around in circles) while me and Kian's mum watched.

Another little boy, *bradley came with his dad and he joined in the game. All fine. Then he decided out of the blue to flying kick my DS. It's a behaviour school. But Bradley's dad just stood there and looked at him, doing and saying nothing. So I called DS over and checked him and he said 'Bradley kick DS, hurt DS' still Bradley's dad said nothing. Then Bradley went running over to Kian and started twisting his arm around really far saying "I'm gonna break your arm" printing Bradley's dad to say 'oh stop being so fucking stupid'

All this happened within about 3 minutes and then the doors opened and Bradley ran into school.

I walked DS up to his 1:1 and told her about Bradley kicking DS because he was crying and she said she'd sort it out and make him apologise.

Does anyone else get really aggravated with other children's parents when they do absolutely nothing about bad behaviour? And swearing around school?

I'll not do anything I just needed a massive rant and didn't want to rant in RL

The first paragraph was meant to read, 'it happens because it's a behaviour school'

Should I call school and have a quick word or do you think I should just leave it?

You've already had a word with school so I'd leave it

What is a behaviour school ?

It's a special school for children with emotional social and behaviour problems.

A lot of the children there have conditions that affect their behaviour and a lot of the children there have had a really crappy time in life and that has caused some major issues for them.

All the children are amazing and lovely, there are just some issues.

I would be emailing the Head tbh and requesting a meeting . You haven't had a with with the school, you've spoken to the 1:1 who will have a million things to do and has not been instructed to take it forward formally.

It matters not a jot that it's a PRU, Bradley and his ineffectual father need to be addressed. How is behaviour going to improve otherwise?

Don't make the mistake of thinking there is certain behaviours are more acceptable because it's a PRU and "what else can we expect". You can expect your child NOT to he hurt that's what.

Oh and please get your ASD child out of there pronto. I don't think a PRU is suitable for a child with ASD and neither do any of the professionals who worked with my ds (also ASD). You've been fobbed off if that's all they've offered you.

Thank you. I meant I'm not concerned about the fact that DS was hurt (well obviously I am but it's happened now and DS will have forgotten about it already) I was more bothered about Bradley, who needs guidance with his behaviour and got none.

I have just come off the phone with the headteacher who thanked me for telling her and said she needs to have a think about how to proceed about behaviour at school gates in the morning (parents taking their own children to school is a very new thing that's happened due to lack of funding for transport)

DS has a place at another school and is in transition process at the moment. I really can't fault the school for the way they've looked after DS though. Nothing was too big an effort to personalise his plans and his education.

That sounds really positive . Glad that you've somewhere lined up for him.

Me too nicki, although I am very anxious about the move. It took a lot of fighting to get him into the good special school in the LEA (not the failing one with lots of places) but I did it and now I'm pooing my pants about how he will cope with the transition. (The worry never bloody goes away does it?)

I would certainly address the swearing with the school that really isn't acceptable. I'm sure they are well aware of Bradley's behaviour and apparent lack of parenting and it's effects on Bradley. You have addressed the hurting with the 1:1 and that's fine, but when that spills over to your child witnessing swearing from a parent that's not on either and needs to be raised.

Canthisonebeused

Swearing is my pet peeve at the school gates, and it's not just certain parents, some of the taxi drivers are just as bad, which is why I take DS myself.

No it never does. I have had to home educate ds as nothing worked for him, mainstream, specialist unit etc. He's doing well at home and is calm and happy so sometimes I wonder if it's time to try again but is he only calm and happy because he's at home? Would it all just kick off again if he goes back? It's such a minefield.

Nicki I seriously considered the home schooling option when I thought that the failing special school was going to be the only option (I say failing, there has been countless accusations of abuse and I was only there 2 minutes before I saw teachers acting in a way that made me feel very uncomfortable.)

If it wasn't for the whole social skills and learning independence thing I'd keep him at home.

(Saying that I will keep him at home if the new school doesn't work out. I'd rather my child be happy before anything else in the world)