To be sad that Ds, 8, has been told about sex by his school mates

[balenciaga]

Or possibly being massively naive tbh. As I was only 9 or 10 when I heard about it in the playground and that was the late 80's!!

Anyway he asked me where babies come from on the way to school this morning and I started to explain to him in basic terms (whilst CRINGING) and I just got the feeling he already knew so I asked him and he said yes he knew

Just feel sad I suppose that another part of his innocence has gone. He already doesn't play with toys anymore, it's all about his Xbox, wwe wrestling, mine craft and his phone. (Btw the phone only has games on it, he can't call / text / go online)

Also I am shit at explaining things and I don't know if I've explained it very well to him and the last thing I want is to confuse him or make him feel like there's something embarrassing / wrong about sex...as my dm was awful at telling us about sex and somehow made me think it was embarrassing, wrong and shameful. and tbh it had the opposite effect as I went out and did it at 13 and slept with absolutely loads of boys (and men) before I was even 18. And tbh I still now have issues around love / relationships etc

I just want my dc to feel "normal" about it, and understand it properly, so any advice would be very handy right now. And any suggestions of an age appropriate book we could get him maybe?

Loosing innocence FFS.

Y,N.B.U. Nor are you a shit mum. Please do not undermine yourself. It's just that some parents feel more comfortable talking to their D.C's about the birds and the bees. It's the way the world is.
My D.D asked me when she was 7 "How does a baby happen", and I just explained to her, she giggled what 7 year old wouldn't, but if she was mature enough to ask the question then she was mature enough for the answer I.M.O
I'd bet all 8 year olds know about sex. x

If it makes you feel any better, OP,
H's parents never told him about sex or provided a book or anything. They also sent him to an old-style Catholic school where it certainly wasn't on the curriculum so by 18 he knew literally NOTHING
(officially, anyway).
They also refused to discuss 'anything embarrassing' when our IVF Consultant needed us to ask them Qu's about potential genetic issues.

You HAVE to be better than that - your son feels like he can TALK to you!

Get some books that he can keep in his room.
Listen and reply when he wants to bring it up.
Let it be a normal part of your life - no big deal.

You sound like a great mum to me!

I'd let the school know that the children are discussing it and ask them when they plan to do sex ed.

I think that letting your DS know that he can talk to you if he is curious and being able to ask questions and get an answer is very important. I remember when I had sex education in year 6 - it all seemed very simple and it wasn't until I was much older that I realise that some effort/thrusting was involved rather than "penis goes it, ejaculates, fertilises egg, baby grows, the end" that I felt we were taught at school.

With puberty starting younger and younger, I feel it's important that our children are informed to be able to know what's happening to their bodies and to know what's appropriate and what isn't.

I don't necessarily see the jump between knowing how babies are made and them shagging each other.

Children are curious and it's around this time that they start questioning where babies come from - and hey, being able to actually have a conversation about your willy - how funny is that??!

Please don't let the school know kids are giggling about sex in the playground you'll look like a loon. Kids have giggled about sex since schools existed.

It amazes me how much some parents are happy to rely on school to educate thier children about everything.

Children laughing about sex should not prompt the school to deviate from the curriculum. It should prompt parents to have open and honest talks with their children about these things.

I have an 8yo ds. He's known the basics for 4 or 5 years now. If you tell them when they're little, they think it's funny, nothing embarrassing at all. My 8yo still thinks it's funny!

You are definitely not a shit mum, every mum is different and every mum has things they look back on and would have done differently. There are and will be other things that all the other mums wish they'd done your way.

Now your son is 8 he gets information from all sorts of sources including his mates and you need to be aware of that for the future as sometimes his information will be garbage.

Many parents are quite happy telling their children about sex much earlier - I knew when I was 4 (and it was the 80s!) - and it doesn't destroy their innocence as they are children, it's just a fact to them. My mum told me it was something that only happened between a man and a woman who love each other, nowadays she'd be happy saying that sometimes it's two men or two women but it was a while ago!

However 8 is an age when lots of children start to get told and if you aren't doing it too (or haven't already) they will find out from their mates, usually in garbled terms with much sniggering. The sniggering isn't really because they have lost their innocence but because 8 yr old boys find 8 yr old girls revolting and vice versa, plus sex is really bloody odd when you describe it and sounds disgusting

If it reassures you I was far more innocent being told early than my sniggering mates as I couldn't understand what they were so excited about (there was much collapsing into giggles when anyone said the words 'doing' or 'it') as I'd known for as long as I could remember so it really wasn't very important to me.

I was 8 or 9 when I asked my mother where babies come from. She vaguely pointed downwards and from then on I thought they came out of the belly button. The way she told me made me feel that it was somehow not right and that I still didn't know. It was only after talking about babies' origins that I found out from my schoolfriends and felt silly.

At secondary school we were taught it in Biology lessons and Hygiene lessons. Yes, Hygiene lessons which were part of PE lessons.