To think you just have ONE baby shower?

[LogicalPreference]

I know baby showers are not popular on here and I do also think they are grabby but in general I have no issue with them.

However aibu to think you just have a baby shower when you have your first child - and any other children born afterwards you don't?

I didn't have one for my first so can I have one for my second?

If it's a party to celebrate the good news/ happy arrival then why not one for every baby. If it's just grabby party for presents then you won't need one for every baby but god I hate the americanised horror that is baby showers!

I didn't have one with DS 1 or 2, I'm defo having one with dc3. Personal preference

I had one for my first child, not for my second. It was arranged in secret by friends so I had no say in the matter! I think the thinking is that by your second you'll have all the stuff you need, so no need for everyone to buy you stuff.

In the US where they are very common (would be a bit odd it to not have one, really--like a wedding without a reception), they are generally for first babies only. The exception is for a large gap, ie., a surprise baby 7 or 8 years after the first, when you might have reasonably got rid of all the baby stuff.

I have seen them for second babies of a different gender, though that's a newish trend; more common is a 'diaper shower', to celebrate a second or third baby but without the gifts. Guests just bring diapers or wipes. Weirdly these seem to now be called 'sprinkles' rather than showers. And there's always the crass few who insist on throwing their own shower to get stuff...though we Americans mostly think this is a bit naff too.

I find it irritating to have baby showers dismissed as vile and horrid Americanisms...it's a cultural event marking something important to us. We have a long tradition of them, they were established for a community to help young couples prepare for an expensive and stressful life change. Yes we have registries, but they are also very normal to us--most guests prefer to know what the couple would like, and the big items are usually group gifts (no one expects one guest to buy them a carseat). I don't know a single American who views them as grabby (though lots of us hate the silly games, TBF.)